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Title: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by BuddyH on Jun 29th, 2003, 9:30am Good Morning Everyone, I have supported Johnnie, my wife for 22 years now. I have watched her go through so much pain with clusters. It has always been so hard for me, I know what she needs and I know when she will get hit before she does. I will never really know the pain, just my pain from watching her. I wake up at night and she isn’t in bed, my heart sinks because I know she is fighting, instead of being able to rest. I woke up last night and found her outside in her swing. I stopped at the corner of the house and listen while she prayed. Johnnie talks to God when she is in pain. Johnnie talks to him like he is sitting right beside her. I sat down in the wet dew and I listened to her. It moved me what she said. I know I was easy dropping and it was a personal prayer, but I have to share this with you. Johnnie said “Lord, I am not the best person in the world by a long shot, but I am not the worst either. I have a lot of things left here on earth to do, this pain in my head is getting in my way. I went years working and never stopped, I have taken every thing with ok you said you wouldn’t give me more than I can deal with, so I am going to deal, and I did. I don't know if I can any more, as the years go by and I get older I am finding it harder to deal. I know I am not to question you, or ask you to heal me. Lord I am asking you to bless the leaders of O.U.C.H. and all people who have clusters. Bless us all and show us the way to get the help we need. Put ideas in our heads to help get the word out. Bless then all, the Doctors, the scientist, the people who work for insurance companies. Help us make them see what we need and must have. If there are others that are in pain as I am, stay close to them and let them know they are not alone. One more thing I need a couple of days off to catch my breath, think you could handle that for me. Amen” I tried to remember this word for word, I am sure there were more but this is what I remember. I put my hand on her hand and we sat together in the misty rain. Her rocking and hurting quietly and I sat there thinking how strong this little woman is and how blessed I am to have her. I was heart broke to know that I couldn’t take the pain from her and fix it. Just something I wanted to share. Maybe some of you can relate to it. |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by Marc on Jun 29th, 2003, 10:00am Nice Buddy, very nice..... We all know she has the strength - especially with you supporting her. Give E a hug from me. Marc |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by jonny on Jun 29th, 2003, 10:33am I know that woman you speak of Buddy, nearly four years ago I washed up here and pissed off alot of people so I left. This chick that I now call E-Baby chased me down and dragged me back......Go figure...now im King of the MB...LMMAO ;D If anyone looks at her sideways in NY ill show them what dancing with the beast really means ;D Nice post, Brother ............................................jonny |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by minnie on Jun 29th, 2003, 10:35am Hi Buddy, sorry to hear Elaines still having so many bouts with the beast.she has given so much support and laughter she's prayed and cried along with many family members on this board.now I will borrow her prayer tonight (modified for a supporter)if she doesn't mind . she's been praying for just about the same things as me. In Elaines true style her prayer is to the point , very giving to others and as classy as Elaine is.She is such a strong and caring person I'm glad she's got someone as special as you in her corner.with all our prayers and vibes heading her way I'm hoping she'll be pain free for a long time. pfdan to all :-* Keep up the good fight elaine. I'm grabbing an oar and rowing with all of you Minnie |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by Donna on Jun 29th, 2003, 11:45am Elaines quite a woman..loved a lot and respected by so many.....she's touch many a soul with her style and class......and she's got quite a man. Got an older brother? |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by TracyS. on Jun 29th, 2003, 11:50am Praise the LORD, Amen! New to the board and suffering but glad to hear others also call on GOD for support. We'll keep her along with all the other suffers in our prayers! She is lucky to have someone strong to support her, keep it up you'll do more then you'll ever know! PF vibes coming her way! :) |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by Jackie on Jun 29th, 2003, 12:51pm Bless your heart, Buddy... :'( Sitting by and watching someone you love suffer is a horrible pain in itself. Listening to that prayer must have torn your heart out. The helpless feeling is almost more than one can bear. Elaine will win this battle too, like she has so many others.....I just pray it's soon. You all are lucky to have each other....love doesn't always cure all but it sure helps. Love and hugs to you and also that very special lady of yours who I'm proud to call my friend. Jacks 8) |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by kim on Jun 29th, 2003, 2:05pm Buddy, me and Brian just read your post together. Brian's eyes filled - we looked at one another- all i can say is Thank You. :) It's incredible. We have never met and you have touched our hearts in a way NO ONE (not even our family) has been able to. Well wishes******* |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by Elaine on Jun 29th, 2003, 2:07pm I am blessed to have you Buddy. I am so blessed, I don't know why! God has been good to me. |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by Charlie on Jun 29th, 2003, 4:01pm Very very nice Buddy. Elaine makes things easier for many others and it's time she gets a break too. Keep plugging and thanks for that, kids Charlie |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by 9erfan on Jun 29th, 2003, 8:18pm WOW! Sounds like you are BOTH blessed to have each other!What a special love you share....Elaine, I'm praying things get better. :) |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by suzy617 on Jun 29th, 2003, 8:28pm That was such a moving post. I held back my tears as I read it. The two of you are really blessed to have each other. Keep kicking ass Elaine! Suzy |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by cootie on Jun 29th, 2003, 9:42pm ahhhhh geeze you guys.....such sweet posts between E and Buddy it got me all choked up.......sounds like a real match made in heaven deal ! PF vibes to ya's......Pam that's tear jerk'd |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by Margi on Jun 30th, 2003, 8:59am Buddy, you're an awesome supporter. I feel your pain - incredibly so. That feeling of helplessness is indescribable to people who are not cluster supporters, isn't it? But I was right there with you, standing at that corner, listening to her prayer, feeling overwhelmed that you were powerless to help her. You really should go to that convention with her, Buddy - it would do YOU the world of good to meet other supporters. We have an unspoken bond between us and, when we meet in person, it's like finding people from our home planet or something. Just like the clusterheads feel - we supporters feel it too. Seriously - try to go to the convention with Elaine this year, Buddy. It's an amazing feeling. Keep up the great work, Buddy - you're doing a wonderful job supporting our angel on earth, our Elaine. Go give her a great big kiss right now and tell her it's from TS. |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by KingOfPain on Jun 30th, 2003, 10:42am :'( That got/moved me. Thank you for the post Buddy. God Bless you both. Feel better soon Lady E. KingOfPain |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by vig on Jun 30th, 2003, 3:19pm wow, we gotta row faster... ...doesn't anybody have an outboard? |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by kellya408 on Jun 30th, 2003, 10:16pm Buddy, I'm new to this site - and a recently diagnosed ch sufferer. Your posting really hit home. I work full time during the day, while attending law school at night and live with my grandmother. I'm in my worst cycle ever, and praying the drugs they prescribed last week work. I feel terrible about what I have put my grandma through the last two months. I panic when I get them and I'm home alone, but when she is home, I feel terrible about her having to watch me in pain and my asking her to stop it - even if she has to kill me. The director at my headache clinic kept calling this (and migraines) a disease, and I would grit my teeth to stop from screaming that "this isn't a disease - its a headache, now get rid of it". But after reading some of the postings, etc. listed on this site, I'm starting to come to terms with it. But its easier knowing I'm not alone. Please give my best to your wife. And bless you for sticking beside her through this. Iwouldn't wish this on my worst enemy - to be a sufferer or supporter. I think my new mantra is turning out to be "I know God (or the powers that be) won't give me anything I can't handle. I just wish they didn't trust me so much". LOL. Thanks for your posting. Kelly :) |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by gene on Jun 30th, 2003, 11:26pm Buddy, I'm also new to the board. I appreciated your post. What struck me the most, was that any human, suffering so greatly, could still have room in their heart to include concern for others. Amazing, she must be a hell of woman/ you must be very proud of her. Kind regards, Gene |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by Elaine on Jun 30th, 2003, 11:38pm Gene, What ya doing up so late? Buddy is a good man and if it wasn't for Him I wouldn't be any good Gene. Buddy and the kids are very overly protective of me, they have a hard time seeing my faults. Maybe they just focus on the good things about me. Its knowing that others hurt as I do and they get through it, if they can I can, its hard not to think of others like me. One of the first things I wonder is who else is fighting the same pain at the same time. I try to think of others and good things when I am getting hit, kind of trying to keep my mind away from the pain. I think my Prayer was more like. Hey look Lord we got to talk. I can take a joke but there a time to get serious. Now you got to help me out here ...so on and so LOL! SUPPORTERS ARE WONDERFUL AREN'T THEY? |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by misserin on Jul 1st, 2003, 1:06am Good evening Elaine and Buddy, I am new to the website and I am so honored to have read of Buddy' s support and your prayer. I hope very much that you are feeling all better, as I say you could certainly "handle" a reprieve!! lots of support, Erin |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by ZAIRA on Jul 1st, 2003, 4:02am Good Morning Buddy :'(, I’m touched for your nice word, thank you, you are a great supporter and your wife is a wonderful person. I always think that life with a CH sufferer is hard such ours the beast… you must be strong as we are with the beast... I think and pray for you and Elaine every day. Much love, Zaira :'( |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by gene on Jul 1st, 2003, 4:15am Hi Elaine, I haven't bothered with the clock, It's only 2:30 here and I'm off tomorrow, I'm fine G |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by Jayne on Jul 1st, 2003, 9:17am Hi there Buddy. Your post brought tears to my eyes. I am so glad Elaine has you! She is one awesome lady. She always bends over backwards for others. Please take care of her for us, we need her around here. And Elaine, you take care of Buddy! Love Jayne |
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Title: Re: A prayer in the mist of a cluster. Post by Leesa on Jul 1st, 2003, 10:08am Buddy, your a wonderful support for E and thanks for your post you really touched my heart sir. Elaine is a wonderful lady that I love dearly. Your both very lucky to have each other. May God bless you both and keep you safe. Elaine, give that man a hug from me he's a good cookie in the cookie jar of life as you are also. I hope you both find some PF time very soon. Yall are in my prayers daily. Hey E, we got some dancin to do gal!! ;) Hope to meet you Buddy at one of the conventions and Elaine, I got us a BIG table to dance on gal. Love to you both, Leesa |
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