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Topic: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)... (Read 896 times) |
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Melissa
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I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)...
« on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 9:38am » |
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Sorry for the vent, but I've just been feeling like I'm a cheap, old woman having a baby. I suppose it's really stupid of me to be on a website for pregnant women, but I thought it'd be fun to share in my pregnancy with others. Instead I get cattiness, lectures on old furniture (I bought a 30 yr old Lullabye crib for $15 from a lady nearby for Ava) and bragging about all the new expensive things they bought for their babies ($70 freaking dollars for a diaper bag! and the lady said it was a "reasonable" price!). I thought I was doing a great job, getting good deals (bought 95% of the stuff I need off eBay), and I would never put my baby in danger from a crib (the recalls are insane lately, as in why the older crib appealed to me). Maybe I'm just not cut out for this anymore... I'm sure this is a very selfish post to be writing here, but my hormones are very wacky and I cry at least twice a day due to it. You guys are the most like-minded, laid back people I know. I need to be with my own kind, this is where I belong. Pregnant or not. lyg, mel
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« Last Edit: Oct 23rd, 2007, 9:58am by Melissa » |
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sandie99
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch...
« Reply #1 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 9:59am » |
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Oh Mel... You ARE doing a great job! Don't let those others make you feel rotten about your choices (I know it's not easy...). I bet that some of those mums-to-be are young and don't have the experice on their side like you do and the rest just don't have any excuse than being mean. You did the right thing when you came here. Venting is allowed! Lots of , Sanna
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George_J
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch...
« Reply #2 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 10:02am » |
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Yep, the whole baby-stuff market is nuts. If a person paid much mind to the folks selling baby stuff, and the frantic consumers buying it, you would think it took as much equipment to have a baby as it took to mount a nineteenth-century expedition to Central Africa. In truth, of course, babies don't need much. They just need food, love, dry diapers, clean clothes, and a safe, warm place to sleep. Anything else is just gilding the lily. If we really needed to haul all that junk to have a baby around, we'd never have made it past the Pleistocene. Heck with 'em, Mel. You're doing great. Best wishes, George
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2late
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch...
« Reply #3 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 10:03am » |
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on Oct 23rd, 2007, 9:38am, Melissa wrote:Sorry for the vent, but I've just been feeling like I'm a cheap, old woman having a baby.. lyg, mel |
| not sure why you feel this way, I have 4 kids so i know from my wife about hormons out of control, these feelings will pass hang in there, positive Pittsburgh vibes heading your way
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LeLimey
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch...
« Reply #4 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 10:03am » |
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I'm not pregnant but according to some of you I eat weird shit so does that count Melly?! An old cot but with a new mattress would be exactly what I would want, There is nothing wrong with older stuff and to be honest, most of mine did for three kids anyway! The only thing I would buy brand new if I didn't have one would be a car seat as you need to know that hasn't been dropped or walloped about. You still don't need to spend a fortune though. Some people are insane about spending money. Full stop. If they weren't up the duff they'd be spending it on beany babies or "the cutest little doggie coat for Fang" - they just have to fill their empty brainless mindless thoughtless lives with Stuff because they know the price of everything but the value of nothing at all. You carry on your own sweet way Mel, you'll be a far better mum, who does things that count with her kids than any of these trophy mothers ever will. You're raising a family. All they are raising is their tax bracket. Mummy Melly ROCKS and don't you forget it! My friend Mel who is a very beautiful woman in her own right and is resourceful and creative to boot is someone I'm very proud to know too. lots of love Helen xxx
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« Last Edit: Oct 23rd, 2007, 10:47am by LeLimey » |
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Paul98
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #5 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 10:20am » |
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Mel, think of it this way...Perhaps some people throw money away and it makes them think they are a better parent. Perhaps their excessive spending is to compensate for other parental deficiencies. As long as your family is healthy then I wouldn't worry what others think or do. -P.
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MR_FLOOR
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #6 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 10:24am » |
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First off Mel please don't say your old, cause if you are I'm prehistoric, your not even in the high risk range yet. Secondly all Ava needs is mamas love, screw all that material stuff. Your looking at it the wrong way,you should be saying what an not a very nice person for buying a $70 diaper bag. To me thats just a round about way of bragging. I think theres a time when all mothers question there parenting abilities,well at least my wife did. Like you said thats the hormones talking,you will be fine,it's like riding a bike you never forget how to do it. Good luck hun. Remember we are all here for ya. Dave
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Melissa
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e: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related).
« Reply #7 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 10:36am » |
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God, I love you guys so much!!!!! I went back out to the garage to look again at the crib (where it's been since last Monday when I picked it up). And you know what? I just love it! Jesse said it's exactly like the one his mom had for him, which makes it all that more special. Even though the mattress is a little old, it's in spectacular shape except for a couple cuts on the underside (which always seems to happen with crib mattresses) that the woman's husband put duct tape over. Here's a pic... You guys are the greatest. I feel loads better and I think I'm going to disappear off that website... All it's doing is making me question my own judgement, which hasn't failed me yet!
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sandie99
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #8 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 10:48am » |
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I'm so glad that you're feeling better already, Mel! And that crib looks georgeous! I love that shade of wood. One lucky baby... Hugs, Sanna
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Rosybabe
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #9 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 10:55am » |
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Dear Mel, I bet the crib is beautiful! don't worry about those ladies, you are going to do what is right for you and your family. There is nothing wrong with trying to save money on baby stuff, the baby will outgrow everything and you will be stuck with things you will not need anymore. Save that money for diapers and formula, you are going to need it. A $70 diaper bag is such a waste of money, I rather spend that much on quality Bottles that will last longer and give me a lot more help than a diaper bag, you get one for free at the hospital. Or a good car seat that will grow with the baby and you can get a lot more use out of it. You are not old and I promise you look beautiful pregnant because you are going to be the Mommy of a beautiful baby. Keep that in mind and try to stay away from all those good for nothing pregnant boards...they are not of real help anyway ... Hugs Rosy.
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Mosaicwench
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #10 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 11:01am » |
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I tell people who ask about weddings and marriage to spend the most time and money on the "ever after" . . .the wedding is simply the day it starts, NOT the most important day of the marriage. Same with pregnancy and childbirth. Childbirth is simply the day the IMPORTANT stuff starts. Spend your time and energy and money the way YOU see fit and spend your love allowance every day. And cry like a banshee any old time you want to!!! Pregnancy is the only time women can be completely irrational and get away with it . . . .or is that menopause?? I'll get back to you on that part. . . .
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« Last Edit: Oct 23rd, 2007, 11:01am by Mosaicwench » |
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cash5542
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #11 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 11:04am » |
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I used a crib my aunt gave me that she used with her 5 kids. It was free! My diaper table was a toy chest that I grew up with and we made adjustments to it. The diaper bag was one too many beach bags I had. My kids are in their twenties now and they made it fine without all of the new stuff. Those first few years go so fast and before you know it you'll need a big girl/boy bed! We put extra money into college accounts and new baby checkups. Check the slats and be sure it meets the regulation sizes. That was the only real issue to buying used furniture. Enjoy your remaining months! When is your due date?? Charlotte
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LeLimey
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #12 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 11:04am » |
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Mel, if you remember nothing else remember this.. For the first 12 hours or so after the baby is born ALL NAPPIES ARE JESSE'S TO CHANGE. Got that? Crystal clear?!! Good! Once he's dealt with that stickier than sticky meconium yuk then every other nappy will be a doddle Daddyhood - It's all in the training y'know! LOL Tell Jesse I love him really
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Melissa
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #13 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 11:11am » |
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Pat- I guess we're allowed it more than once in life then, eh? lol Charlotte- I'm due March 2nd, but this is my 3rd and am preparing in case she comes early. on Oct 23rd, 2007, 11:04am, LeLimey wrote:Mel, if you remember nothing else remember this.. For the first 12 hours or so after the baby is born ALL NAPPIES ARE JESSE'S TO CHANGE. Got that? Crystal clear?!! Good! Once he's dealt with that stickier than sticky meconium yuk then every other nappy will be a doddle Daddyhood - It's all in the training y'know! LOL Tell Jesse I love him really |
| LMAO Helen! You do know tho, that he changed 5 of his siblings diapers and has NO qualms about it at all. I've never once heard him complain with Lily or Eli either. He's a definate diamond in a world full of granite!
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LeLimey
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #14 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 11:18am » |
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I'll agree with you there Mel, Jessie is a lovely, lovely man and I'm so very glad I got to meet him last year.. just wish I'd got to meet you both again this year but - there will be other times and I'll have a new mini-mel to snuggle with next time too! We definitely have to get Brid and Lily along with Jasper and Eli together - let the rioting begin
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Melissa
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #15 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 11:49am » |
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on Oct 23rd, 2007, 11:04am, cash5542 wrote:Check the slats and be sure it meets the regulation sizes. |
| Well, now I'm freaking out again! The regulation is supposed to be no wider than 2 3/8" and my crib is approx. 3 1/8" wide. A difference of 3/4". Ohforpetesake! Ava will be in her bassinet till she no longer fits in it and THEN she'll go into the crib. Cripes, why do things have to be so damn difficult nowdays???
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LeLimey
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #16 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 11:54am » |
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Don't worry Mel, just move them closer and add a couple of extra slats. The most you'll need to do is buy some new webbing to hold them together if you can't reuse the stuff holding them together now
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #17 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 11:56am » |
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on Oct 23rd, 2007, 11:49am, Melissa wrote: Well, now I'm freaking out again! The regulation is supposed to be no wider than 2 3/8" and my crib is approx. 3 1/8" wide. A difference of 3/4". Ohforpetesake! Ava will be in her bassinet till she no longer fits in it and THEN she'll go into the crib. Cripes, why do things have to be so damn difficult nowdays??? |
| Problem solved: Make the infant where a bike helmet. 1.) can't put its head through the slatswith it on, 2.) can't hurt its head with a helmet on. Maybe use 1" bubble wrap as carpeting in the room.
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Melissa
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #18 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 12:03pm » |
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on Oct 23rd, 2007, 11:56am, seasonalboomer wrote: Problem solved: Make the infant where a bike helmet. 1.) can't put its head through the slatswith it on, 2.) can't hurt its head with a helmet on. Maybe use 1" bubble wrap as carpeting in the room. |
| OMG, I'm laughing so hard I'm crying!...again! Ok, THANK YOU for that wake up SB! I've got to remember, I've done this twice before, once was 13 yrs ago and I'm sure I didn't have a "regulation" crib back then either. I will now take a deep breath and relax!
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« Last Edit: Oct 23rd, 2007, 12:04pm by Melissa » |
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Rosybabe
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #19 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 12:13pm » |
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you can always buy fishnet in a beautiful pastel color and cover all the sides of the crib, you just tie it securely to all sides of the crib with matching laces and maybe even attach some pretty butterflies...lots of possibilities...with the fishnet there is no way the baby head can be trap in the slots.
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Jimi
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #20 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 12:30pm » |
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By the time she gets out of the crib, her head will be big enough that it won't matter. That info is just for if you were putting a new baby in it. That crib is beautiful and unless you are planning on having an open house to show all the people in town all of your expensive gadgets that you bought for this one, don't worry about it. And get off that board. If you need to know anything, we'll handle it from here.
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DennisM1045
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #21 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 12:37pm » |
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I've never seen another site on the Internet where people are more down to earth than this one. What you saw on the other site is what I'm used to seeing; materialistic, shallow competition between people that are missing the whole point. You are having a Baby! It can be a most wonderful and life changing experience. These other idiots are lost in "things" and "being the best" and are not enjoying the truth: they are bringing another human being into existence. Someone who, God willing, will be with them and enrich them for the rest of their lives. You just want to yell out "It's about family stupid!". Mel, you have your priorities straight. You're doing a great job of making sure your new addition will have everything they need when the time comes. Most of all, this little one get to be born to a Mom who has her head on straight. That's more than can be said for a lot of kids. Good luck and don't let anyone ever make you feel bad about your approach to Motherhood. -Dennis-
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Bethany1
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #22 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 12:38pm » |
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That crib is the coolest! Ya know Mel, I get it all the time because I am a first time (new) mom and everyone has to give me their opinion on everything. If I listened to them all I would go insane. Sometimes I feel bad because I'm not a stay at home mom because we can't afford it... so be it. I love my son, and I take hand me downs with a big ol smile on my face... sure I can't afford the $1000 strollers all the celebrities have.. but who cares? As long as he is comfy and so am I than so be it. Frig em all. And those women that are braggin about all the crap they are buying probably have a miserable life and thats what they do to make up for it. Buy expensive crap so they look good... when in all reality, they look foolish.
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #23 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 12:39pm » |
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Mel, the hell what the others say about buying top of the line stuff. I love the crib you bought. It is way nicer than that over priced crap you buy new from wherever. Here is a hug for you. Take care.
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Re: I feel so aged and out of touch (baby related)
« Reply #24 on: Oct 23rd, 2007, 12:39pm » |
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Mel!!!!!!! You know better than that!!! It's YOUR baby, and if you are comfortable with what you are doing...SO BE IT!!!! You aren't going to put your baby at risk for ANY reason...we all know this. When I was pregnant with Conner, we didn't have a ton of money, 99.9% of all his clothes came from garage sales. Please.....I am NOT going to pay $30 for an outfit they are going to be in for less than two weeks!! Sorry, but I wasn't blessed with a tree in our backyard that dollar bills fell from. I kept all of his nicer clothes and that is what Brandon has been wearing...we had som any that we didn't even register for clothes. I've already had to put clothes back in boxes because he grew too fast to wear some of them!!! The crib thing...Cat gave us her convertable crib that her children used...they certainly aren't babies anymore (aging the crib) and all we had to do was change a cew hinges because of rust...and we bought a new mattress. PERFECT...saved us probably $500!!! (plus it's really special because it was from Cat) Babies are very expensive...they have gotten even worse, but don't EVER feel guilty because you are cutting costs. Just think of it this way, the more money you save now, the more you can put back for that $500,000 college bill you're gonna get!! Remember the days when they didn't have seat belts...lead base paint...drinks for the hose... You are a wonderful set of parents!!! Hand-me downs are just wonderful. Screw those caddi womens...call or write Aunt Steph...she won't give you a hard time!!!
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