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Topic: Food for thought - Purina Diet (Read 398 times) |
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Callico
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Food for thought - Purina Diet
« on: Jan 19th, 2007, 12:52am » |
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I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina dog chow and was in line
to
check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog........ Duh!
I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her no, I was starting
The
Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I ended up in
the
hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an
intensive care unit with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and
IV's in
both arms. Her eyes about bugged out of her head.
I went on and on with the bogus diet story and she was totally buyi ng
it. I
told her that it was an easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it
works
is
to load your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or
two
every time you feel hungry. The package said the food is nutritionally
complete so I was going to try it again.
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now
enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind her.
Horrified,
she
asked if something in the dog food had poisoned me and was that why I
ended
up in the hospital.
I said no.....I'd been sitting in the street licking my butt when a car
hit
me.
I thought the tall guy was going to have to be carried out the door.
Jerry
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barry_sword
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Re: Food for thought - Purina Diet
« Reply #2 on: Jan 19th, 2007, 6:38am » |
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Barry
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QUIT SMOKING SEPT. 03 2005,
http://barrysword.blogspot.com
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vig
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Re: Food for thought - Purina Diet
« Reply #3 on: Jan 19th, 2007, 8:56am » |
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That's HILARIOUS Jerry...
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never, Never, NEVER quit. -Winston Churchill
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echo
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Re: Food for thought - Purina Diet
« Reply #4 on: Jan 19th, 2007, 9:23am » |
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That's great!! Darn funny.
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"If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back, hunt it down and kill it".
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floridian
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Re: Food for thought - Purina Diet
« Reply #6 on: Jan 19th, 2007, 1:56pm » |
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Cat food is better for a low-carb diet. More expensive, but I find myself eating less of it compared to the dog food.
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| « Last Edit: Jan 19th, 2007, 1:57pm by floridian » |
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Brew
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Re: Food for thought - Purina Diet
« Reply #7 on: Jan 19th, 2007, 2:00pm » |
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on Jan 19th, 2007, 1:56pm, floridian wrote:| Cat food is better for a low-carb diet. More expensive, but I find myself eating less of it compared to the dog food. |
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I also find it easier to clean my face and head with the back of my hand while on the cat food.
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Always remember that you're unique, just like everyone else.
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floridian
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Re: Food for thought - Purina Diet
« Reply #8 on: Jan 19th, 2007, 2:18pm » |
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And I get more done at home - I seem to lose all interest in television.
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vietvet2tours
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Re: Food for thought - Purina Diet
« Reply #9 on: Jan 19th, 2007, 2:37pm » |
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Get the wet kind with leetle squares of potatoes. Fried ya can't tell the difference from canned corned beef.
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echo
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Re: Food for thought - Purina Diet
« Reply #10 on: Jan 19th, 2007, 2:42pm » |
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I've always found that salmon in a cat food can make an awesome pre-made salmon patty.
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"If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back, hunt it down and kill it".
Proud Dad of a US Marine, and a former Marine turned Police Officer.
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Charlie
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Re: Food for thought - Purina Diet
« Reply #11 on: Jan 19th, 2007, 8:26pm » |
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Charlie 
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DonnaHar
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Re: Food for thought - Purina Diet
« Reply #12 on: Jan 19th, 2007, 10:58pm » |
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Sitting here with tears rolling down my cheeks and holding my stomach........
This is the funniest thing I've read in a while.
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sailpappy
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Re: Food for thought - Purina Diet
« Reply #13 on: Jan 19th, 2007, 11:10pm » |
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when I was in the hospital last time there was an elderly lady in the next room that had been eating Cat Food, she wasn't getting enough attention from her kids and this was her way of seeing to it that they took notice.
Apparently it wasn't the first time she had done it and the end result was an extreme digestive blowout, almost killed herself. so please dont ever eat cat food, it will not work for people, no matter what the nutritional lable says, its designed for animals and not human consumption. Unless you want to be hospitalized and made fun of by the entire hospital staff!
They sure chastized that lady behind her back!
Pappy
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