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        New Message Board Archives >> 2003 Posts >> Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
        
(Message started by: Ree on Jun 8^th, 2003, 9:49pm)

Title: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by Ree on Jun 8^th, 2003, 9:49pm

IMHO~~~ I respect the lurkers....... quite frankly if everyone that is registered here started posting frequently where would we all be... it says we have 4163 members... I think we would all get lost in the shuffle and wouldnt be able to figure a damn thing out... As it stands now alot of posts have 3-4 pages and we cant get through the jist of a posts... most posts loose their true meaning after one page ... Imagine if 4163 people posted to a single post...
again God Bless you Lurkers... I love you especially you Bill LOL HI ......... ree

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by brain_cramps on Jun 8^th, 2003, 10:11pm

I can't figure out why anyone would have a problem with lurkers. Afterall, I'd bet that AT LEAST 90% of us were lurkers before posting the first time.

Additionally, I know a few people that lurk to get "caught up on the board" because they don't necessarily have enough time to "stop and chat with everyone". Others are reading while at work and might not want to get caught.

Here, as well as in life, a lot of people are "quieter" than others. That doesn't mean that they are any less "good".

For example, if someone chooses to sit by themself in the bar, should that piss off the other patrons? Hopefully not. It should be up to the individual. Maybe that individual WANTS to be alone or is just wasting some time. (not that I sit in the bar alone ;))

Don't see what the problem is about,
grant ::)

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by Roxy on Jun 9^th, 2003, 8:42am

I agree with you Ree.

The lurkers are here for a reason, whether they are drawing something they need from the board, or just interested in what is going on.....there is a reason that they come here and read.

I know there are some older board members that people would like to see return, and those board members should take that as a compliment.....people miss them and would like to see them around.

I have been known to lurk when I'm busy......if I'm working at the computer, but don't sign in......then I'm not tempted to post when I should be doing other things....... ;D Sometimes it works, and then sometimes it doesn't.... ::)

Tracey

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by Margi on Jun 9^th, 2003, 9:22am

Good point, Ree. I think we're already at that point that it's too much to sift through anymore and THAT single fact is what causes a lot of folks to "lurk" instead of signing in every time. I only ever sign in if I'm going to post - I don't necessarily want everyone to know how much time I actually DO spend reading the board. LOL So....call me a lurker then.

I think if we attack the lurkers, we're defeating the purpose here. Take, for example, someone showing up here, feeling suicidal. What if they just didn't feel like talking but needed to validate the feelings they were having? They could probably do that by reading some of the buttons on the left, or reading one of the other threads where someone else was at the end of their rope? Where is it written that every single person who shows up here needs to say something? *NEWSFLASH* DJ is the ONLY person who can dictate rules here, gang. What if that one suicidal lurker came across the lurker-dissing? Do we really want to be responsible for the consequences?

As to folks leaving when they're not in cycle...some people just don't want to THINK about clusters if they don't have to. That's not a crime and shouldn't be treated as one. Some folks want to stay and shmooz. That's cool too. Then there are those that are commited for life here, continuing the research and support. Hat's off to those tireless folks. But - it takes all types of people to make the world go round. If we were all the same type of person this would be a pretty boring place.

One last thing and then I'll climb down off my soapbox here ::) I think the role of the oldtimer is evolving here finally (or maybe I'm suggesting that it should). I see the majority of the oldtimers becoming custodians and guides here - watching out for that newbie that is hitting the wall, offering our years of research to folks arriving here who think they've tried everything but maybe we can offer just one more option. Yeah, so what if someone arrives here asking if anyone is left-handed (or any other such subject that we've previously turned inside out)? What does it take to write a few short FRIENDLY sentences to post the results of our research? I think the perceived 'clique' mentalilty would disappear if we all just took a breath and kept this all in perspective. Yes, some of us are lifelong friends, and we like to play. That doesn't necessarily mean we don't want NEW friends, ok? This is a group for clusterheads and their supporters. If you fall into either category, you are immediately welcomed into the family. If you're not - you're not. Such is life at ch.com.

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by Ree on Jun 9^th, 2003, 9:30am

MARGI YOU ARE THE BOMB... EXACTLY... LURKERS... LURK ON AND WELCOME..........BUT DONT EVER BE AFRAID TO JUMP IN AT ANY TIME AND I MEAN ANY TIME.......
Those Clusterheads that are out of cycle... good for you... Congratulations... but dont feel that you cant come back if you have been away... !
I have never forgotten who is in charge here....... DJ!!!
This is his baby........... and think about it he only posts when HE has something important to say... Everyone with Cluster Headaches is welcome here... and those that support them. Welcome Lurkers............LURK ON...
BE COOL IF YOU WOULD JUST INTRODUCE YOURSELVES THOUGH...LOVE TO YOU REE...........

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by Deborah on Jun 9^th, 2003, 10:09am

Yea, I am a long time lurker. I confess. ::) Nobody probably even remembers me, but I have been observing the board for a couple of years now. When I found this board, I had been diagnosed with cluster headaches, but my headaches kept getting worse and I was experiencing very strange symptoms. I went to the chat room, met Elaine (such a wonderful woman), and spoke with other wonderful folk who did their best to help me. I was having clusters and typical migraines with auras and began having seizure type symptoms, etc. So after two MRIs and several visits to my new neurologist, it was determined that I had lots of brain lesions and was diagnosed with having Multiple Sclerosis. It was also determined that the headaches I was having were definitely migraines related to these brain lesions. I am now being treated with Topamax daily, Axert (as needed), and Pamelor nightly as a sleep aid. For the past three months, I have been headache free.

I have been hesitant to post. Nobody really wants to hear from a migraine sufferer. I have always tried to be nice to everyone, but being nice does not mean that you will be treated nice in return. That is my reason for lurking. And that is the end of my story.

Hoping for pain free days and nights for everyone.

Deborah

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by catlind on Jun 9^th, 2003, 11:19am

Margi, so very very well said!!! Thanks for starting this thread Ree :)

I agree with everything said. To each his/her own, and if we help a lurker that's awesome, but I disagree with negativity towards any CH'ers. I think it defeats our purpose of helping each other out.

That's my 2 cents worth.

Cat

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by Peppermint on Jun 9^th, 2003, 11:22am

on 06/09/03 at 08:42:21, Roxy wrote:

Very good points Tracey.

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by oringkid on Jun 9^th, 2003, 12:22pm

Another great post! Good goin' Ree and Margi and Tracey.

My reason for NOT lurking (besides being a blabbermouth lol) I can't figure out what posts I've read and what ones I haven't and which ones have new posts without the little [NEW] tags! I'm somewhat anal and analytical and just love to go through and clear (by reading) each and every little [NEW] tagged post.

(and what drives me absolutely batshit is the first post. The stickied one on trials. The little [NEW] tag WON'T go away!!! ARRRGGHH!)

Sherry

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by Donna on Jun 9^th, 2003, 12:32pm

Deborah.........

Thanks for adding your circumstances and feelings.

I am sorry that you are suffering and wish that we could do something to help ease what you are going through.

Naturally you won't find advice here on your medical condition, but you certainly have my prayers and well wishes.

When I say hello to the lurkers from now on, you will certainly be included.

Thanks for letting us hear from you again.

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by GlendaB on Jun 9^th, 2003, 1:21pm

Okay, I'll introduce myself. I'm a lurker....And my name is Glenda. I've been here for a couple of years now, some of you already know me or know of me. I am not a big talker and just don't say much. I read the MB at least once a day if not more. I am an episodic sufferer and am currently out of cycle. I don't post because I have seen how some of the newbies and others have had "not so nice" things said to them. Some of the people on this MB have made some of us lurkers. We would rather just read post and lurk in the background than have to deal with the rude comments. I, myself, feel if you can't say something nice, keep your rude comments to yourself! Why do you have to even open your mouth! If you don't like someone, just don't talk to them! Isn't that easy enough.

Besides, there are a lot of things taken totally out of context of what the person actually meant. There are so many ways to read something....keep in mind that text is just that, text and there is no body lauguage or emotion to go along with it to help a person interpret.

I consider myself to be a good and kind person and wouldn't intentionally say anything to hurt or offend anyone. I just don't understand why some people like to hurt or offend people.

I'm sorry, like I said, I usually keep my mouth shut but thought I would stick my two-cents worth in this time. I will go back to lurking in the background now.

Love and PFDAN to all.

Glenda

Title: Welcome Lurkers
Post by Opus on Jun 9^th, 2003, 5:15pm

Deborah and Glenda,
Can I ask a question, Do you view the board logged in? Would you answer a PM? In my opinion answering yes to these questions means you are a member not a lurker. In my view a Lurker views the board as a guest so no one can tell they are there. If you are logged in then everyone knows you are there, you just aren't posting. Does this mean anything? I thought it would when I started but now I am not sure.

If you don't want to post because of unwelcome responses but you e-mail or PM someone in need then you are not a lurker but someone who supports behind the scenes.

Anyway because you both are new to me

http://www.imgmag.org/images/sunny22/Gifs/Welcome.gif

Opus/Paul

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by Ree on Jun 9^th, 2003, 5:24pm

DEBORAH ... God Bless and welcome... Glenda Hey... good for you to finally post... I knew if we asked nicely that we would get a few to post... its a start but again no one should ever feel pressured to post...love to you both and again thanks for posting... ree

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by GlendaB on Jun 9^th, 2003, 6:22pm

Hi Opus!

To answer your question; honestly, I usually don't log in unless I post. And, yes if I received a IM I would definitely answer, unless it was someone IM'ing me with a smart comment, those I choose to ignore. I do the majority of my supporting by e-mail.

I would post more if it wasn't for the smart comments. I guess I'm not the only one who feels this way.

Love and PFDAN to all!

Glenda

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by badfly on Jun 9^th, 2003, 6:22pm

CONFESSION OF A HABITUAL SUPPORTER

I found this site 4 years ago! Since then I have participated and posted on four seperate occasions. When I say occasions, I mean for about a month or two each time. The first time I found this site was when I finally had a name for my afliction and and typed those magic words into the internet. You cannot imagine my relief and surprise (well probably most of you can lol)when I found this site and realised I wasnt crazy, dying or a hyperchondriact. That first week I got armed with information and a better understanding of CH then any doctor or Neuro could ever have given me. I posted some pertinent questions and got the answers I needed. I NEVER posted replys to others question or near sucidal rants because I didnt feel knowlegeable or strong enough myself to do this!
Every year since then I come back (somtimes I lurk out of cycle too, but rarly post), but never remeber my username and password (I change my PC every couple of months) and usually just make a new one. As I have become more knowelgable I feel more confident and post a bit more. Grrr I'm am rambeling ....
What I wanted to say is this: This board has saved my life. There is no doubt about it. However no one here today can take credit for it (besides DJ! Charlie and Margi have been a great help ;-)) The members here were not around then when I needed them, there were othere's there at the time. People come and go, that is the nature of a forum. When people feel they need to help others, they will! When people need help they will come here! For some of you this place can feel like a family, but for others, like me, it is just a really good tool. I have a hard enough time keeping my own family together and food on the table without having to spend further hours logged into this forum to support other people. Dont get me wrong, when I am here, I try to be as supportive as possable, and I do pop in out of cycle occasionally, and would definatly reply to a suicidal or near suicidal poist IMEDIATLY.
Does that make me a bad person? No way! Does that make anyone else here a better person then me? Who can tell.
BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU SAY HERE AS HUNDRED OF ANONYMOUS PEOPLE ARE READING WHAT YOU WRITE !! DO NOT DIS THEM FOR NOT DOING WHAT YOU DO !! YOU DO NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO DO THAT !! YOU ARE BEING JUDJMENTAL !!

Well thats my 2c

PS special thanks to DJ (huge respect) Charlie, Margi, Elain, Drummer, John, TraceyC, Ninnett, Flash, Pink "somthing or outher"(lol the shroom fundi) and so many others that are not here any more or who unfortunatly I have forgotten the names of.

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by jonny on Jun 9^th, 2003, 6:37pm

on 06/09/03 at 18:22:54, badfly wrote:

However no one here today can take credit for it (besides DJ! Charlie and Margi have been a great help ;-)) The members here were not around then when I needed them

LMAO....What a joke that is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;D

You talk out you ass my friend!!

...........................jonny

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by badfly on Jun 9^th, 2003, 6:55pm

Always with the flame huh ?
Its ok to flame, Troll, or just be humorous, BUT

1) If you gonna flame, DONT call me freind !
2) Dont think your helping, cos your not !

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by jonny on Jun 9^th, 2003, 7:06pm

on 06/09/03 at 18:55:51, badfly wrote:

2) Dont think your helping, cos your not !

Tell that to the family members that ive helped!

..................................jonny ;D

Heres a modify for ya.

Who the fuck have you helped?.....LMMFAO ;D

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by Margi on Jun 9^th, 2003, 7:07pm

Hi Badfly...ok, now you gotta PM me and tell me what other name we'd recognize you by? This will drive me nuts ALL night! LOL
Glad to hear you've gotten some help here. What you say is very profound, actually. At the last convention, I had a lovely gal come up to me who knew almost every post I'd ever made and just wanted to say hi in person. I honestly had never heard her name before - but she sure knew me (mouthy, wordy broad that I am!)
We sometimes forget that we're not just talking to a room full of people who answer back. We have a much larger audience than we realize.
Ask Bill Lovejoy - that guy can cite posts back to the early days. Not that there's anything wrong with that....even though it is a lil creepy, right Mast? LOL ;)
just kiddin Bill - rock on, my friend. Or should I say: LURK on. Same to you, Badfly.

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by badfly on Jun 9^th, 2003, 11:37pm

Margi
He he if I could remember my username, I wouldnt have to make a new one each time. Passwords are also a bit problimatic though. In August 1999 (I think the date is right or it may have been later) I came to the board (the old one) and posted as "John-o", "John_o" or somthing thereabout. I asked questions about Prednisone, O2 and the water treatment. Sometime in September 2000 (again not piositive about the date) I came onto the board as "Gadfly". "Barfly" or some variation thereof. I was at my wits end. I had lost my Job. The prednisone wasnt helping at all. Imitrex injections were not available at the time, and my Neuro said I would just have to "tuff it out". My father had passed away a few months earlier and I had been drafted into the army for some months (this information I dont think I had given out). I was alone in a foreign country, couldnt speak the language well, had no family around I could turn to and was single. I posted a desperate plea for help somthing along the lines of "I'm an athiest, dont believe in God and an afterlife, I have nothing to live for and why should I continue to suffer if i can just end this". Imediatly 10's of people posted encouraging remarks and told me to hang on. One women in Israel (where I was living) E-Mailed me and begged me to let her come and visit me. (It turns out that her ex-husband had been a chronic sufferer and had passed away some years earlier). I had a M-16 from the army at he time and had sat for hours with it between my legs trying to build the courage. Well she came to see me and helped me through the lowest point in my life (NB: She was a Lurker).
About 13 months ago I was back at the forum posting. My wife had just given birth to my son. I was in mid cycle and a mess. I remember saying I had had an attack in the delivery room. People encouraged me and again told me to dig in and I would make it. I think you were one of them Margi, and TracyC (not sure about the C part, but some tracy) , but I cant be positive. My memory is pretty poor and I spend ALOT of my time on MANY newsgroups (most of them work related). About 8 Months ago I was taking a trip to Amsterdamn and began asking questions about shrooms. People were very helpful, unfortunatly just before departure I had another family tragedy and never went. (Ninnet thanx anyway).

Johnny
My last note on this matter: Ill rephrase my numbered statment to make it clearer.

Always with the flame huh ?
Its ok to flame, Troll, or just be humorous, BUT if you gonna flame, DONT call me freind !
Its ok to flame or troll BUT dont think THAT is helping ME, cos its not !

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by pimmony on Jun 10^th, 2003, 2:13am

I wish I felt it was family.

I lurk because I owe a great deal to people who helped me when I was confused and in a lot of pain. I try to return the support in the wings.

I sometimes feel totally alone and at those times I badly need the contact and the internet is a wonderful place for that. I believe that a lot of people feel like that and I hope that just a little kindness extended here and there will provide a little warmth that makes a day better.

The adverse is also true. If you are unkind you can make it a very black place for a gentle soul.

I think that a lot of the time I just feel invisible.

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by Margi on Jun 10^th, 2003, 8:34am

First of all John (Badfly) - I do remember you. I'm sorry you've been having such a bumpy ride these last few years. I hope things are looking brighter?

And, Pimmony - good post. "If you are unkind you can make it a very black place for a gentle soul." VERY true. I hope you've been able to identify the kindness here - because there really CAN be a lot of it.

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by BobG on Jun 10^th, 2003, 8:40am

John Badfly........are you the John that had Pig In Space for e-mail?

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by badfly on Jun 10^th, 2003, 8:56am

Margi
I thaught you might. Im still here and have decided to "grab an oar and row !". Since my son was born I have more to fight for and that has been a help.

BobG
No, thats not me. I have mail at londom.net and londom.org both mailbox's under the user name john.

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by BobG on Jun 10^th, 2003, 9:05am

My memory must be slipping.

Wonder what John that was ???

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by Margi on Jun 10^th, 2003, 9:17am

oh THANKS, Bob. I remember that email addy too. This is going to drive me crazy ALL day now (and...uh...it's not a long drive, ok?)
yeah, THANKS Bob.

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by Ree on Jun 10^th, 2003, 1:14pm

What is scarey about this guy making names up each time he comes here is the fact that we thing CH.com is huge now its probably the Badfly over and over and over........... hehe...
... and back to my philosophy of getting more with Honey I have had a few new people post merely because I asked nicely and told them to be welcome... another point for the side of good... be nice jonny!
love me

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by jonny on Jun 10^th, 2003, 6:11pm

on 06/10/03 at 13:14:31, Ree wrote:

be nice jonny!

ME?.......Im always nice ;D

..............................jonny :D

Title: Re: Rees very own hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Post by Woobie on Jun 10^th, 2003, 6:36pm

HI BILL!!!!!

;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Tina :-*

(i'm Back!!!)