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Topic: Things that are difficult/Impossible (Read 305 times) |
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zwibbs/Scott
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Things that are difficult/Impossible
« on: Aug 19th, 2006, 8:46am » |
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THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:
Specificity
British Constitution
Passive-aggressive disorder
Loquacious Transubstantiate
THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:
Thanks, but I don't want to have sex
Nope, no more booze for me
Sorry, but you're not really my type
Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight
Oh, I just couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing.
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Paul98
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #1 on: Aug 19th, 2006, 8:53am » |
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You for got one:
I'm not drunk ossifer. Hic!
-P.
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BarbaraD
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Hugs to ya
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #2 on: Aug 19th, 2006, 9:39am » |
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Of course I can drive -- I'm too drunk to walk!! 
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Carl_D
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #3 on: Aug 20th, 2006, 3:15am » |
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You're not gonna check the trunk? COOL!
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sandie99
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #4 on: Aug 20th, 2006, 3:45am » |
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
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"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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George_J
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #5 on: Aug 20th, 2006, 3:47am » |
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on Aug 20th, 2006, 3:15am, Carl_D wrote:| You're not gonna check the trunk? COOL! |
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'Course, if all else fails, you can fall back on the classic.
Put your hands over your ears, and go:
"La, la, la, I can't hear you...."
Doesn't work, but it's a good try.
George
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Ah! The foreigners put on such airs
Wearing the tangerine suits
And their harlequin eyes.
The pain they inspire
Draws in harmonica melodies
And the feathers of birds
Which flame up at their touch.
It all comes to light in the sheer
Debonair.
(Ellen)
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Donna_D.
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #6 on: Aug 20th, 2006, 11:27am » |
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Try this one ten times real fast.
Cinnamony Sea Anemone
Better yet, ask KOP to say it 
DD
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The mad viking
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #7 on: Aug 20th, 2006, 11:33am » |
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Nothing is impossible,what seems impossible just takes a bit more time to solve 
Svenn
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Always Look on The Bright Side of Life
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Racer1_NC
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #8 on: Aug 20th, 2006, 5:48pm » |
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on Aug 20th, 2006, 11:33am, The mad viking wrote:| Nothing is impossible,what seems impossible just takes a bit more time to solve |
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Indeed.
B
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LeLimey
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #9 on: Aug 20th, 2006, 6:12pm » |
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on Aug 20th, 2006, 11:27am, Donna_D. wrote:Try this one ten times real fast.
Cinnamony Sea Anemone
Better yet, ask KOP to say it
DD |
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Donna, ask KOP to say two things for me.. he has a year to practise!
He rattles his bottles in Rollockses yard
and
I slit a sheet, a sheet I slit
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maffumatt
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #10 on: Aug 20th, 2006, 6:32pm » |
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I'm not as think as you drunk i am.
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chewy
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #11 on: Aug 20th, 2006, 8:08pm » |
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Wanna no what I do for a livin occiifer ?
I take small a#ssholes and strrreetch them inta big ones !
(Oh Really. And what do you do with them then?)
I put em at the end of a brwidge wit a wadar gun.
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| « Last Edit: Aug 20th, 2006, 8:09pm by chewy » |
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Azrael
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #12 on: Aug 20th, 2006, 8:12pm » |
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Take me drunk, I'm home!
PFDAN.......................................... ShadowLrd
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"Hello police? I would like to report a robbery. Someone stole all my beer while I was drunk."
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cootie
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #13 on: Aug 20th, 2006, 11:06pm » |
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It's all fun and games till the cops show up Pam
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Cause and Effect......"Cause is the effect concealed, Effect is the cause revealed"
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TomM
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #14 on: Aug 21st, 2006, 1:02pm » |
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on Aug 20th, 2006, 6:12pm, LeLimey wrote:I slit a sheet, a sheet I slit
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No shit?
TomM
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Brew
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #15 on: Aug 21st, 2006, 2:59pm » |
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As the officer approaches the car, lunge for the glovebox. He'll appreciate the hustle.
Or, my favorite:
As the officer approaches the car, say, "Make it snappy, fatso. I'm in a hurry."
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zwibbs/Scott
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #16 on: Aug 21st, 2006, 4:36pm » |
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Or simply ask the peace officer where the nearest "Dunkin Donuts" is.
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Jonny
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #17 on: Aug 21st, 2006, 5:10pm » |
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I am not the wheelbarrow man, officer
http://www.consumptionjunction.com/downloadsnew/cj_60077.wmv
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It is up to YOU to educate yourself and then help your doctor plan your treatment. If you just sit down in front of your doctor and say "make me better" you are setting yourself up for a great deal of pain.
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zwibbs/Scott
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Stay Strong !!!
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Re: Things that are difficult/Impossible
« Reply #18 on: Aug 21st, 2006, 5:12pm » |
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on Aug 21st, 2006, 5:10pm, Jonny wrote:
That's a riot----LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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