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Topic: WANTED: One Assassin (Read 401 times) |
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chewy
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The FBI had an opening for an assassin. After all the background checks, interviews and testing were done, there were 3 finalists. Two men and a woman.
For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. 'We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances. Inside the room you will find your wife sitting in a chair..
Kill Her!!'
The man said, 'You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife.' The agent said, 'Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home.'
The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his eyes, ' I tried, but I can't kill my wife.'
The agent said, 'You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.'
Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instruction, to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one
after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls
After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman, wiping the sweat from her brow. 'The gun is loaded with blanks' she
said. 'I had to beat him to death with the chair.'
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| « Last Edit: Aug 29th, 2007, 7:13am by chewy » |
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Rosybabe
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #1 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 10:17am » |
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 Believing is just the beginning!
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Mosaicwench
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Re: WANTED: One Assassin
« Reply #2 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 10:51am » |
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Ah, a Menopausal moment . . . .
I can relate!
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The difficulties of life are intended to make us better, not bitter. ~Author Unknown
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sldrswyfe
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #3 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 11:18am » |
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"Great spirits have always found violent
opposition from the mediocrities." -Einstein
"I'll DIE on MY FEET, before I LIVE on MY KNEES"...thanks Jonny...that meant alot
"Oh, say does that star spangled banner yet wave?"....Your damn right it does.
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clusterwife
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #4 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 1:32pm » |
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You men should be worried when a woman takes office. Imagine, period vacations, out-of-whack hollidays, 1 year leave for having children, and a whole state for women only. The men mess things up and we are here to take control. Girl-power!!!!
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Maybe through me he can find the truth, for I will always try.
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sldrswyfe
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #5 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 1:34pm » |
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 GIRL POWER!!!
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"Great spirits have always found violent
opposition from the mediocrities." -Einstein
"I'll DIE on MY FEET, before I LIVE on MY KNEES"...thanks Jonny...that meant alot
"Oh, say does that star spangled banner yet wave?"....Your damn right it does.
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sandie99
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #6 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 1:37pm » |
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Scared now, guys...?
Sanna
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"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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clusterwife
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #7 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 1:50pm » |
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It goes to show that women "handle"pain and discomfort better than our male counter-parts.....
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Maybe through me he can find the truth, for I will always try.
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sldrswyfe
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #8 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 2:01pm » |
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Amen Sister!!
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"Great spirits have always found violent
opposition from the mediocrities." -Einstein
"I'll DIE on MY FEET, before I LIVE on MY KNEES"...thanks Jonny...that meant alot
"Oh, say does that star spangled banner yet wave?"....Your damn right it does.
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Ray
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #9 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 2:10pm » |
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Yet another reason for men to have the final 2 words in any disagreement with their wives....
Ray
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You have my prayers and compassion-I'm right there with you.
Dum tempus habemus, operemur bonum
*While we have the time, let us do good*
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chewy
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #10 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 2:30pm » |
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My response to the Joke?
Typical woman. Cant follow instructions.
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sldrswyfe
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #11 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 2:32pm » |
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A respectful "touche"...we get the job done, no matter what it takes.
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"Great spirits have always found violent
opposition from the mediocrities." -Einstein
"I'll DIE on MY FEET, before I LIVE on MY KNEES"...thanks Jonny...that meant alot
"Oh, say does that star spangled banner yet wave?"....Your damn right it does.
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Charlie
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #12 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 8:00pm » |
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Charlie
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There is nothing more satisfying than being shot at without result---Winston Churchill
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sldrswyfe
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #13 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 8:12pm » |
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You get me every time with the smilies...and make me smile...even after a I just had a very bad phone call.
Thanks Charlie...
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"Great spirits have always found violent
opposition from the mediocrities." -Einstein
"I'll DIE on MY FEET, before I LIVE on MY KNEES"...thanks Jonny...that meant alot
"Oh, say does that star spangled banner yet wave?"....Your damn right it does.
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Sean_C
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #14 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 8:15pm » |
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ROTFLMMFAO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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PollyPocket
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #15 on: Aug 28th, 2007, 8:22pm » |
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on Aug 28th, 2007, 2:10pm, Ray wrote:Yet another reason for men to have the final 2 words in any disagreement with their wives....
Ray |
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We will allow you to live. Chewy on the other hand.............
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“Life is all about timing... the unreachable becomes reachable, the unavailable become available, the unattainable... attainable. Have the patience, wait it out It's all about timing.” - Stacey Charter
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sandie99
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #16 on: Aug 29th, 2007, 3:14am » |
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on Aug 28th, 2007, 2:32pm, sldrswyfe wrote:| A respectful "touche"...we get the job done, no matter what it takes. |
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Absolutely! She showed creativity; if the plan A fails, go to B.
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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Barry_T_Coles
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Re: WNATED: One Assassin
« Reply #17 on: Aug 29th, 2007, 3:58am » |
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on Aug 29th, 2007, 3:14am, sandie99 wrote:
Absolutely! She showed creativity; if the plan A fails, go to B. |
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Then on to C t h r o u g h t o Z.
Now ducking diving  zigging zagging  hiding 
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Worry is like a rocking chair it gives you something to do but gets you nowhere.
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luveemom
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Re: WANTED: One Assassin
« Reply #18 on: Aug 29th, 2007, 9:17am » |
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WOO HOO!!
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cash5542
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Re: WANTED: One Assassin
« Reply #19 on: Aug 30th, 2007, 8:15pm » |
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Umm Chewey, she DID follow instructions, typical male response, you didn't read the instructions either. She was told to KILL her husband (which she did) not to shoot him!
Actually I thought your response was good until my husband caught your mistake.
Charlotte
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chewy
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Re: WANTED: One Assassin
« Reply #20 on: Aug 30th, 2007, 8:57pm » |
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on Aug 30th, 2007, 8:15pm, cash5542 wrote:
Actually I thought your response was good until my husband caught your mistake.
Charlotte |
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Your husband huh?
Nice goin meathead! Your outta da union !
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