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Topic: Men's version of Maxine (Maynard) (Read 708 times) |
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aubmari
New Board Old Timer
Do not lose heart~
Gender: 
Posts: 362
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Men's version of Maxine (Maynard)
« on: Sep 20th, 2007, 3:48pm » |
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I know I am female but I just had to post it 
how many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman
is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me.."
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Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough
to build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door
and your wife is yelling at the front door,
who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food
that diminishes
a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a wedding cake.
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Women will never be equal to men
until they can walk down the street
with a bald head and a beer gut,
and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning,
God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
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Life is too short for drama & petty things, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, Love deeply and forgive quickly.
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aubmari
New Board Old Timer
Do not lose heart~
Gender:
Posts: 362
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Re: Men's version of Maxine (Maynard)
« Reply #1 on: Sep 20th, 2007, 4:03pm » |
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AND WHAT DOES MAXINE SAY ABOUT THIS?.....
Wipe your mouth.... there is still a tiny bit of bullsh*t around your lips. 
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Life is too short for drama & petty things, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, Love deeply and forgive quickly.
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Wayne
New Board Old Timer
RedBull Rules!!
Gender: 
Posts: 299
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Re: Men's version of Maxine (Maynard)
« Reply #2 on: Sep 20th, 2007, 5:36pm » |
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What do you do if your wife keeps nagging you while you're watching TV??
Shorten her chain so she can't get out of the kitchen.
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A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
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MR_FLOOR
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
Go Cubbies / even though they suck
Gender:
Posts: 1079
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Re: Men's version of Maxine (Maynard)
« Reply #3 on: Sep 21st, 2007, 3:58pm » |
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