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Topic: Small Victories (Read 319 times) |
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BigCoffinHunter
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The man in black fled across the desert
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Small Victories
« on: Sep 23rd, 2006, 3:28am » |
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I work up at 3 this morning with what felt was hit that was going to be bad. Hit my zomig, pounded a few glasses of strong iced coffee... felt it peak at a 5 or 6 for several minutes, the quickly ebb. YES! Even better, I just counted, and I have more than enough Zomigs to make it to the next refill, assuming one hit per night.
The demon's timing was off tonight, usually get hit between 11 and 12, but I had stayed up till a little past midnight. He's a persistant one, I'll give him that.
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bothofus
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It's got to get better !
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Re: Small Victories
« Reply #1 on: Sep 23rd, 2006, 4:33am » |
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Glad to hear that ya got some quick relief. I too have been awaken by the beast only to find that when you are fully awake he crawls back in his hole.
Any victory is definitely a win!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Carl
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unhappy_jack
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I can't believe they're back!! (*well, you better)
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Re: Small Victories
« Reply #2 on: Sep 23rd, 2006, 7:26am » |
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You sound in good space! Mine have been pulling the 2:00 shift for the last 4 weeks. Unless I stay up passed 2, then it's 1 hour after whatever time I go down.
I like the iced coffee thing - I kind of discovered a day of strong icced tea seemed to make it a more tolerable day...
Have a wonder ful day, and may your visit tonight be short and mild.
J
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TxBasslady
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Bass fishin' is a h00t It's the catchin' that sux
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Re: Small Victories
« Reply #3 on: Sep 26th, 2006, 11:17pm » |
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on Sep 23rd, 2006, 7:26am, unhappy_jack wrote:| Unless I stay up passed 2, then it's 1 hour after whatever time I go down. |
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I used to intentionally stay up past the time of my normal hits. I thought it was insurance that I wouldn't get hit at all. Silly me, the hit still came...it was just later...kinda like unhappy's.
Didn't take long for me to realize I wasn't anywhere near as smart as I thought I was. 
The beast is a sly one...indeed.
Jean
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| « Last Edit: Sep 26th, 2006, 11:18pm by TxBasslady » |
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How lucky I am... to have known someone who was so hard to say goodbye too.
Take a kid fishin
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I adopted a Vietnam POW/MIA from El Paso, Texas! 
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unhappy_jack
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Re: Small Victories
« Reply #4 on: Sep 27th, 2006, 6:53am » |
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I know exactly what you mean! I think, everytime they come around, for the last 35 years, that I have it figured out. LOL!!!!
I think when this batch is over, I'm going to write something up. Like...remember how Steve Martin used to talk about "getting SMALL"? Not sure how others deal, but when mine is really cranking, I'm out on my side porch, where it's really cool....and I'm doing my best to squeeze that bastard out of my head, or shake it out...whatever. I also know that I try to give the pain a size and shape... and then focus on getting it away from me (because it is NOT inside me, but outside). During that time, I do not have peripheral vision.. in fact, it's such a tunnal that my visual field is pretty much limited to the area between my pupils! All in all, it equates to me being about the size of a large bag of potato chips!!!
When I do this visualization, I can clearly see when the pain is leaving, and it seems that sometimes, I can actually make it go quicker. Kind of a biofeedback thing
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Charlotte
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Re: Small Victories
« Reply #5 on: Sep 27th, 2006, 8:59am » |
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Like Jean said, the beast is tricky.
Before this August, I had never tried to separate the pain from myself, but had done it the other way by separating myself from the pain, so when the bad cycles and minicycles were over, I actually felt like I had just moved into the neighborhood or started a new job.
I still can't visuallize the beast, but I can feel what size and a vague shape and how fast it moves. There is more of me existing, this way.
Charlotte
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TxBasslady
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Re: Small Victories
« Reply #6 on: Sep 27th, 2006, 2:05pm » |
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on Sep 27th, 2006, 6:53am, unhappy_jack wrote:I know exactly what you mean! I think, everytime they come around, for the last 35 years, that I have it figured out. LOL!!!!
I think when this batch is over, I'm going to write something up. Like...remember how Steve Martin used to talk about "getting SMALL"? Not sure how others deal, but when mine is really cranking, I'm out on my side porch, where it's really cool....and I'm doing my best to squeeze that bastard out of my head, or shake it out...whatever. I also know that I try to give the pain a size and shape... and then focus on getting it away from me (because it is NOT inside me, but outside). During that time, I do not have peripheral vision.. in fact, it's such a tunnal that my visual field is pretty much limited to the area between my pupils! All in all, it equates to me being about the size of a large bag of potato chips!!!
When I do this visualization, I can clearly see when the pain is leaving, and it seems that sometimes, I can actually make it go quicker. Kind of a biofeedback thing |
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Your description is right on.
I like to think I can somewhat control the beast...and as long as I think I am, I can. Call it a mindset...an imagination...a dream (LOL)...whatever.
It's all quite similar to other techniques...even Charlie's circulatory technique.
The beast wants us on the floor...writhing in pain. He wants us to beat our heads on the floor and the walls. When we cry out from the pain, he laughs.
This pisses me off...and I'll do anything in my power to make sure he doesn't get his way.
I don't obsess about CH...I don't dwell on it. I don't ask "why me".....cause this is when he's at his best.
There's others who have it much worse than I. There's 4 year olds with CH....and this is a heart breaker! I've said this before...and again, if my having CH means that there's one child, one man or woman somewhere, who doesn't have CH...then bring it on. It makes my trip so much easier. 
Jean
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How lucky I am... to have known someone who was so hard to say goodbye too.
Take a kid fishin
www.takemefishin.org
I adopted a Vietnam POW/MIA from El Paso, Texas!
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Bond007
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Re: Small Victories
« Reply #7 on: Sep 27th, 2006, 3:17pm » |
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Congrats on the victory, however small you may think it is, bro! It's still a WIN! Keep it up!!!
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Sometimes life bites you in the ass -- that's what drugs are for!!
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