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Title: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by RevDeFord on Jul 31st, 2003, 4:15pm Question: You are walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?" Liberal Answer Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor or opressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun, and what kind of messsage does this send to society and to my children? Is t possile he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definately want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days to try to come to a conclusion. Conservative Answer: BANG! Texan's Answer: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! CLICK...(reload) Wife: "Sweetheart, he looks like he's still moving, what do you kids think?" Son: "Mom's right Dad, I saw it, too." BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!BANG! CLICK...(reload) Daughter: "Nice group, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?" |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by vig on Jul 31st, 2003, 4:18pm I thought that's what kneecaps were for... |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Big_Dan on Jul 31st, 2003, 4:18pm LMFAO!.... ... but something tells me your going to regret posting that... lol -Big Dan |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by BruceD on Jul 31st, 2003, 4:21pm Stupid post-ban mags. ;D BruceD |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by M.R. on Jul 31st, 2003, 5:53pm ROFLMAO This one will make the rounds at work Thanks |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Mark C on Jul 31st, 2003, 6:28pm ;D |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Miklos on Jul 31st, 2003, 8:43pm Since, like your blonde joke post, you lifted this clip from the internet let's see how it goes. Damn Right! Liberals think/worry too much. Conservatives: Don't think. Shoot first; ask questions later. It might have been justified. An all white jury won't convict. Texans: A classic reaction from our executive branch. Shoot everything in sight. Then, have the CIA/FBI tell everybody the guy was probably a terrorist. They have his library and book store records to prove it. Assume personal responsibility a week or two later. For those interested in political excrement, this post provides two piles. The only difference is that the elephant manure is a bigger pile and doesn't smell as sweet. |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Charlie on Jul 31st, 2003, 9:41pm One thing about the Rev: Consistency. Not sure what purpose any of this serves. Charlie |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Kirk on Jul 31st, 2003, 10:24pm A true conservative would have known a Glock is a pistol and not a gun. So I suspect the person behind the post is a Liberal TTFN |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Charlie on Jul 31st, 2003, 10:36pm My liberal family isn't one to fool with. Mom was a pretty good shot and my grandmother kept a .32 in her nightstand. I grew up in a well-armed family. It isn't a good idea to break in here Charlie 8) |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Kirk on Jul 31st, 2003, 10:57pm An armed society is perforce a polite society ;D |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Ted on Jul 31st, 2003, 10:59pm Why would Rev be taking a duck at this? This is the best he could do. I'm quite impressed with this. The Republicans are switching bait by silly things like this hoping no one will ever see the metaphor of this and that guy you just blasted away wasn't really armed but just was of a differerent race. All he held in his hands was a barf bag. But the conservative blew him away and the Texan kept blasting away. The liberal kept asking "what the fuck are you thinking? I WON'T help you hide the body!" I'm quite impressed with you, Rev. For giving up your cowboy-action, idiot-thinking party. Anyone happen to catch the story on the statstics? That thousand wounded isn't a bullet to the leg. It's amputees. It's people losing rheir limbs everyday. It's 25 attacks at our soldiers every day. Yup Rev. Good point! |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Charlie on Jul 31st, 2003, 11:14pm The thing is, Texas is full of Democrats. Always has been. Sadly it's full of people who think God gives a shit about politics. Charlie |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by kim on Jul 31st, 2003, 11:18pm bULLSHIT. think big. think texas. think ya bastid THINK :o |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Ted on Jul 31st, 2003, 11:19pm ROFLMAO This one will make the rounds at work |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by kim on Jul 31st, 2003, 11:28pm Too late. I just shot you all. Yer dead in Texas ;D |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Ted on Jul 31st, 2003, 11:33pm I'd respond to this laughing but you know how it is. Admit you know the code and your tagged for life. DiMagio was third on twice three bases. ;-) |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Big_Dan on Jul 31st, 2003, 11:44pm Personally.. if someone were comming at my wife, child and I, I'd rather have chain-saw... ;D -Big Dan |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by kim on Jul 31st, 2003, 11:46pm What Code? I was playing golf with Bob Hope. Your dead. Admit it. |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Ted on Jul 31st, 2003, 11:49pm Well actually, Dan. If you want to know the fucking truth, and I'm not kidding here (and I'm pretty sure you'll get the same damned thought from anyone, despite partisanship), this "When a child asks why it's raining, tell him God is crying. When he asks why God is crying, tell them 'Probably because of something you did'." is a pretty good fucking quote! |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Ted on Jul 31st, 2003, 11:54pm I admit it. I'm dead. Bob H |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by kim on Jul 31st, 2003, 11:54pm God does not cry. He movesfurniture................ITS KRUMSKY YA NUMPSHELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Kirk on Jul 31st, 2003, 11:56pm A Stihl or a Husky Big Dan? I prefer the Stilh myself. Of course we have trees in the GPNW. |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Ted on Jul 31st, 2003, 11:56pm God does not exist. Furniture is questionable! |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by kim on Aug 1st, 2003, 12:01am yEAH WELL, THE freakin couch just rumbled. i think if i jump onto it wearing a thong, gpd will quit movin the end tables around...... cotton jaw maw |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Kirk on Aug 1st, 2003, 12:02am Oh hell, do what any good Marine would do at that range. Rip his face off and shit in the hole. Save the ammo for someone dangerouse. TTFN |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Ted on Aug 1st, 2003, 12:06am Oh hell. Do what any good marine would do. Say "tata for now." |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by RevDeFord on Aug 1st, 2003, 6:28am You guys that think I posted this for a political statement need to get your head out of your rear end. I read it and it made me laugh, so I wanted to share it to bring a smile to some of your faces. It is a joke you idiots, take it as that and quit being so serious. |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Big_Dan on Aug 1st, 2003, 7:29am I'm not being serious at all.. I think it's friggin' hillarious... ... and thats a Jack Handy quoet, BTW... I just couldn't fit that part in.... ... and Sthil for sure.... my old man has a 15 yr old Sthil... and it still run's like a champ, just a bitch to start... ;D -Big Dan |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Spindrift on Aug 1st, 2003, 7:52am Expect I'm at the opposite end of the political spectrum from RDF and BD.... but I agree with them. This was humor, so let's lighten up! sd |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by SFChris on Aug 1st, 2003, 9:39am sniff.....once again the good Rev makes me want to return to church where killing people is a joke... LOL - unfortunately, there is a bit of truth in it (and it's funny). |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Ree on Aug 1st, 2003, 9:45am leave it to my cluster buds to make a debate out of a joke that has been going around the internet for years...LOL |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Roxy on Aug 1st, 2003, 9:52am ROTFLMAO Good one Rev....thanks, and what makes it funnier is I have stood and had the same conversation with my kids. Not looking at a human, but at a blown apart snake. I can hear my son saying ".......think I saw it move Mom....want me to go get another box of shells?" , while we all stood and stared at the shredded bits. And, yes, it is also true that is this part of the country, if you don't want to get bit, stung or sprayed.....kids do learn early what ammo is loaded into what gun. |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Mark C on Aug 1st, 2003, 11:06am HA HA HA HA ! "An armed society is a polite society. Manners are good when one may have to back up his acts with his life." -Robert A. Heinlein, Beyond the Horizon, 1942 Be afraid...be very afraid!! ;D ;D ;D |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by BruceD on Aug 1st, 2003, 11:15am MarkC ... I love that clip. Nothing wrong with more power. BTW this thread that started with a little joke has taken a lively whir through politics and religion. I still say ... "stupid post-ban mags" :) BruceD |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Big_Dan on Aug 1st, 2003, 11:31am Mark... you have got to be the funniest mufkin' person on here... LMMFYBO!... ;D -Big Dan |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Charlie on Aug 1st, 2003, 4:21pm Gotta give ya credit Mark. Where do ya find 'em? Everyone here must have read RAH. I see his stuff here all the time. Some of it works. Charlie |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Kirk on Aug 1st, 2003, 5:00pm Jeeeze if we're going to quote Heinlen. "Scrooooom" Now where did I put that bottle of Rum. TTFN |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by FrankF on Aug 1st, 2003, 5:12pm BANG! |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Ted on Aug 1st, 2003, 10:14pm Apparently there was something set up ahead of time to take this post and come back, no matter what the respose, to say it was onlt a joke? That knowledge being cleared up I'd like to clear up some more that was the response to this. I am neither Bob Hope nor dead. My "Why would Rev be taking a duck at this?" post was exactly along the same lines and wonder why it was taken as a serious response since it was taking each point one by another in the same vain. I even let you all know furniture is questionable even though God is non-existant. And, I'm just talking about my responses that you all got serious about. Get fucking with it. Furniture agnosticism is the future. Admitting God is a crutch for those who are weak and laughless is more apparent! |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by Charlie on Aug 1st, 2003, 10:32pm Try Robert A. Heinlein's take on god. Oh my. Charlie |
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Title: Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans Post by catlind on Aug 2nd, 2003, 7:24am Gay Deceiver here we come!!! Cat |
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