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Topic: The day the Penis asked for a Raise (Read 427 times) |
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E-Double
CH.com Alumnus
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Are we ourselves?
  
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The day the Penis asked for a Raise
« on: Aug 29th, 2007, 9:41pm » |
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The Day the Penis asked for a Raise
I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
I do physical labor.
I work at great depths.
I plunge headfirst into everything I do.
I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
I work in a damp environment.
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
I work in high temperatures.
My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
Sincerely,
P. Niss
The Response:
Dear Penis:
After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
You do not work 8 hours straight.
You fall asleep after brief work periods.
You do not always follow the orders of the management team. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.
You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift. You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
You will retire well before you are 65.
You are unable to work double shifts.
You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed assigned task.
And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.
Sincerely,
V. Gina
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I can't believe that I have to bang my
Head against this wall again
But the blows they have just a little more
Space in-between them
Gonna take a breath and try again.
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MR_FLOOR
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Go Cubbies / even though they suck
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Re: The day the Penis asked for a Raise
« Reply #1 on: Aug 29th, 2007, 9:58pm » |
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Very funny
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sandie99
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Wish it, dream it, do it - inspite the pain!
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Re: The day the Penis asked for a Raise
« Reply #2 on: Aug 30th, 2007, 4:42am » |
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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Yorky
CH.com Alumnus
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learn to meditate (or just sit & do nowt)
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Re: The day the Penis asked for a Raise
« Reply #3 on: Sep 1st, 2007, 6:14am » |
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today is a gift.....thats why it is called the
present.
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aloneuk
CH.com Alumnus
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Re: The day the Penis asked for a Raise
« Reply #4 on: Sep 3rd, 2007, 2:37pm » |
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If you dance with the devil the devil don't change,
the devil changes you !
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Rosybabe
CH.com Alumnus
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"Too much of a good thing can be wonderful!!
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Re: The day the Penis asked for a Raise
« Reply #5 on: Sep 4th, 2007, 9:55pm » |
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 Believing is just the beginning!
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Lejla
New Board Newbie
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Posts: 50
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Re: The day the Penis asked for a Raise
« Reply #6 on: Sep 5th, 2007, 3:14pm » |
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bluesunshine
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Re: The day the Penis asked for a Raise
« Reply #7 on: Sep 6th, 2007, 4:18am » |
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that's a good one.
So did he quit?... lol
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cosmicfunkfather
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Old Timer
I'll just blow myself into a permanent type nod...
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Re: The day the Penis asked for a Raise
« Reply #8 on: Sep 6th, 2007, 9:27pm » |
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no win situation I think he should retire
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To not know is bad, To not wish to know -- is worse. 
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