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        New Message Board Archives >> 2003 Posts >> Any one have a Fucking cluster?
        
(Message started by: Elaine on Jun 12^th, 2003, 8:36pm)

Title: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Elaine on Jun 12^th, 2003, 8:36pm

I know I been getting hit fairly bad lately !
I been trying to keep up with who is in cycle!
I know one thing tonight, i am feeling pertty lost !
I am seeing a lot of the floor these days, and sheading a tear or two at night now. I hate these Fuckers I hate them. I don't know where to go any more.

Title: ERe: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Edna on Jun 12^th, 2003, 8:39pm

ELAINE........deary you've come to the right place.

You know your family here would do anything for you......sorry it's so bad dear lady.....and praying for quick relief for you.

Hugs,
EDNA (check your mail)

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by 9erfan on Jun 12^th, 2003, 8:39pm

:-[ You're in my thoughts Elaine. I feel your desperation! I HATE THEM TOO!!

As far as me...still chronic...they've been pretty mild since a couple days before Mother's Day. Thank God! They're about 9 hrs apart and I'll take it if that's the best I can get.

I hope they end for you soon! That damn BASTARD!

V.

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by catlind on Jun 12^th, 2003, 8:42pm

I hear ya Elaine, I have a major problem with this fucking beast!!!! Wish he would go away forever for all of us!

I'm thinking of you and sending you all kinds of positive pain free vibes!! Anything you need just ask!

Cat

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by badfly on Jun 12^th, 2003, 9:31pm

Elaine Im really sorry to hear you are having a damn tough time lately. I am around cluster peak right now, and also having a hard time. BUT I know things will get better! We just gotta take it one hit at a time, one day at a time. Know that this WILL end. Hang in there and think positive thaughts of what you will do when you are finaly PF. Thinking of you and wishing you PFDAN !!

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by jimbo on Jun 12^th, 2003, 10:20pm

Elaine,

Sorry you getting hit right now and having a rough time. :'( I'll be praying for the beast to leave you alone! Hang in there.

Peace,

Jimbo

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Roxy on Jun 12^th, 2003, 10:26pm

You came to the right place E......this is where you need to be when you're hurting. Wish I could take some of the hits for you.....I'd do it in a heartbeat.

Don't feel lost....there are many of us walking with you!

Love,
Tracey

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Linda_Howell on Jun 12^th, 2003, 10:29pm

E,

I've been "IN CYCLE " for the last 11 yrs. At the beginning and at the end of every fucking HA I think of all of you guys out there. In the middle of one however, I'm too busy screaming and writhing in pain to think of anything. When I think of all of you though, it's like one huge group of people in the back of my mind, cheering me on and hating this beast as much as me.

Don't feel alone hon. Please. Linda

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Mastifflvr28 on Jun 13^th, 2003, 12:07am

E, you KNOW who and where your friends are.

Fight sweety, like we know you can.

Good days are coming ahead, fer sure!!

VIBES MY FRIEND
Mast

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Svenn on Jun 13^th, 2003, 1:48am

You know who your friends are Elaine.
Just lean on one of us or all.
We are here for you as you have been for us.
A lot of positive wibes on the way to you my friend

Svenn

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by ave on Jun 13^th, 2003, 3:18am

We've all been there: either we had the cluster or we had to stand by and see somebody we cared for suffer, like now, with you.

You are anything but alone, so keep up that head of yours, hang in there; what would we do without you, girl!

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by echo on Jun 13^th, 2003, 8:03am

Sorry you're being hit E. Seems like we are doing the dance together these days. I just wish the beast would quit leading.

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by oringkid on Jun 13^th, 2003, 8:09am

Hang in there E,

Sending you 5 more pf hours to use whenever you need them!

Sherry

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Spindrift on Jun 13^th, 2003, 8:12am

Sending waves of support. I and everyone else here know how horrible you're feeling. You are never alone.
SD

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by cbolony on Jun 13^th, 2003, 8:19am

Elaine sorry that you are getting hit so hard.I only wish i can take those fucken CH off your hands for a few weeks so you can be PF.And mean it

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by CJohnson on Jun 13^th, 2003, 8:30am

I don't know that I've had a fucking cluster, but I did once get hit while administering cunnilingus. :)
Sorry. Hope you feel better soon. I'm not in cycle, but I would take a couple of your headaces, if it was possible. Not just out of human compassion, but also out of respect for the might contributions you have made to help so many CH sufferers. I'm pretty new here, but one doesn't have to pay too close attention to see how much you mean to everyone.

PFDANs
-Curtis

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Margi on Jun 13^th, 2003, 8:40am

Hey TS....
nope - I've never had one. But I get one in my heart when I hear you're hurting like this.
So, feel me there with you, sending you strength to fight. Kick it's ass, darlin - like we all know you can.
Hugs

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Elaine on Jun 13^th, 2003, 11:15am

I am just pissed off cause I been feeling so good now for so long, and the damn things are back. I don't even know if they are back for good as a chronic or back just for a couple of months. I thought for sure I would get a couple of years off. I will get use to it all again. I would reather be a chronic than a eposodic. I always said ya'll had it worst, now I know you do. To be pain free for months and even years then get hit its harder than getting hit everyday, at least thats what I think after having it both ways. I will be ok ! I am just sitting on my pity pot, I will flush soon ;-)!

I know you guys are here. Maybe the sun will come out soon and all us that is getting hit will be PF ! We will give all the supporters a rest.

I would love to come to this board one day and find no anger, no pain, no cluster post , no bad news post. It would be nice to wake up no one in any type of pain and this board full of "Praise God", and lots of laughter, hugs, and lots of good news. I pray for this everyday I turn on the news LOL!

Come to think of it this board is like the news LOL! Think about it. We have hate crimes, gossipe, laughter, deaths, music, health, vacations, we even get weather reports here. LOL! Best damn news on the web is right here. :-)!!!!!

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by catlind on Jun 13^th, 2003, 11:21am

Lady E, I do not know how on earth being episodic could ever be worse than being chronic! I have never been chronic so I guess I can't compare, but I know my HA will end, and I know my cycle will end, and in the between times it's all a distant memory.

Of course when they come back it comes with force, and you have to go through the "will it ever end" thing again. I just can't imagine having that awful pain everyday of my life. I truly do not think I could ever survive being chronic. I live in terror of that!

You are one very strong lady :)

Cat

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Roxy on Jun 13^th, 2003, 11:34am

on 06/13/03 at 11:15:10, Elaine wrote:

I would reather be a chronic than a eposodic. I always said ya'll had it worst, now I know you do. To be pain free for months and even years then get hit its harder than getting hit everyday, at least thats what I think after having it both ways. I

I'm so glad you said this Elaine. I've tried to explain this to some people on the phone, and they just tell me I'm crazy. I only had a week PF (the PF time was do to shroom treatment), but when they came back........my heart just broke for all the episodics out there. I finally had an idea of what they went through, and it is a hellacious, horrible feeling. It sounds somewhat crazy to say you'd take being chronic, but in some twisted, bizarre way......chronic seems a little better than forgeting what they feel like, and then being slammed upside the head and reminded.

I KNOW most of the other chronics won't agree with me......this is just my take on it. I think we, as chronics, do build up a tolerance to it, and we learn to live day in and day out with them, to function as normally as we can around the ch's.

JMHO,
Tracey

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Jim R on Jun 13^th, 2003, 11:42am

So sorry to hear you are getting hit, Lady E. My best to you and my strongest prayers and hopes for the pain to stop for you. - Jim R

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Elaine on Jun 13^th, 2003, 11:51am

I guess its the fact when I get hit there will be months that its not a 10 each time. Its just enough to let me know he still has me in his power he is still there. Then the pain will increse for a moth or two, every attack will be a 10. Then it slows down kind of like he is getting tired, then when you think you have beat him he comes back for more. We have breaks or at least I did, but it was never total pain free breaks. I tell you what I sure as hell enjoyed being pain free these last few months. It was fun ;-)

Its kind of like you never tasted ice crean and someone says here have a lick...hmmm it was so good you just wanted more. Then you find you can't have any more.
Oh well so is life right!

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by ZAIRA on Jun 13^th, 2003, 1:19pm

on 06/12/03 at 20:36:21, Elaine wrote:

Elaine, there is no day in wich I don’t think of you, you know that you are an exemple for us all.
Every night I pray God to give you the force to overcome also these moments of sadness...
I love you Milady. :)

Zaira

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by jonny on Jun 13^th, 2003, 1:58pm

on 06/13/03 at 11:34:09, Roxy wrote:

I KNOW most of the other chronics won't agree with me......this is just my take on it. I think we, as chronics, do build up a tolerance to it, and we learn to live day in and day out with them, to function as normally as we can around the ch's.

Agreed!

Hang in there, E!!

..........................jonny

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Live4Fun on Jun 13^th, 2003, 4:08pm

Hang in there Elaine! I'm not a chronic but I am getting hit right now too. PF thoughts your way!!! -- Bryan

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Mark C on Jun 13^th, 2003, 5:06pm

Gosh yall,
I ain't sure what's worse. ECH sucks in that you do get reminded just how bad this shit really hurts. I could not imagine living with this pain every day! I would wind up as silly as jonny ! ;D ;D

I am almost grateful for being ECH....I think it was Ueli who just celebrated (?) over 1500 days without a break. As tough as I like to think I am, the mere thought of daily attacks fills my heart with terror. God bless all the chronics....you poor bastards.

PFDAN's
Mark

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by ab15 on Jun 13^th, 2003, 5:57pm

I'm fortunately not chronic, but I'm in a cluster now, on the tail-end. Best wishes and I hope you're PF soon.

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by KingOfPain on Jun 13^th, 2003, 7:19pm

Lady Elaine,

Please hang in there, we are all here for you & hoping for some pain free days ahead for you.

If ya need me, I'm here.

Me, the insomniac, am up alot at strange hours.
I will keep checking in at the board to make sure in the event you (or anyone else) might need some company or at least an ear to vent to.

*Note to beast............leave Lady E the f alone!!! >:(
As a matter of fact beast, you *!#%^$#%~,
leave us all alone!

KingOfPain

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Live4Fun on Jun 13^th, 2003, 10:40pm

on 06/13/03 at 17:06:46, Mark C wrote:

As tough as I like to think I am, the mere thought of daily attacks fills my heart with terror. God bless all the chronics....you poor bastards.

AMEN!!!

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Charlie on Jun 13^th, 2003, 10:51pm

Rats E. Sorry

Sorry I missed this thread too. Keep up the good fight kid.

Charlie

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Elaine on Jun 14^th, 2003, 9:45am

KOP I slept all night last night!!! I took a sleeping pill and a amerage I found last night. I didn't wake up till 9 this morning, even the baby slept all night. Buddy slept with the baby for me. I have energy today. I am going to go get my nails done then out to eat with Buddy and then to a karoka party. I don't sing I just listen. LOL!

Charlie I got a great big hug waitting for you, I am giving you at the convention! KOP you have one coming to !

Roxy and Michelle, got to room with me so you two are in deep crap ya'll got to put up with me.

Thanks all for the vibes and Prayers I got some sleep so maybe I won't be venting now for awile.

Good luck to all of you getting hit, my prayers and thoughts are coming your way. Email me if you need to vent, I am here for any of ya.

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by Jayne on Jun 14^th, 2003, 11:12am

Sorry you are geeting hit too Doll!
I wonder if it's the bloody weather here in the South??
As I said...grasping at straws

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by badpunkchick on Jun 14^th, 2003, 12:28pm

hey e...

i'm sorry to hear that... it will get better soon... but if you don't see an end in sight try some pot... it's the only preventitive drug i've taken that works.

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by jonny on Jun 14^th, 2003, 12:31pm

on 06/14/03 at 12:28:35, badpunkchick wrote:

hey e...

i'm sorry to hear that... it will get better soon... but if you don't see an end in sight try some pot... it's the only preventitive drug i've taken that works.

Hmmmmmm!!!

............................jonny

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by don on Jun 14^th, 2003, 12:39pm

Quote:

i'm sorry to hear that... it will get better soon... but if you don't see an end in sight try some pot... it's the only preventitive drug i've taken that works.

WTF ?

What others have you tried might I ask?

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by badpunkchick on Jun 14^th, 2003, 12:54pm

all the others were percription... beta blockers, steriods. depakote, anti-depresants, etc. my dotor told me to keep smoking pot if it helps... but i really can't because i live on campus and it would get me fired from my job... so i only do it when i'm at my mom's place and i know i don't have to work for a while (which is once ever 2-3 months)... i find it helps prevent them for anywhere between a few days and a week... that or if i'm at a party and i want to drink without getting a headache, a few hits will prevent it.

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by don on Jun 14^th, 2003, 1:04pm

Would that be the same Doc that prescribed the anti-depressants ?

The active ingredient in Marijuana is a chemical identified as delta-9-tetrahydrocannabinol, or THC. It is drug that is classified as both a depressant and a mild hallucinogenic chemical. It will also prevent the breakdown of anti dpressants so that the theraputic value becomes questionable.

Same Doc?

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by badpunkchick on Jun 14^th, 2003, 1:21pm

yeah.. it was my primary care dr.... but it's not like this was all in one visit. the pot suggestion was a year before i got severely depressed due to the worst ch in my life last fall. i wasn't smoking pot or drinking while i was on antidepresants... i know better.

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by 2late on Jun 14^th, 2003, 1:25pm

sorry to hear it E, i'm gettin' slammed also, best of luck to you for some relief! ..............Jack

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by jonny on Jun 14^th, 2003, 1:27pm

The hole gets deeper.....LMMFAO ;D

...................................jonny

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by don on Jun 14^th, 2003, 1:38pm

Are you seeing a neuro now? What meds are you taking to prevent and/or abort?

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by badpunkchick on Jun 14^th, 2003, 2:12pm

i'm seeing one of the best neuro's in my area... i'm not taking anything for preventative right now... i tried a bunch last year and they either made me worse or did jack shit... so i try to stay away from triggers like stress, liquor, ciggaretts as much as possible and eat healthy and exercise very often... but that isn't 100% helpful... so i have my 5mg nasal spray and when my nose gets too runny to use that i got the 6mg injectable stuff... i'm doing ok, but i plan on hitting up my neuro for o2 sooner or later.

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by kim on Jun 14^th, 2003, 4:51pm

Elaine you hang tough sista!

Pot for a cluster? No thanks. ;D

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by nancyc on Jun 14^th, 2003, 7:24pm

Aw, Sis, I am hurting for you...to go without that pain and for it to come back, is a real bitch. I know the feeling. To feel like maybe you had beat the beast at his game for good this time only to find out different. To feel life and to have the beast snatch it away again, hurts so bad...know I love you and you are always in my thoughts and prayers....and only a phone call away. smiles, nancyc PS..one thing I do know today is that there are lots of angels here at ch.com!

Title: Re: Any one have a Fucking cluster?
Post by PINKY BABY on Jun 14^th, 2003, 10:03pm

yea, i am her with ys. hang in there. i am sorry you are getting hit so hard. i wish we could take your pain.
pinky