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Topic: woman & drink (Read 527 times) |
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Yorky
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learn to meditate (or just sit & do nowt)
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woman & drink
« on: Apr 26th, 2007, 12:30pm » |
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u've been hit by the
|^^^^^^^^^^^^^^| ||
|...WINE TRUCK..........| ||'|";, ___.
|_..._..._______===|=||_|__|..., ] -
"(@)'(@)"" "''"**|(@)(@)*****''(@)
ONCE YOU'VE BEEN HIT, YOU HAVE TO HIT 5 WOMEN WHO LIKE TO HAVE FUN; INCLUDING THE ONE WHO SENT IT TO U . IF YOU GET HIT AGAIN YOU'LL KNOW YOU REALLY HAVE A PROBLEM !
WHEN GIRLS DRINK TOO MUCH............
1. WE HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHERE OUR PURSE IS.
2. WE BELIEVE THAT DANCING WITH OUR ARMS OVERHEAD AND WIGGLING OUR BUTT WHILE YELLING "WOO-HOO!" IS TRULY THE SEXIEST DANCE MOVE AROUND.
3. WE'VE SUDDENLY DECIDED THAT WE WANT TO KICK SOMEONE'S BUTT AND HONESTLY BELIEVE WE COULD DO IT TOO.
4. IN OUR LAST TRIP TO PEE, WE REALIZE THAT WE NOW LOOK
MORE LIKE A HOMELESS HOOKER THAN THE GODDESS WE WERE JUST FOUR HOURS AGO.
5. WE START CRYING AND TELLING EVERYONE WE SEE THAT WE LOVE THEM SOOOOO MUCH.
6. WE GET EXTREMELY EXCITED AND JUMP UP AND DOWN EVERY TIME A NEW SONG PLAY'S BECAUSE "OH MY GOD! I LOVE THIS SONG!"
7. WE'VE FOUND A DEEPER/SPIRITUAL SIDE TO THE GEEK SITTING NEXT TO US.
8. WE'VE SUDDENLY TAKEN UP SMOKING AND BECOME REALLY GOOD AT IT.
9. WE YELL AT THE BARTENDER, WHO WE BELIEVE CHEATED US BY GIVING US JUST LEMONADE, BUT THAT'S JUST BECAUSE WE CAN NO LONGER TASTE THE GIN.
10. WE THINK WE ARE IN BED, BUT OUR PILLOW FEELS STRANGELY LIKE THE KITCHEN FLOOR (or the mop?)
11. WE FAIL TO NOTICE THAT THE TOILET LID'S DOWN WHEN WE SIT ON IT.
12. WE TAKE OUR SHOES OFF BECAUSE WE BELIEVE IT'S THEIR
FAULT THAT WE'RE HAVING PROBLEMS WALKING STRAIGHT
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today is a gift.....thats why it is called the
present.
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aprilbee
CH.com Alumnus
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Ain't I a stinkah!!
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Posts: 1442
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Re: woman & drink
« Reply #1 on: Apr 26th, 2007, 2:04pm » |
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This also works when we drink to much takillya! And I would also like to add....we will go home with anyone who asks when the tequila takes affect..... 
(uh..that may just apply to me....)
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| « Last Edit: Apr 26th, 2007, 2:04pm by aprilbee » |
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JeffB
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Wide open till you see God, then brake
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Re: woman & drink
« Reply #2 on: Apr 27th, 2007, 11:42am » |
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Can I buy you a few dozen shots?? 
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" It's been my experience that people who have no vices have very little virtues."
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LeLimey
CH.com Alumnus
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OUCH-US - Less "ME" and more "WE"
 
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Posts: 11720
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Re: woman & drink
« Reply #3 on: Apr 27th, 2007, 11:58am » |
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Jeffie it would take more than a few dozen shots
Your best chance of getting lucky is chloroform lovey
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The arsehole I'm divorcing needs to get a life and stop stalking mine
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JeffB
CH.com Alumnus
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Wide open till you see God, then brake
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Re: woman & drink
« Reply #4 on: Apr 27th, 2007, 10:55pm » |
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on Apr 27th, 2007, 11:58am, LeLimey wrote:Jeffie it would take more than a few dozen shots
Your best chance of getting lucky is chloroform lovey |
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Chloroform, of course. Brilliant. Now we know why so many men went missing on that little island you live on. I believe there were movies based on "actual" events called...."28 days" and the other "Shawn of the dead."
I bet with your technique, I'll be doin the nasty with a bevy of passed [s]out, zombie[/s] women by tomorrow night! 
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" It's been my experience that people who have no vices have very little virtues."
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alienspacebabe
CH.com Alumnus
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yup. i am. i do. uh huh. you know it hon.
 
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Re: woman & drink
« Reply #5 on: Apr 28th, 2007, 1:01am » |
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on Apr 26th, 2007, 12:30pm, Yorky wrote:
11. WE FAIL TO NOTICE THAT THE TOILET LID'S DOWN WHEN WE SIT ON IT.
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How'd you know? 
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Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves.
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LeLimey
CH.com Alumnus
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OUCH-US - Less "ME" and more "WE"
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Posts: 11720
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Re: woman & drink
« Reply #6 on: Apr 28th, 2007, 2:18am » |
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on Apr 27th, 2007, 10:55pm, JeffB wrote:
I bet with your technique, I'll be doin the nasty with a bevy of passed [s]out, zombie[/s] women by tomorrow night! |
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Posy the pig, Clarice the Cow, Daisy the dog and Sharon the Sheep no doubt 
You wouldn't get close enough to the two legged variety to be ABLE to chloroform them lovey 
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JeffB
CH.com Alumnus
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Wide open till you see God, then brake
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Posts: 2729
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Re: woman & drink
« Reply #7 on: Apr 28th, 2007, 9:56pm » |
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Brutal!
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" It's been my experience that people who have no vices have very little virtues."
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LeLimey
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
OUCH-US - Less "ME" and more "WE"
Gender:
Posts: 11720
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Re: woman & drink
« Reply #8 on: Apr 29th, 2007, 4:45am » |
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Yes - but you wouldn't love me any other way
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The arsehole I'm divorcing needs to get a life and stop stalking mine
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Rosybabe
CH.com Alumnus
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"Too much of a good thing can be wonderful!!
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Posts: 3470
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Re: woman & drink
« Reply #9 on: May 8th, 2007, 3:54pm » |
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 Believing is just the beginning!
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