|
||
|
Title: Through my eyes... Post by cathy on Apr 8th, 2003, 4:54pm Most of you know Im a supporter not a sufferer.....this is how I felt when wes got hit the other night, which means the beast is back...it was also inspired by a friend who is a sufferer who asked what is it like to be on the other side...... I glance at the clock it's 2am He's got that hollow look in his eyes again Sadness, terror, haunting horror For the beast has returned in his head to burrow Out of our bed his right eye exploding While the beast's latest dance begins it's unfolding He's quickly reduced to a mass of flesh Banging his head with his fists no re-dress The cries, the groans, harrowing yells from the soul Where the beast takes him, god only knows A minutes an hour..... I can only wait For this thing that lives with us to slowly abate Each time the beast visits, without an invite I kneel down and pray he'll find strength for the fight My heart feels it's ripped from my very being Noone should go through this hell that he's living Im angry, helpless, frustrated and sad Why should a human being suffer this bad Through his pain I hear him say "Please god, just take me, make the pain go away" Again and again I can hear his calls "I just can't take this anymore" I don't give an answer, for who am I to say That he should live with this for another day.......(but he will and he does) It's 2.40am he begins to stop pacing Dries his tears while his heart stops racing But the look of despair is always the same Cos he knows a few hours till the beast comes again We glance at each other, there's no need for words We're both fully aware that the beast has been heard So life while he visits is partly our own If you excuse the odd rocking, headbangs and groans Cathy |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by Edna on Apr 8th, 2003, 5:05pm THANK YOU FRIEND!!!!! check your mail cathy when you write about the words Wes utters during an attack.......girl, it hits a big ole nerve here..... :'( ........knowing that's some of the same things that come from my mouth during an attack, just kinda helps put things in a perspective that in a weird way helps......knowing once more that someone here feels the same things I do during an attack, only helps me know more that I AM NOT ALONE!!!!!!! wishing many pf moments for wes right now, and warm hugs for you, EDNA |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by CathiP on Apr 8th, 2003, 5:23pm Cathy- That's nice.....no horrific......and touching, and raw, and somehow tender. Wes is lucky to have you there with him, and I am sorry either one of you must deal with these visits. A friend of mine, who is a sufferer uses terms like "night crawler", and "exquisite pain"........if I didn't get it before, I did when I got those terms, and now, your prose. For tonight, I hope there are no visits, no pain, no anguish....just peace. Cathi |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by brain_cramps on Apr 8th, 2003, 5:25pm no words... :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by cootie on Apr 8th, 2003, 6:34pm Wow Cathy that was great....gave me goosebumps !!! I'm so sorry ta hear Wes is gettin hit again dam it....seems I have read on here where others have went thru hospital visits for surgery's whatever and got hit soon after even if it wasn't due for there cycle. I was hopein that wouldn't happen to you guys esp since Wes can't take the same meds now...hope you can work around that with the docs and he get some relief that works and be able to face all this a bit better or better then 'without' !!! Love to you girl and keep us posted Pam |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by Ree on Apr 8th, 2003, 10:16pm Cathy you have truly captured that feeling, a feeling I try to put away every time our cycle has ended here. So deep in the recesses of your inner most being have those feelings brewed until you could at last put them on paper in a tribute so real... Your words are beautiful. I too write poetry... and kids stories. It is a wonderful way to let out feelings... Thank you so much for sharing. Our family is sooooooooo sooooooo gifted... you my friend are one of those gifts... love Ree |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by Callico_Kid on Apr 8th, 2003, 10:27pm I'm sorry! You put it so well. We ch'ers put you supporters through the wringer as well. Sometimes it is as hard tosit with someone else and "feel" the pain right along with them, but still cannot quite share it. You both are in our prayers. Thanks for the support you give to us as well as to Wes. jc P.S. I think the beauty of love is that God designed it in such a way that it is more truly expressed in bad times than in the good. |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by don on Apr 9th, 2003, 12:03am That one even got to me. |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by fubar on Apr 9th, 2003, 12:09am Some days I really appreciate the fact that, unlike myself, some people aren't artistically disabled (I have a certificate to prove it but it doesn't get me the good parking spaces) Well done. I swear I didn't get choked up and that's my story and I'm sticking to it. -Fu |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by Scotty_Dog on Apr 9th, 2003, 1:03am What can I say but thankyou. My wife can relate to your nights of watching. The greatest pain is seeing your loved one trying to help. You and yours are in my prayers. |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by ZAIRA on Apr 9th, 2003, 7:01am Thanks Cathy :-*, you are a special friend and a wonderful supporter for Wes and for all us. How we can go on without you… In Italy to people like you we say "Ti voglio bene"… there is no translation into English… it is “I love you” told with affection to a special friend. So… “I love you” Cathy!! Thanks for you support that you transmit to all these clusteheads. Zaira :-* |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by TomM on Apr 9th, 2003, 7:55am Wow! That sums it up for sure. Excellent piece. Thank you for sharing. |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by Mark C on Apr 9th, 2003, 7:57am :'( |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by TomM on Apr 9th, 2003, 8:04am BTW--love da shoes! ;) |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by Roxy on Apr 9th, 2003, 9:45am Wow....very moving and affecting Cathy. You made the words both beautiful and horrific. To me it's very disturbing to hear, put down in words, what my husband must go through watching me. I wish we could spare our supporters that type of pain. Wishing you both strength right now, Tracey |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by Slammy on Apr 11th, 2003, 10:17am Great Job Cathy! :-* It's a perspective that is real and we sufferers need to see it through clear eyes..... thank you, all you supporters out there... for taking the time to learn, to understand, to do anything to help us.... Now, STFU and leave me alone! ;D dammit! I hate when a new cycle is kickin in! :-/ Love ya all! Slammy 8) |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by Bonniegirl on Apr 11th, 2003, 11:22am :'(Your words just grabbed my heart. Thank you for making me feel a little less crazy. You've got such a talent for really taking a person to that place we know too well. How the heck do you guys do it? I am inspired. PFDANs -Bonniegirl |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by hanisdee on Apr 11th, 2003, 6:48pm I actually started crying when I read that, it is so true! |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by cathy on Apr 11th, 2003, 6:53pm on 04/11/03 at 10:17:53, Slammy wrote:
Hey Slammy I hope that doesn't mean your back in cycle again... :'( btw...which job are you refering too... ;) :-* Cathy |
||
|
Title: Re: Through my eyes... Post by Opus on Apr 11th, 2003, 8:26pm Great poem Cathy, Opus :P |
||
|
Clusterheadaches.com Message Board » Powered by YaBB 1 Gold - SP 1.3.1! YaBB © 2000-2003. All Rights Reserved. |