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Topic: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans (Read 578 times) |
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RevDeFord
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Pain is real if the neighbors know you have it!
 
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Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« on: Jul 31st, 2003, 4:15pm » |
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Question:
You are walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.
Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?"
Liberal Answer
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or opressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have an appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun, and what kind of messsage does this send to society and to my children?
Is t possile he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definately want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days to try to come to a conclusion.
Conservative Answer:
BANG!
Texan's Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! CLICK...(reload)
Wife: "Sweetheart, he looks like he's still moving, what do you kids think?"
Son: "Mom's right Dad, I saw it, too."
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!BANG! CLICK...(reload)
Daughter: "Nice group, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?"
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I don' know why it hurts, but I pray it will stop.
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vig
CH.com Alumnus
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #1 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 4:18pm » |
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I thought that's what kneecaps were for...
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never, Never, NEVER quit. -Winston Churchill
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Big Dan
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #2 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 4:18pm » |
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LMFAO!....
... but something tells me your going to regret posting that... lol
-Big Dan
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Not going anywhere for a while?...
... Grab a Snickers, Fatass.
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BruceD
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #3 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 4:21pm » |
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Stupid post-ban mags. 
BruceD
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Childhood is short, maturity is forever. (The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes)
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M.R.
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #4 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 5:53pm » |
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ROFLMAO
This one will make the rounds at work
Thanks
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Calling an illegal alien an undocumented immigrant is like calling a drug dealer a unlicensed pharmacist..
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Mark C
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #5 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 6:28pm » |
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LMAO...dont worry 'bout the good Rev Dan, he's pretty tough, he has connections!
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Click The Flag
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Miklos
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #6 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 8:43pm » |
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Since, like your blonde joke post, you lifted this clip from the internet let's see how it goes.
Damn Right! Liberals think/worry too much.
Conservatives: Don't think. Shoot first; ask questions later. It might have been justified. An all white jury won't convict.
Texans: A classic reaction from our executive branch. Shoot everything in sight. Then, have the CIA/FBI tell everybody the guy was probably a terrorist. They have his library and book store records to prove it. Assume personal responsibility a week or two later.
For those interested in political excrement, this post provides two piles. The only difference is that the elephant manure is a bigger pile and doesn't smell as sweet.
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Don't be offended by my frank analysis. Think of it as personality dialysis.
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Charlie
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #7 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 9:41pm » |
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One thing about the Rev: Consistency.
Not sure what purpose any of this serves.
Charlie
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| « Last Edit: Aug 1st, 2003, 4:24pm by Charlie » |
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There is nothing more satisfying than being shot at without result---Winston Churchill
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Kirk
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #8 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 10:24pm » |
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A true conservative would have known a Glock is a pistol and not a gun. So I suspect the person behind the post is a Liberal
TTFN
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Charlie
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #9 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 10:36pm » |
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My liberal family isn't one to fool with. Mom was a pretty good shot and my grandmother kept a .32 in her nightstand.
I grew up in a well-armed family. It isn't a good idea to break in here
Charlie 
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There is nothing more satisfying than being shot at without result---Winston Churchill
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Kirk
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #10 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 10:57pm » |
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An armed society is perforce a polite society ;D
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Ted
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #11 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 10:59pm » |
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Why would Rev be taking a duck at this? This is the best he could do. I'm quite impressed with this. The Republicans are switching bait by silly things like this hoping no one will ever see the metaphor of this and that guy you just blasted away wasn't really armed but just was of a differerent race. All he held in his hands was a barf bag. But the conservative blew him away and the Texan kept blasting away. The liberal kept asking "what the fuck are you thinking? I WON'T help you hide the body!" I'm quite impressed with you, Rev. For giving up your cowboy-action, idiot-thinking party.
Anyone happen to catch the story on the statstics? That thousand wounded isn't a bullet to the leg. It's amputees. It's people losing rheir limbs everyday. It's 25 attacks at our soldiers every day.
Yup Rev. Good point!
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Charlie
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #12 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 11:14pm » |
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The thing is, Texas is full of Democrats. Always has been. Sadly it's full of people who think God gives a shit about politics.
Charlie
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There is nothing more satisfying than being shot at without result---Winston Churchill
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kim
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #13 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 11:18pm » |
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bULLSHIT.
think big. think texas. think ya bastid THINK 
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Ted
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #14 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 11:19pm » |
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ROFLMAO
This one will make the rounds at work
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kim
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #15 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 11:28pm » |
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Too late. I just shot you all. Yer dead in Texas ;D
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Ted
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #16 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 11:33pm » |
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I'd respond to this laughing but you know how it is. Admit you know the code and your tagged for life. DiMagio was third on twice three bases. 
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Big Dan
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #17 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 11:44pm » |
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Personally.. if someone were comming at my wife, child and I, I'd rather have chain-saw...
;D
-Big Dan
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Not going anywhere for a while?...
... Grab a Snickers, Fatass.
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kim
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #18 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 11:46pm » |
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What Code? I was playing golf with Bob Hope.
Your dead. Admit it.
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Ted
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #19 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 11:49pm » |
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Well actually, Dan. If you want to know the fucking truth, and I'm not kidding here (and I'm pretty sure you'll get the same damned thought from anyone, despite partisanship), this "When a child asks why it's raining, tell him God is crying. When he asks why God is crying, tell them 'Probably because of something you did'." is a pretty good fucking quote!
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| « Last Edit: Jul 31st, 2003, 11:50pm by Ted » |
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Ted
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #20 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 11:54pm » |
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I admit it. I'm dead.
Bob H
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kim
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #21 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 11:54pm » |
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God does not cry. He movesfurniture................ITS KRUMSKY YA NUMPSHELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Kirk
CH.com Alumnus
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #22 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 11:56pm » |
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A Stihl or a Husky Big Dan? I prefer the
Stilh myself. Of course we have trees in the GPNW.
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Ted
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #23 on: Jul 31st, 2003, 11:56pm » |
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God does not exist. Furniture is questionable!
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kim
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Re: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans
« Reply #24 on: Aug 1st, 2003, 12:01am » |
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yEAH WELL, THE freakin couch just rumbled. i think if i jump onto it wearing a thong, gpd will quit movin the end tables around......
cotton jaw maw
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