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        New Message Board Archives >> 2004 Cluster Headache Specific Posts >> trying to keep up with my ch hubbys many new moods
        
(Message started by: snook on Dec 29^th, 2004, 11:08am)

Title: trying to keep up with my ch hubbys many new moods
Post by snook on Dec 29^th, 2004, 11:08am

[smiley=huh.gif] With all the tradegy happening in the world today, I cant help to feel alittle selfish writting to you today. But your my touch stones to keeping in check with the what saddly is our chs world. After my husbands 3 back surgerys the beast moved into our home. Some of you have read situationand responded to my many ?s, and helped me when Ive been down. Though Im the wife of a ch its a challenge dealing with the many moods that my guy goes through. Mornings used to be bright and happy starts to the day. Now it takes him time for the meds to kick in so he can just stand up straight just to get out of bed. But the real challenge is the waiting for the shadows or k5 ect to arrive. hes on all the so called right meds and PATIENTS is what I work on everyday I feel the eggshells under my feet all day long. Im not feeling sorry for myself dont get me wrong its just so sad how sneaky, slowly and evil this ch situation can be. I have a strong faith in god and this site has been such a help to me, I dont share this with friends they DONT get it .my family does but they have life challenges of thier own. Ipray every day for a pf day for Bill and all of you. I really needed to reach out to you guys today, hes at fema tring to get help for the hurricanes that hit here in fla. So while he was out I just need to unload, Im sorry I know all of you chs are the ones who have to deal with the REAL pain of the beast ,its just I want so badly to be there for him and try to best for him .But he has so many different moods to adjust to it makes the day what seems like an emotional roller coaster,Ill get through I always do but like I said before your my TOUCH STONE he and all you chs are the real brave ones all we can do is love and try to be understanding, I pray EVERY DAY the medical profession will find ONE drug that can cure the beast for all of the chs who have to live with this SOAB everyday all day . Again I thank you for letting me unload, and I wish 2005 will be well you all know what we all wish for chs and the ones that love them...!!!!! SNOOK

Title: Re: trying to keep up with my ch hubbys many new m
Post by nani on Dec 29^th, 2004, 11:14am

Feel free to come here and unload anytime you want, honey. I have always said that I would much rather be the sufferer and not the supporter. I can't imagine how difficult it must be to watch someone you love deal with this. Add back surgery to the mix and I imagine it's compounded intensely. It hurts me to think that there are times that my family feels they have to walk on eggs around me. :( But I know it's true. The beast turns me into a b*tch sometimes. I'm sending vibes and prayers to both of you. And lots of [smiley=hug.gif] to you. Thank you from all of us for being such a good supporter.

Title: your the best nani
Post by snook on Dec 29^th, 2004, 12:03pm

[smiley=hug.gif] [smiley=cool2.gif] [smiley=bow.gif] dear dear nani, your the best and always the 1st to respond with such true kindness, I hope you and yours the very best 2005 your my kind of chick, boys dont smut that up I know you guys!!!! ::) :P ;;D love snook

Title: Re: trying to keep up with my ch hubbys many new m
Post by nani on Dec 29^th, 2004, 12:08pm

Thank you, snook. I'm sending wishes for a happy and PF New Year for you and yours, as well.

Title: Re: trying to keep up with my ch hubbys many new m
Post by eddie on Dec 29^th, 2004, 12:28pm

snook sending prayers your way, and you are not
selfish, you are a trooper for what you do for him.
i know i am moody and my wife does anything she
can to help me. i just try not to take it out on her
cause i love her so much. its not her fault
and nani is a sweet lady!!!

Title: Re: trying to keep up with my ch hubbys many new m
Post by vig on Dec 29^th, 2004, 12:34pm

We all appreciate the strength of our supporters and feel good when we can give some back, so hang tough Snook.

Title: Re: trying to keep up with my ch hubbys many new m
Post by CC2004 on Dec 29^th, 2004, 8:09pm

my husband and I have been together 2 1/2 years and it was just a matter of time before the clusters would hit again - he's a very sensitive man and I dreaded what it would do to him. But he's been amazing and manages to cope quite well, understanding that I really am pretty much on my own with these bastards when they hit. One of the hardest things was with the worst attacks when I really needed to let rip with the crying and wailing but didnt want to upset him - the pain is bad enough but its just awful upsetting others on top, even my poor cats freak out when Im under severe attack. Fortunately I seem to be coming to the end of this cycle, but if I got hit again I would ask hubby to go out to his studio so I could be free to behave as wildly as I needed, knowing he would understand that actually not being there would help.
He used to wake and get up with me every night, 3-4 times a night, but I put an end to that, no point both of us being buggered the next day. So eventually he ended up sleeping through them because he knew he couldnt help. But a couple of times I had a few PF nights, then got hit again and each time he was awake in a flash! Those times I did need serious cuddles because its almost worse in a way when you've had some PF time and you think the bastards are going, and then they're back...
[smiley=twocents.gif]
Anyway I use too many words sorry! I just mean, help & support can take many different guises - who other than clusterheads ourselves and wonderful supporters like snook could ever understand that my husband walking out on me during an attack could help!!! Anyone else would think he was an uncaring bastard and that couldnt be further from the truth

Just be there when he needs you - he'll let you know - there's nothing better you can do snook

keep strong [smiley=hug.gif]
CC

Title: Re: trying to keep up with my ch hubbys many new m
Post by E-Double on Dec 30^th, 2004, 12:59pm

You're doing a wonderful job (the toughest job) supporting.

Appreciation is felt towards all of our supporters not just the one('s) we deal with personally.

As many here do, I feel his pain (all of it eek)

It appears to me that needs to find a way to start living again DESPITE the demons.....

Drop me a line or have him do so!

Have a Wonderful Holiday!

Hang in there :)

Eric

Title: Re: trying to keep up with my ch hubbys many new m
Post by Zoom-zoom on Dec 31^st, 2004, 5:20pm

Pain and fear.
That can make anyone mood swing violently.

but Floridian has kept track of studies that show
we are low on seratonin...and other hormones.

That can really affect how we act and speak....

Some peopel are on ANTI-Depressants
and having some success with that.

I may go that route if I ever confirm I am chronic.

We try to pretend that nothing has changed,
and try to cover up for loss days, lost hours....

and just meet with frustration.

That is enough to make me hell to live with.

but my husband knows, better than I do
when I explode, it is at the beast, not at the world.

Egg shells? No one should have to walk on
their toes around me. heck, just knowing you were
doing so would send my into a fit. I don't want
the beast to take anything more than he has to
from my life. So don't let the beast win.
Life your life as best you can, and don't let the
mood swings affect your love....

Title: Re: trying to keep up with my ch hubbys many new m
Post by Redneck on Dec 31^st, 2004, 6:29pm

Snook, he is very lucky to have you there. We tend to forget how valuable support is and how much pain the supporter feels. I hurt my wife deeply for years, any time she tried to tell me how she felt I told her she wasn't feeling the damn pain :-[ OK, I learn slow. I could not have made it this far without her.
You said it best "emotional roller coaster", it is hard to be prepared for the unknown, and the moods come quck and hard at times. Hang in there, come vent, rage, anytime at all.

(((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))