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        New Message Board Archives >> 2002-2004 Funnies and Jokes >> Actual Military Warnings
        
(Message started by: Hound_Dogg on Sep 5^th, 2003, 9:22am)

Title: Actual Military Warnings
Post by Hound_Dogg on Sep 5^th, 2003, 9:22am

ACTUAL MILITARY WARNINGS, can you believe it?

"Aim towards the Enemy." -Instruction printed on US Rocket Launcher

"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend." -U.S. Army

"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground." -U.S.A.F.Ammo Troop

"If the enemy is in range, so are you." -Infantry Journal

"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit." -Army's magazine of preventive maintenance.

"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed." -U.S. Air Force Manual

"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo." -Infantry Journal

"Tracers work both ways." -U.S. Army Ordnance

"Five-second fuses only last three seconds." -Infantry Journal

"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid." --Col. David Hackworth

"If your attack is going too well, you're probably walking into an ambush." -Infantry Journal

"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection." -Joe Gay

"Any ship can be a minesweeper ... once." -Anon

"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do." -Unknown Army Recruit

"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you." -Your Buddies

(And lastly) "If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him." --U.S.A. Ammo Troop

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