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Topic: Blondes (Read 479 times) |
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chewy
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A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help
me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it
started. Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's
finished?"
Blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.
She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over
the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box,
then turns to her and says,
"First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to
assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger."
He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a
nice cup of tea, and then ...."
He sighed...............
"Let's put all the Frosted Flakes back in the box......"
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Rosybabe
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #1 on: Oct 12th, 2007, 12:48pm » |
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sandie99
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #2 on: Oct 12th, 2007, 1:16pm » |
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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Tiannia
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #3 on: Oct 12th, 2007, 1:27pm » |
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PollyPocket
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #4 on: Oct 12th, 2007, 5:11pm » |
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ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!
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“Life is all about timing... the unreachable becomes reachable, the unavailable become available, the unattainable... attainable. Have the patience, wait it out It's all about timing.” - Stacey Charter
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cosmicfunkfather
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #5 on: Oct 12th, 2007, 5:59pm » |
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"ROFLMBO"
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Jonny
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #6 on: Oct 12th, 2007, 6:57pm » |
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http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=9f9af150d1
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It is up to YOU to educate yourself and then help your doctor plan your treatment. If you just sit down in front of your doctor and say "make me better" you are setting yourself up for a great deal of pain.
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AussieBrian
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #7 on: Oct 12th, 2007, 7:52pm » |
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When it comes to blondes, the dumbest of the dumb are those who dye the roots of their hair dark brown without realizing how silly it looks.
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Vulcrania horrendus - twice daily, then two at night in lieu of sleep.
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jimmers
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #8 on: Oct 12th, 2007, 7:56pm » |
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Funnies and Jokes section? 
jimmers
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rolo65
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on Oct 12th, 2007, 7:56pm, jimmers wrote:Funnies and Jokes section?
jimmers |
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Chewy was blond in a previous life!
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| « Last Edit: Oct 12th, 2007, 8:40pm by rolo65 » |
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Groov
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #10 on: Oct 12th, 2007, 9:01pm » |
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2 blonde's burglarized a jewelry store.
They heard the cops coming, so they made a break for it. The first one ran across the rooftop and jumped onto the next roof.
The other says: "I cant make it, I cant jump that far"
The first one tells her that she will shine a flashlight from her roof to the others roof and the other can simply walk across the beam to escape.
The second blond says: "Ha, I wont fall for that one !!! You'll just turn the light off as soon as I get half way across!!!"
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PARABELLUM
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Charlie
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #11 on: Oct 12th, 2007, 10:25pm » |
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This is off topic but why do so many women dye their hair that strange chemical red color that is foregin to all humans?
It's a puzzlement.
Charlie
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Jonny
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #12 on: Oct 12th, 2007, 10:34pm » |
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on Oct 12th, 2007, 10:25pm, Charlie wrote:| This is off topic but why do so many women dye their hair that strange chemical red color that is foregin to all humans? |
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They are who-res, Charlie.
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It is up to YOU to educate yourself and then help your doctor plan your treatment. If you just sit down in front of your doctor and say "make me better" you are setting yourself up for a great deal of pain.
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Charlie
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #13 on: Oct 12th, 2007, 10:46pm » |
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Only in New York and Bastin is that a two syllable woid.
Charlie
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cynjeep89
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #14 on: Oct 13th, 2007, 10:17am » |
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The Cheerios puzzles are a lot easier than the Frosted Flakes.
There are no tiger stripes to try to match, the cereal circles are less fragile than the flakes and all of the puzzle pieces are the same shape.
You just open the box, pour the puzzle on the table, form into a square shape and the puzzle is done.
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Mosaicwench
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #15 on: Oct 13th, 2007, 10:32am » |
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on Oct 13th, 2007, 10:17am, cynjeep89 wrote:The Cheerios puzzles are a lot easier than the Frosted Flakes.
There are no tiger stripes to try to match, the cereal circles are less fragile than the flakes and all of the puzzle pieces are the same shape.
You just open the box, pour the puzzle on the table, form into a square shape and the puzzle is done.
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And you know this HOW, Cyn???
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The difficulties of life are intended to make us better, not bitter. ~Author Unknown
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cynjeep89
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #16 on: Oct 13th, 2007, 10:41am » |
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The blonde with the Frosted Flakes told me.
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sandie99
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #17 on: Oct 13th, 2007, 10:51am » |
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Good one, Cyn.
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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vietvet2tours
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #18 on: Oct 13th, 2007, 10:56am » |
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on Oct 13th, 2007, 10:41am, cynjeep89 wrote:| The blonde with the Frosted Flakes told me. |
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Kill em all let God sort em out
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sldrswyfe
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #19 on: Oct 13th, 2007, 11:20pm » |
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Charlie,
Assuming you REALLY are asking...it's because first, they dont know what they're doing. Have dark hair, and want it to be "lighter"....and you CANNOT do that with DARK hair...usually you "double process" meaning first, you "strip" the dark out with bleach, then deposit the "blonde" color you want in the hair. I know you're intelligent enough that I don't have to give you analogy.
Or...they didn't use one of the many products specifically designed to lighten dark hair to a light honey or golden blonde (think Jennifer Lopez. Her natural color is dark brown)....not brass red. The hair hasn't "come up high enough"...and it looks HORRIBLE...that is a MISTAKE...a hair disaster...they should NOT be walking out of a SALON like that...without it being corrected. Not if they went to a talented stylist, that takes their work seriously....it's a reflection on YOU....
Coming from both a stylist and a brunette with golden hi-lites around her face.... Hope that helped.
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zwibbs/Scott
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #20 on: Oct 14th, 2007, 5:45am » |
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Shedz
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #21 on: Oct 14th, 2007, 6:05pm » |
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I push my fingers into my eyes, It's the only thing that slowly stops the ache, But it's made of all the things I have to take, Jesus it never ends it just works its way inside, If the pain goes on, I AM gonna make it.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xps7AM8HbjE
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sldrswyfe
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Re: Blondes
« Reply #22 on: Oct 15th, 2007, 6:30am » |
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Charlie,
Being that you are from upstate...do you say "draw" or "drawer"....for an DRAWER...that thing that slides out of a cabinet and holds things..... 
My husband is from New York, and says "draw"....I say "draw" is a verb...."drawer" is an noun...and HE doens't say it right!! Of course, I don't say it right... 
We pronounce "a" differently too...the way he's says crab drives me nuts...I can't even phonetically think of way to type it.... just wondering 
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"Great spirits have always found violent
opposition from the mediocrities." -Einstein
"I'll DIE on MY FEET, before I LIVE on MY KNEES"...thanks Jonny...that meant alot
"Oh, say does that star spangled banner yet wave?"....Your damn right it does.
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