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   Author  Topic: Mr Bean  (Read 607 times)
Barry_T_Coles
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Australia 
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Gender: male
Posts: 1348
Mr Bean
« on: Apr 24th, 2006, 1:49am »
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MR.Bean in France called his wife who was living in London but the maid answered the phone.
 
Mr.Bean: Helo, pls give the phone to madam.
 
Maid: Sir, she is sleeping with her husband.
 
Mr.Bean:What?????Then who the hell am I ???
 
Maid: How would I know sir??
 
Mr.Bean: Ok, fine!! Now take the gun in the kitchen drawer and shoot madam with it.Then you come back and I will tell you what to do.
 
Maid: Sir, its done. Now what do I do with the body???
 
Mr.Bean: Go to the balcony and throw it from up to the ground floor!!!!
 
Maid: But sir, our house is at the ground floor.
 
Mr.Bean: Sorry, mine is at the 10th floor!!!!!!!
........................................................
 
COLOR TV
Mr.Bean is buying a TV. Do you have color TVs?
 
Sure.
 
Give me a green one, please.
.........................................................
 
LONG FLIGHT
 
Mr.Bean calls British Airways. How long does it take to fly to London?
 
Just a sec, comes an answer.Thank you. says the Mr.Bean and hangs up!
...........................................................
 
Drunken Driving
 
Mr.Bean was brought to court on charges of Drunken Driving. Just before the
trial there was a commotion in the gallery. The judge pounded the gravel  
on his table and shouted, Order, order.
 
Mr.Bean immediately responded, Thank you, your honour, I'll have a scotch
and soda.
 
...........................................................
 
Mr.Bean went to an eye specialist to get his eyes tested and asked, Doctor, will I be able to read after wearing glasses?
Yes, of course, said the doctor, why not!  
Oh! How nice it would be , said Mr.Bean with joy, I have been illiterate for so long.
.................................................
 
One day Mr.Bean's neighbor visits him and sees Mr.Bean crying.
The neighbour: What had happened?
Mr.Bean: My mother died yesterday.
The neighbor made him some coffee and settled him down a little and then left. The next day the same neighbor went back over to the house and found Mr.Bean crying again.
The neighbour: Why are you crying today Mr.Bean?
Mr.Bean: I just got off of the phone with my brother, his mother died too.
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Worry is like a rocking chair it gives you something to do but gets you nowhere.
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sandie99
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Finland 
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Wish it, dream it, do it - inspite the pain!

   


Gender: female
Posts: 10429
Re: Mr Bean
« Reply #1 on: Apr 25th, 2006, 11:15am »
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laugh
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!

"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)

"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)


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