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        New Message Board Archives >> 2002 Posts >> Classic Doc lines
        
(Message started by: jonny on Dec 21^st, 2002, 2:06pm)

Title: Classic Doc lines
Post by jonny on Dec 21^st, 2002, 2:06pm

"It could be a number of things"

Theres one, I know you all got another....lets hear them!!

.................jonny

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by cerebus on Dec 21^st, 2002, 2:15pm

" Are you having the pain now?"
" Where does it hurt?"

a couple more...

Cerebus

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Lapsi_Harmaahapsi on Dec 21^st, 2002, 2:17pm

This might not be a classic.

"It probably isn't CH, it's so rare."

My first neuro. Didn't hazard a guess as to what it was I was suffering from..

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by marty on Dec 21^st, 2002, 2:20pm

Jonny..

This may not be a Doctor - it was a Kaiser Nurse and it really happened..

Flue shot - stand in line, Nurse jabs the needle in my arm and injects the "stuff". Takes the needle out and blood it coming out from the injection site.

She freaks out: "You have an allergic reaction and have to sit in this chair for 30 minutes"

I sit in the chair for 30 minutes and the Nurse tells me that it was a light reaction and I was clear to leave.

As I open the door to leave, she tell me in a loud voice: "If you, within the next hour, find that you can't breath - you have to call 911 imidiately"!!!

Marty

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by jimbo on Dec 21^st, 2002, 2:25pm

DOC: "With all of the symtoms that you have right now, they must be migraines"

ME: "If not a very nice persons could fly, this would be an airport" ;D

Seeya,

Jimbo

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by jonny on Dec 21^st, 2002, 2:28pm

YUP!!!!

Thats what Im looking for, Marty

Horror Doc stories or lines.

.........................jonny

LMMFAO@ Jimbo.........If A-s-sh-oles could fly this would be an airport".......LMAO ;D

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Frank on Dec 21^st, 2002, 2:31pm

The first time I asked my Dr. for Imitrex injections for CH, he asked the nurse to give me an injection... only I wasn't having an attack at the time.

I asked WTF is this for? So the nurse said the Dr. ordered it because I had asked for Imitrex. I told the nurse, "yeah... I want a prescription for it... I don't need a shot now".

Totally clueless. Fortunately, they know better now.

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by K bogo on Dec 21^st, 2002, 3:33pm

"Sometimes seasonal allergies can cause occasional bad headaches and a stuffy nose. Let's get you a perscription for Allegra and see if that doesn't clear things up for you. "

This was after I had already been on 8 - 10 different medications that had failed. Go figure.

I must admit, I laughed at everyones posts here. Heard many of them myself.

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by catlind on Dec 21^st, 2002, 3:35pm

My favorite...... >:(

With all my cluster info in hand, and a diagnosis of cluster headaches and migraines,

Neuro: "Clusters are just another type of Migraines"

*SCREAM*

Or, from an ER nurse, "it can't hurt THAT bad!" ::)

Or yet another: "I've seen this behaviour before, you are just looking for drugs"

Like if I wanted drugs, I could find them alot easier on the street, and they'd be a fuck of alot more fun than demerol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cat

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by K bogo on Dec 21^st, 2002, 3:47pm

Here's another:

"All of your MRI and CAT Scans came back negative. There doesn't appear to be anything wrong with you."

I know I should have been happy, but after 6 doctors and numerous meds - this was very disheartening news for me.

Kim

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by firebrix on Dec 21^st, 2002, 3:54pm

What really irritated me in the early days of Mopar's CH was being told by medical professionals that the headaches would end. That they rarely lasted over twelve months. We kept waiting for them to end! When they didn't, the same professionals changed tack, and said "If you take this med, it'll fix the headaches". It didn't, and Mopar tried far too many.

When all those meds didn't work, and unable to deal with the continual pain and no sleep, he asked his doc (I'd read on the site that some used valium )for some 5mg Valium to help him to sleep. The doc said
"Do you have a drug problem?"
When Mopar replied that he didn't and then asked what made this alleged human ask this question, doc replied that he knew we did lots of shutdowns in industry, but we never had any money so assumed we spent it all on drugs.
Mopar replied thru clenched teeth that we actually PAY our staff well,(doctors don't) and as far as he knew, we didn't make as much as doctors and he too could be assumed to be a druggi - after all he looked poor (tacky dresser) was thin, with bad skin and had access!
The doc was deeply offended.
We changed doctors.
I thought it outrageous that a doctor should make a personal judgement (with no reason to) about us, denying treatment to one who obviously suffered in the extreme, while not looking inward at the same time.
But it's early and I'm tired.
Give me a few more hours and I'll think of more!!!!!
firebrix

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by SommelierCH on Dec 21^st, 2002, 6:23pm

The doctor before this one, was an “urgent care” Doc. Just to tied me over till I could get into the primary. I told her I didn’t want much, just a refill script for Maxalt MLT 10mg. or Zomig ZMT 5mg, and I brought the original boxes of each showing the script. She said “Oh no, these are very powerful drugs. I’m not a headache expert. I can’t give you a prescription for either of these, you might hurt yourself”. I gently replied “ Hurt myself? HURT MYSELF? HURT MYSELF?…Headache expert?…Lady, I self diagnosed my pain as cluster headaches, in 1986, from a “Readers Digest Medical Home Remedies” book that was laying around the house. Do you REALLY want me to hurt myself???” Funny, it didn’t take her very long to change her mind.

PFDAN,

David J.

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by rwolkie on Dec 21^st, 2002, 6:37pm

From my first doc:

"ok here is a prescription, i dont think you will abuse them, they cost $180.00 per week"

First thought: "you must be f'n insane"

Second thought: " i'd like to SHOW you abuse you old prick"

Third thought: "you must be f'n insane"

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Not4Hire on Dec 21^st, 2002, 7:13pm

Act I..Scene 5...(Scenes 1-4 were awaking with a brain aneurism or somefuckingthing, driving *somehow* to the ER, threatening the Admitting Nurse with mayhem, and begging for HEROIN)......... and the MRI tech/geek saying (w/ a smirk): "well, we looked in yer head and didn't find ANYTHING....ha ha ho ho...." luckily, I did not shoot this idiot where he stood..........

maybe this was ER *humor*.......I was NOT fucking amused........

Act III.....Scene 4 (the intervening Acts/Scenes were variations on the THEME).......the ER doc said: "....have ya ever tried o2?"....... THAT doctor has a place in My Personal Hall of Fame........( may he birdie every hole at his ex$pensive Country Club....forever........)

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by ave on Dec 21^st, 2002, 7:32pm

You know,I HATE to contribute on this...

The doc that substituted for my own during vacation DID misdiagnose me... as Trigemenal Neuralgia.

BUT she said, `Hey I know this is a killing headache. You might get the urge to jump off the roof. Here's my private number, call me anytime, night or day...'

I can not blame her for the wrong diagnosis. She cared...

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by suzy617 on Dec 21^st, 2002, 8:07pm

1- Are you taking cocaine?

2- What makes you think you have CH? This affects mostly men?

pleazzzzzze........just fuckin help me and stop asking such stupid questions....

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Frank on Dec 21^st, 2002, 8:08pm

on 12/21/02 at 19:32:39, ave wrote:

Your doctor may have got it wrong at first, but she actually cared. She gets a big thumbs up from me :D

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Charlie on Dec 21^st, 2002, 8:26pm

I asked my 12 year old neurologist if had many Cher patients. He said he had a few. Then he said:

"Cluster headaches can be very painful." ::)

Charlie

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Mark C on Dec 21^st, 2002, 8:55pm

I was mis-diagnosed for many years. At one ear, nose & throat guy (one of many) I actually got a kip10 sitting in his damn exam chair, right on front of him. I was like "alright, finally someone who KNOWS will SEE IT!"
I was going to finally get help, this guy was doing something! What he was doing was preparing to use a cannula on my sinuses.

Main Entry: can·nu·la
Pronunciation: 'kan-y&-l&
Function: noun : a small tube for insertion into a body cavity or into a duct or vessel

This guy was sticking a small metal hose in MY sinus and filling the sinus with saline solution and using a vacuum to remove it, in hopes of clearing up my "sinus infection"

30 seconds into the procedure I felt violently ill and said
"I AM GOING TO BLOW"...........and did......everywhere. This is the same guy who used a vacuum on my ears and had me in tears from the pain, and I ain't no stranger to pain! Needless to say he didnt help me much, evil bastard! It was still several years after this before I was finally sent to a Neuro, buy ANOTHER ENT as as a matter of fact.
SHEEEEEEESH..............PF Holidays to all

http://foxtrotters.tripod.com/ponyrun.gif

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by K bogo on Dec 22^nd, 2002, 3:53pm

Yup, I can just keep on contributing if you give me long enough to think about it!.....

FOR ALL YOU WOMEN WITH CLUSTERS ;).......
When I asked the doctor if it could be Cluster Headaches he left the room, came back and said....
"No, my book says that is mainly a Man's headache - typically men over 50, heavy drinkers and smokers. But I will tell you, hormones can really give my wife a headache around her "cycle". I think that might be an avenue we should explore. Do you feel like your hormones are in balance?"

>:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:(

Kim

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Drk^Angel on Dec 22^nd, 2002, 4:21pm

"Children don't get headaches."

PFDAN.................................... Drk^Angel

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by jonny on Dec 22^nd, 2002, 4:38pm

Tell that to a 14 year old ME when I first got CH.

I love you ,DRK :-*

..........................jonny

Mark C.....Id be pissed too if someone was sticking a metal hose in my anus.......LOL ;D

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Brassbear on Dec 22^nd, 2002, 4:42pm

"...here, try this O2, but the tank may be empty and it might not do any good..." D'OH!

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Roxy on Dec 22^nd, 2002, 7:54pm

"It's just stress headaches...if you go home, relax, and stop worrying about things they will go away!"

YEAH...RIGHT...I really wanted to make him go away.

R

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Jackie on Dec 22^nd, 2002, 8:08pm

This was not CH related, of course, but still silly/classic. ;D

My doctor once told me I was pregnant....but just a little... ::)

I told him he had been watching to many comedians.. >:(

Jacks 8)

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Jarvis on Dec 22^nd, 2002, 9:53pm

Back around 1980 a nerdy little neuro gave me a list of items 7 pages long and 2 columns per page and said we are going to test these items for allergic reactions to see if these are causing your migraines. said he could test a few each week.... hmmm.lets see after 20+ years we would be up to about page 4 and he would be a little richer.......and still wouldnt have known it was clusters. ....................Lucky for Him and I, I didnt go back......... was the next week after, a dr J. stier in scottsdale AZ. got right on top of the CH. However his response at first was I'm not sure because nobody gets hit 10 times in a day. He met me after a while and said that someone in sweden or somewhere was getting the same so now we knew.

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by RevDeFord on Dec 22^nd, 2002, 10:02pm

I have a couple -

Paramedic after calling 911 at 2 a.m. after a 2 hour 10- the guy knows my dad - has been his partner before - "What kind of drugs are you using tonight?"

My Dad, well meaning paramedic for 25 years - "Headaches don't just happen like that, son"

Fortunately all of the doctors except one that I have dealt with have been excellent. The head of neurology at SHANDS at the University of Florida where I worked directly for the CEO said after doing and MRI, CT, and EEG, - "You have cluster headaches. We don't know why you have them. That is why we are spending more than 100 million on that nice new neurology center behind us. You have them, you will always have them, so might as well plan on living with them."

I'll never forget the neurologist who heard that I had had a cluster headache for more than 2 Hours at a 10. I called the ambilance and was transported tot he ER. I worked for the CEO at the time of this hospital so I was very recognizeable. After the attending had tried o2 and oxygen as I told her I usually took, she called him in for a consult. He said "Holy S***, you have had a cluster attack for more than 2 hours! I'll be right back." Then he went and got the biggest freakin needle I have ever seen - something that must be used to inject the heart or something, and said "I have never done this, but I have heard of it. I can't guarantee it. I am going to inject this needle into your nostril and fill it with lidocaine." I said "Do it". He did,and after I got relief, his response was "Holy S***, it worked. Mark that one down for the AMA guys!" and he left. ;D

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by paul_b on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 12:09am

HOLY SHIT I CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT I HAVE JUST READ.

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Tachometer on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 12:16am

"Take one of these 3 times daily for pain" on a bottle of 800 mg tablets of ibuprofen (Advil...however you spell it).

Yeah right...I could smacked my fingers with a roofing hammer and wouldn't have felt that...but the CH burned straight through that Advil haze.

Advil....whatever!

Neil

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by 7yrscronic on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 1:52am

When I got my O2 set-up at home the guy said they have people who use them for a year and then call to have them picked up. "Wow" I thought. "Don't need O2 after a year." That was 5 years ago.

My nuero is so old, he has to be 70+, the last time I saw him, I told him how much Zomig I had been taking. He asked me who had been authorizing the refills!! Why don't doctors have a mandatory retirement age? He's also the same nuero who won't give me a referal to the Pain Managment Center. Because they don't treat Clusters there. Of course I had already checked that out(and they do).....that's why I want the referal!

Todd

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Ann on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 8:13am

I'm surprised that no one has come up with this one.

"I think your headaches are psychosematic. Here's a referral to a really good psychologist. Go and see her, she will be able to help you"

Yeah right...it was very helpful at 70.00 an hour! NOT!

hugs
Ann

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by 9erfan on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 10:40am

I love this topic!! :P
Let's see...where do I begin?

"I don't think you have clusters because you're a woman..."

"Why do you think you have clusters? I don't think you do because clusters don't come daily for this long..."

"Why don't you try getting off the pill and we can see how that affects your headaches? Why do you need to be on the pill anyway, you're married..." Huh??

After giving my new Dr a list of meds that I had already tried...."well, what would you like to try next?"....Gee, I don't know not a very nice person!! How 'bout you tell me since you're the one with the MD behind your name!!!

Nurse in the ER "yeah, I get really bad migraines too. What triggers yours?"..I just looked over at my mom with this look of desperation and mom said "she doesn't have migraines. these are much worse, the pain is unbearable. and she doesn't feel like talking".

Another nurse in the ER as she was walking out the door "lay down and relax". In fact, she told me 3 times to lay down. Now look idiot...if you knew anything about clusters you'd know that I feel worse when I lay down!! This is not a migraine!!!

"How long have you had these headaches? And how long have you known your husband? ha ha hee hee!" Yeah, doc that was a good one!

I'm sure I'll think of more.... ;D

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by brain_cramps on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 10:53am

1 - "No pain is THAT bad!"
- Response "#**&^&@@&!!!"
2 - "Cluster Headaches - Why didn't you say so?"
- Response "#**&^&@@&!!!"
3 - "Are you sure you don't want another shot of demerol before you go?"
- Response "Bffrst bluk frst foy bffrst!"

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by 9erfan on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 11:21am

OH MY GOSH! I just realized that I became a New Board Veteran! ;D ;D I feel very priviledged! Of course, don't let that title fool you...it just means I type a lot! ;D
I don't know 1/2 as much as the other vets on this board! :D

Virginia

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by ZAIRA on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 1:14pm

My experience:
First neurologist:“you are an imaginary ill >:(” (I was 14 yrs. old and no one thought I could have CH)

Second one (and more intelligent): “Zaira, poor child, you are CH :o affected!”

Ciao, Zaira :-*

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Drk^Angel on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 2:27pm

The first time a doc mentioned clusters to me about 5 years ago...

"It sounds sorta like cluster headaches, but the only treatment for them is oxygen, and you can't go around carrying an oxygen tank with you everywhere you go, so I think we should rule out everything else first." In which he preceeded to prescribe me various NSAIDs that didn't work for the next six months, until I lost insurance coverage, and decided the doc wasn't worth paying out of pocket for.

Or in the ER...

"This might hurt a little." Before the doc started the lumbar puncture, in which he messed up the first time, and caused a bolt of pain shoot down my leg.

PFDAN.......................................... Drk^Angel

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Bob P on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 3:03pm

Years ago, I would take 3 asprin every 3 hours for my entire cluster. Just an insurance policy.

About 4 weeks into one cluster I woke with a very bloated feeling. Stayed home from work and around noontime I started hurling blood. Called my wife to come home from work and take me to the Dr. I walked into the Dr.s office after weeks of 3 CH a day, no sleep and now bleeding inside. The doc came into the room, took one look at me and straight faced asked,

"Feelin' kinda puny today?"

I remember thinking that was an understatement.

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Jackie on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 4:47pm

Just today......after Blake told the doctor that he sometimes banged his head the doctor said, "Well, maybe if you get tired enough of beating your head on the doorjamb you'll stop the cigarettes and coffee"... >:(

That's when I wanted to hit the 'good' doctor him right between the eyes... >:( I should have!!!!!!!!!!!

Jacks 8)

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by eyes_afire on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 6:38pm

So, there I am in the midst of a nasty cycle and the doc has been trying different things to no avail. And so I'm sitting there looking rather glum. And the doc asks:
"Are you depressed?"
::) ::) ::) ::)
At the time I didn't know that conversation was the first step toward my Paxil nightmare >:(

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by Elaine on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 8:12pm

I have two.

One was before they found out they were clusters they gave me demorol(sp) I not only had cluster attacts but was throwing up along with it. My Husban put me in the cr took me to the doctor and he told her. She not only in pain now but is throwing up. The Doctor looks at me and says in a harsh voice "If you keep throwing the medication up how do you expect it to stop the Pain?" I won't repeat what my husband said to her as we left !!!

Two was I was having attacks back to back hard for days. My mother called my doctor. " He told her to tell me to walk it off, he was at his rental property and did not have time to go to the office". I had been walking and rocking for days and he wanted me to walk more ! :'(

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by cootie on Dec 23^rd, 2002, 8:19pm

Doctor is reluctant to prescribe meds.....then dies of overdose later......what da.......???? Pam

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by catlind on Dec 25^th, 2002, 3:50pm

on 12/23/02 at 00:09:57, paul_b wrote:

HOLY SHIT I CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT I HAVE JUST READ.

You can't? Try this one on for size...
Dr Haas, the head of the neurology dept. for the university of syracuse, .... first refuses to allow my husband to accompany me in the room.
Was on prednisone at the time, 8 weeks into it, 40 mg a day. Dr sat on his side of the desk, I sat on the other, he read the referral letter requesting a full neurological workup. Asked what I took for the headaches, told him.
He said you have analgesic overuse headaches and migraines. Stop all your medications and take Aleve. I said stop the pred??? He said yes.

End of appt. This guy is the head fucking neuro?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?! >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:(

To any of you who thinks he walks a golden road, you must be male, he's an arrogant, out of date, a s s hole.

Cat

(okay done ranting now)

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by JDH on Dec 25^th, 2002, 7:01pm

you're having Cluster Headaches...BUT we don't know much about them.

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by suzy617 on Dec 25^th, 2002, 7:22pm

Cat, Thats pretty scary, head of the neuro dept. perscribing aleve to you. ??? I'm sure you waited a long time to see this moron and he tells you that? I dont blame you for ranting!

suzy

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by j.halber on Dec 26^th, 2002, 5:27am

heard so many don't know where to start,got the classic doesn't usually happen to women guess you just have BAD luck.got the; it's because of the Shape of your face and the well not much to do it is the highest rated suicide sickness in the country bye and good luck.And the time i was taken to the dr in the middle of the night, your just on drugs we'll just watch you till they ware off.Not too mention after the burning the nerve ending procedure that i resisted for a couple of years and only made them worse;Well this procedure rarely works on cronics.... afterwards cute.And the its in your teeth we'll have to do the paradontitis procedure,Ouch, And the woman I know who they removed ALL her teeth on the left side of her mouth and many many more.Now it's the Imitrex is not healthy for you so we want to stop them and let you try to survive with NOTHING. BLA BLA BLA!If it wears a white coat it should be SHOT!

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by jimbo on Dec 26^th, 2002, 10:21am

My wife is reading this post over my shoulder. She's kind of chuckling (Not at the pain ) but wants me to ask the women on this post how many times they've heard "When was your last period?" She absolutely hates that one! " She said it's usually the first question they ask. >:(

Seeya,

Jimbo

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by jonny on Dec 26^th, 2002, 10:31am

Oh Damn!!!

I hear that one every visit, Jimbo ;D

..........................jonny :D

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by pimmony on Dec 26^th, 2002, 10:44am

Same same

doctor: You cannot have CH because it is rare and mostly happens to men.

me: I am aware of that but it does not preclude my having them. Please take this seriously because they are really really painful and I badly need help with this )yes, I really did say that)

doctor: Okay I am putting you on Inderal for two months and if that does not work there are plenty more nasty drugs we can try out.

I found this site and never looked back - especially at that doctor.

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by catlind on Dec 26^th, 2002, 12:13pm

Jimbo,

Tell your wife that yes I've heard that one, and can top it.....They did a full and complete hysterectomy on me saying that my endometriosis was autoimmune in nature as was the CSF around the pituitary gland and if they could stop the pit gland producing the hormones, then the headaches would stop....

Okay, take out all the parts in my abdomen to get rid of a headacha?? YEEF

Cat

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by RevDeFord on Dec 26^th, 2002, 1:10pm

Wanna know when my last period was? Don't ask any more stupid questions. Period. Ooops, I guess I just had my last period for now.

Title: Re: Classic Doc lines
Post by j.halber on Dec 27^th, 2002, 4:48am

Actually never heard the period one,luckily, but constantly get the; after you go through Menopause the "Staistics"show that there will probably be no more pain. Only another 15 years or so to go every day....whoopeeeee.
Always encouraging,those Docs.If the pain doesn't want the make you take the big sleep them Docs will help all they can!