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        New Message Board Archives >> 2002-2004 Funnies and Jokes >> Hey, Mikey! Heard you need a lift
        
(Message started by: AlienSpaceBabe on Mar 18^th, 2002, 10:06pm)

Title: Hey, Mikey! Heard you need a lift
Post by AlienSpaceBabe on Mar 18^th, 2002, 10:06pm

A drunk walked into a bar crying. One of the other men at the bar asked him what happened.

"I did a horrible thing," sniffled the drunk. "Just a few hours ago I sole my wife to someone for a bottle of whiskey."

"That is awful," said the other guy. "And now she's gone and you want her back, right?"

"Right," said the drunk, still crying.

"You're sorry you sold her because you realized too late that you love her, right?"

"Oh, no," said the drunk. "I want her back because I'm thirsty again!"

*******************************************

The agent for a beautiful actress discovered one day that she had been selling her body at a hundred dollars a night.

The agent, who had long lusted for her, hadn't dreamed that she had been so easily obtainable. He approached her, told her how much she turned him on and how much he wanted to make it with her.

She agreed to spend the night with him, but said he would have to pay her the same hundred dollars that the other customer did.

He scratched his head, considered it, and then asked, "Don't I even get my agent's ten percent as a deduction?"

"No siree," she said. "If you want it, you're going to have to pay full price for it, just like the other johns."

The agent didn't like that at all, but he agreed.

That night, she came to his apartment after her performance at a local night club. The agent screwed her at midnight, after turning out all the lights.

At 1 a.m. she was awakened again. Again she was vigorously screwed. In a little while, she was awakened again, and again she was screwed. The actress was impressed with her lover's vitality.

"My goodness," she whispered in the dark, "you are virile. I never realized how lucky I was to have you for my agent."

"I'm not your agent, lady," a strange voice answered. "He's at the door taking tickets."

:D ;) :D ;D :D ;) :D ;D :D ;) :D ;D :D ;) :D ;D :D

Title: Re: Hey, Mikey! Heard you need a lift
Post by Mikey on Mar 19^th, 2002, 6:57pm

Thanks so much AlienSpaceBabe I really needed the pick
me up. Those were very good ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!

Mikey, ;D ;D ;D ;D