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        New Message Board Archives >> 2002-2004 Funnies and Jokes >> More lessons
        
(Message started by: GCB on Oct 4^th, 2002, 11:00pm)

Title: More lessons
Post by GCB on Oct 4^th, 2002, 11:00pm

Corporate lesson 1

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her
shower when the doorbell rings. After a few
seconds of arguing over which one should go and answer the doorbell, the
wife gives up, quickly wraps herself up in
a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob,
the next door neighbour. Before she says
a word, Bob says,"I'll give you 800 dollars to drop that towel that you
have on." After thinking for a moment, the woman
drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds,
Bob hands her 800 dollars and leaves.
Confused,but excited about her good fortune, the woman wraps back up in
the towel and goes back upstairs. When
she gets back to the bathroom, her husband asks from the shower "Who was
that?" "It was Bob the next door
neighbour," she replies. "Great," the husband says, "did he say anything
about the 800 dollars he owes me?"

Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk in time
with your stakeholders, you may be in a position to
prevent avoidable exposure

Corporate lesson 2

A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side of the road, he
stopped and offered her a lift which she
accepted. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to open and
reveal a lovely leg. The priest had a look
and nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthfully
slid his hand up her leg. The nun looked at him
and immediately said, "Father,remember psalm 129?" The priest was
flustered and apologized profusely. He forced
himself to remove his hand. However, he was unable to remove his eyes
from her leg. Further on while changing gear,
he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, "Father,
remember psalm 129?" Once again the
priest apologized."Sorry sister but the flesh is weak." Arriving at the
convent, the nun got out gave him a meaningful
glance and went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest
rushed to retrieve a bible and looked up psalm
129. It Said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."

MORAL OF THE STORY:
Always be well informed in your job, or you might miss a great
opportunity!

Corporate Lesson 3

Usually the staff of the company play football.
The middle level managers are more interested in Tennis.
The top management usually has a preference for Golf.
Finding: As you go up the corporate ladder, the balls reduce in size.
Another good lesson!!

Corporate Lesson 4

A sales rep, an administration clerk and the manager are walking to
lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They
rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, "I
usually only grant three wishes,so I'll give each of
you just one." "Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be
in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a
care in the world." Poof! She's gone. In astonishment, "Me next! Me
next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii,
relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of
pina coladas and the love of my life." Poof!
He's gone. "OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager
says, "I want those two back in the office
after lunch."

Moral of story: always let your boss have the first say.