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Topic: Sayings not found on Hallmark Cards (Read 286 times) |
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zwibbs/Scott
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Sayings not found on Hallmark Cards
« on: Jun 30th, 2006, 4:25pm » |
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THINGS THAT HALLMARK CARDS DON'T SAY!!!! //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// /////////////////////////////////////////////// M y tire was thumping. I thought it was flat When I looked at the tire... I noticed your cat. Sorry! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ H eard your wife left you, How upset you must be. But don't fret about it... She moved in with me. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ L ooking back over the years that we've been together, I can't help but wonder... "What the hell was I thinking?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ C ongratulations on your wedding day! Too bad no one likes your husband. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ H ow could two people as beautiful as you Have such an ugly baby? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I 've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love After having met you .. I've changed my mind. -------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------- I must admit, you brought Religion into my life. I never believed in Hell until I met you. //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// ////////////////////////////////////////////// A s the days go by, I think of how lucky I am... That you're not here to ruin it for me. #################################################### C ongratulations on your promotion. Before you go... Would you like to take this knife out of my back? You'll probably need it again. ************************************************************************ ******** H appy Birthday, Uncle Dad! (Available only in Tennessee, Kentucky & North Carolina) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ H appy birthday! You look great for your age. Almost Lifelike! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ W hen we were together, you always said you'd die for me. Now that we've broken up, I think it's time you kept your promise. //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// ////////////////////////////////////////////// W e have been friends for a very long time .. let's say we stop? +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ I 'm so miserable without you it's almost like you're here. ===================================================== C ongratulations on your new bundle of joy. Did you ever find out who the father was? %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Y our friends and I wanted to do something special for your birthday So we're having you put to sleep. )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) )))))))))))))))))))))))) S o your daughter's a hooker, and it spoiled your day. Look at the bright side, it's really good pay
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