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Topic: Jokes for Women (No bitching from men...) (Read 353 times) |
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Tiannia
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Life does not apologies......
 
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Jokes for Women (No bitching from men...)
« on: Jan 23rd, 2004, 3:03pm » |
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OK I know that guys are gonna read this but still... I needed to put this up.. I needed a laugh today. Have fun.
Tia
Marriage (Part I)
Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the
wedding, he laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want,
if I want and at what time I want-and I don't expect any hassle from
you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I
won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and
card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a
hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?" His new bride
said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex
here at seven o'clock every night... whether you're here or not."
( SHE'S GOOD!)
Marriage (Part II)
Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding
anniversary!
The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that
reads, 'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever.' "Yeah?" she replies. "When
you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads, "Here Lies My Husband
Stiff At Last.'
(HE ASKED FOR IT!)
Marriage (Part III)
Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast
table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed
either," and storms out of the house. After sometime he realizes he was
nasty and decides to make amends and rings her up. She comes to the
phone after many rings, and the irritated husband says, "what took you
so long to answer the phone?" She says, "I was in bed." "In bed this
early, doing what?" "Getting a second opinion!"
(YEP, HE HAD THAT COMING, TOO!)
Marriage (Part IV)
A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so
proud of himself, that he starts calling his wife," Mother of Six" in
spite of her objections. One night, they go to a party. The man decides
that it's time to go home and wants to find out if his wife is ready to
leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home
'Mother of six?" His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of
discretion shouts right back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four."
(RIGHT ON, LADY!)
God may have created man before woman but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.
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| « Last Edit: Jan 23rd, 2004, 3:04pm by Tiannia » |
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The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change. - Carl Rogers
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magman
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I love YaBB 1G - SP1!
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Re: Jokes for Women (No bitching from men...)
« Reply #1 on: Jan 23rd, 2004, 3:25pm » |
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ROTFLMAO:
Thanks Tia, I need a hearty laugh today.
Peace,
357Mag
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KingOfPain
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Disgusted!
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Re: Jokes for Women (No bitching from men...)
« Reply #2 on: Jan 23rd, 2004, 4:05pm » |
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LMAO!!!
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Arrived August, 1999.
We swallow greedily any lie that flatters us, but we sip only little by little at a truth we find bitter.
- Denis Diderot
Real friendship is shown in times of trouble; prosperity is full of friends. - Euripides
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Cerberus
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Whomever said that two heads are better than one?
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Re: Jokes for Women (No bitching from men...)
« Reply #3 on: Jan 23rd, 2004, 5:28pm » |
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That WAS really amusing........... 
Ramon
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I would rather face the end with terror than terror without end. - (Deitrich Sawatsky 194?)
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Ree
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2008's my year to shine~SUN IS OUT!!!YAY
   
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Re: Jokes for Women (No bitching from men...)
« Reply #4 on: Jan 23rd, 2004, 9:18pm » |
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baaaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
and its alllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll very realistic...hehe ree
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Proud Mom to US ARMY Kiowa OH58 PILOT~CWO2 SCOTT Hawaii, & USMC Vet~Now POLICE OFFICER SEAN, Citizen of the Month~ Breezy~ Nana 4 Matt/Mike&Aya, MIL To Shino Wife to Dave HI BILL!http://www.myspace.com/dungareespocket http://www.prohawaiian.com
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ckelly181
New Board Old Timer
To err is human; To forgive, canine.
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Re: Jokes for Women (No bitching from men...)
« Reply #5 on: Jan 23rd, 2004, 9:30pm » |
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BOO-YA!!!!
Excellent. Almost makes up for the "moving nipple."
Hee hee...
Chris
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| « Last Edit: Jan 23rd, 2004, 9:31pm by ckelly181 » |
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Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.
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thomas
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Re: Jokes for Women (No bitching from men...)
« Reply #6 on: Jan 26th, 2004, 5:56pm » |
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LMAO
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