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Topic: What say you? (Read 584 times) |
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Jonny
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What say you?
« on: Aug 11th, 2006, 8:01pm » |
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Is this cruel parenting or some kind of teaching process?
http://www.consumptionjunction.com/downloadsnew/cj_59826.wmv
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It is up to YOU to educate yourself and then help your doctor plan your treatment. If you just sit down in front of your doctor and say "make me better" you are setting yourself up for a great deal of pain.
- Guiseppi
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maffumatt
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I say the kid will have very good problem solving abilities at an early age.
Matt
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tanner
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #2 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 8:19pm » |
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Attainable goal, Problem solving. I can see some benefit to such teaching methods but I would need to know just how long it lasts if the problem isn't solved and how encouraging the parent/ teacher is to make a decent judgement call.
Interesting!.......Tim
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I AM THE MASTER OF MY MIND, MY BODY, AND MY EMOTIONS...
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LeLimey
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #3 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 8:24pm » |
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Maybe if they had played fair by taking the kids socks off I'd be less disgusted.
Its all very well teaching kids to be independant, I'm all for that.. but that was a little baby, that was food (drink) which I don't believe in making a reward and it smacked of sadism to me.
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The arsehole I'm divorcing needs to get a life and stop stalking mine
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Jonny
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #4 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 8:33pm » |
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Im on the fence (so to speak) myself, you all bring up good points.
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It is up to YOU to educate yourself and then help your doctor plan your treatment. If you just sit down in front of your doctor and say "make me better" you are setting yourself up for a great deal of pain.
- Guiseppi
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Sean_C
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on Aug 11th, 2006, 8:33pm, Jonny wrote:| Im on the fence (so to speak) myself. |
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Its better than being behind the fence looking out 
Sean.................................
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E-Double
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #6 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 9:14pm » |
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on Aug 11th, 2006, 8:24pm, LeLimey wrote:Maybe if they had played fair by taking the kids socks off I'd be less disgusted.
Its all very well teaching kids to be independant, I'm all for that.. but that was a little baby, that was food (drink) which I don't believe in making a reward and it smacked of sadism to me. |
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It doesn't smack of sadism.......he went through a natural extinction burst and learned a skill.
They let his behavior progress through successive approximations.
It was shaped beautifully.
It would have been sadistic IF when he grabbed it she would have removed it or IF she would have given it to him once he started crying b/c he then would have learned to scream instead of to trouble shoot.
That is my professional opinion.
The new parent in me melted.
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I can't believe that I have to bang my
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But the blows they have just a little more
Space in-between them
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Sean_C
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That was very cool Eric
Sean.................................
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alchemy
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get out of my head
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #8 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 10:00pm » |
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I saw it as an attainable goal that required thought and effort. If it was dragged on to long or no encouragement given then it would be wrong. I thought it was a good puzzle to figure out.
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Margi
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #9 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 10:05pm » |
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Man, I dunno if I could do that to Savannah.
But I could have done it to Corinne...LOL....oops, was that out loud?
Honestly, I think it would have been better with a toy AND bare feet as Helen says. I don't think food should EVER be a reward for anything. I'd worry that it would maybe later lead to food addiction/eating disorder?
I'm just a softie for kids though. I think I'd cave.
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IMHO (which in my universe is correct)
kathy copelin, ch.com 8/8/06
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Sean_C
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on Aug 11th, 2006, 10:00pm, alchemy wrote:| I saw it as an attainable goal that required thought and effort. . |
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You ate your wheaties this mornin huh ROTFLMMFAO 
I agree
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alchemy
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get out of my head
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #11 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 10:08pm » |
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on Aug 11th, 2006, 10:05pm, Sean_C wrote:
You ate your wheaties this mornin huh ROTFLMMFAO
I agree
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Sean it was cheerios and someone pissed in them
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Margi
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #12 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 10:08pm » |
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ya think it was that pesky male coyote, Jim?
He might still be choked at you...
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http://askusaboutourgrandkids.photosite.com/
And, on the Eighth Day...God created Beer (to stop the Canadians from taking over the world)
source unknown
IMHO (which in my universe is correct)
kathy copelin, ch.com 8/8/06
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Ree
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #13 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 10:27pm » |
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What a gorgeous baby first of all... I just wanted that baby to pick up the bottle and throw it at the camera person.... imagine the frustration...One thing the video did prove is how smart a child this age really is... so those of you that have a child 12-18 months.....do not talk baby talk to them. I watch my daycare parents treat their kids like slugs and because I speak to them in adult english they can get things and understand me. Parents are amazed...I thought the lady was mean... I would have showed the baby how to get it after the stress started. ree
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Proud Mom to US ARMY Kiowa OH58 PILOT~CWO2 SCOTT Hawaii, & USMC Vet~Now POLICE OFFICER SEAN, Citizen of the Month~ Breezy~ Nana 4 Matt/Mike&Aya, MIL To Shino Wife to Dave HI BILL!http://www.myspace.com/dungareespocket http://www.prohawaiian.com
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Margi
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #14 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 10:34pm » |
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wholeheartedly agree with you, Ree. We, too, are a family in the No Baby Talk Zone, don't believe in it. I, too, would have showed that baby to come off the slide and put him down on the floor facing the bottle (I still would have replaced it with a toy), but still maybe make him crawl for it. Plant the idea in his head, but still make him make the end result happen himself.
That would have been priceless, though, if the babe had chucked the bottle at Evil Mother's head. 
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| « Last Edit: Aug 11th, 2006, 10:35pm by Margi » |
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http://askusaboutourgrandkids.photosite.com/
And, on the Eighth Day...God created Beer (to stop the Canadians from taking over the world)
source unknown
IMHO (which in my universe is correct)
kathy copelin, ch.com 8/8/06
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maffumatt
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I was wondering all the females were going to have a different answer than the men. It looks like its a gender thing?
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Ree
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #16 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 10:51pm » |
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on Aug 11th, 2006, 9:14pm, E-Double wrote:
It doesn't smack of sadism.......he went through a natural extinction burst and learned a skill.
They let his behavior progress through successive approximations.
It was shaped beautifully.
It would have been sadistic IF when he grabbed it she would have removed it or IF she would have given it to him once he started crying b/c he then would have learned to scream instead of to trouble shoot.
That is my professional opinion.
The new parent in me melted. |
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great point Eric remember this with your new baby... If you notice all the good behavior and do NOT reward that bad behavior you will be wayyyyyyyy ahead of the battle. Problem is its easier to see it when other people have it happening......and its really hard not to give in when you JUST WANT THAT BABY TO STOP CRYING. My daycare kids know that they don't get anything for bad behavior except time out... so they are always good for me... wish I knew all these secrets when I was bringing up spoiled Breezy.....
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Proud Mom to US ARMY Kiowa OH58 PILOT~CWO2 SCOTT Hawaii, & USMC Vet~Now POLICE OFFICER SEAN, Citizen of the Month~ Breezy~ Nana 4 Matt/Mike&Aya, MIL To Shino Wife to Dave HI BILL!http://www.myspace.com/dungareespockethttp://www.prohawaiian.com
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Jonny
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #17 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 11:03pm » |
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Careful, Ree.
The dude has a degree in Behavior
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It is up to YOU to educate yourself and then help your doctor plan your treatment. If you just sit down in front of your doctor and say "make me better" you are setting yourself up for a great deal of pain.
- Guiseppi
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E-Double
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #18 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 11:24pm » |
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on Aug 11th, 2006, 10:51pm, Ree wrote:
great point Eric remember this with your new baby... If you notice all the good behavior and do NOT reward that bad behavior you will be wayyyyyyyy ahead of the battle. Problem is its easier to see it when other people have it happening......and its really hard not to give in when you JUST WANT THAT BABY TO STOP CRYING. My daycare kids know that they don't get anything for bad behavior except time out... so they are always good for me... wish I knew all these secrets when I was bringing up spoiled Breezy.....
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Just keep in mind that if you are giving a timeout and you still see the behavior persist then it is the inappropriate treatment.
Timeout procedures are in actuality called Timeout from positive reinforcement and if the behavior is maintained by escape or avoidance then timeout would not be a punisher as it is defined. It would actually be negatively reinforcing the behavior.
Treatment HAS to match function.
Not saying you do this..........Timeouts are misused in so many damn schools and centers that I have observed and they wonder why the kid has been given 40+ timeouts in a month......wrong treatment. DOH!
It happens b/c many put morals or emotion into the equation and feel that it is less intrusive when they are inadvertantly making the behavior worse.
G-d I love this shit
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I can't believe that I have to bang my
Head against this wall again
But the blows they have just a little more
Space in-between them
Gonna take a breath and try again.
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E-Double
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
Are we ourselves?
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Posts: 6458
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #19 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 11:27pm » |
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on Aug 11th, 2006, 11:03pm, Jonny wrote:Careful, Ree.
The dude has a degree in Behavior |
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I can't believe that I have to bang my
Head against this wall again
But the blows they have just a little more
Space in-between them
Gonna take a breath and try again.
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Jonny
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
Give me a shovel Ill dig my own grave!
Gender:
Posts: 26213
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #20 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 11:36pm » |
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In my day it was a slap in the head and "Dont do that again"
I never killed anyone and never did jail time.
I say we go back to that....opppss, kids can now call the cops....sorry
What a fucked up world!
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It is up to YOU to educate yourself and then help your doctor plan your treatment. If you just sit down in front of your doctor and say "make me better" you are setting yourself up for a great deal of pain.
- Guiseppi
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E-Double
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Are we ourselves?
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #21 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 11:41pm » |
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on Aug 11th, 2006, 11:36pm, Jonny wrote:In my day it was a slap in the head and "Dont do that again"
I never killed anyone and never did jail time.
I say we go back to that....opppss, kids can now call the cops....sorry
What a fucked up world! |
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I do not disagree with you.
I think what we find is that when we incorporate emotion into the treatment, things get whacky.
The rule of thumb in treatment w/in my profession is that if we are going to start off using a punishment procedure it comes atcha hard and intense as opposed to milder forms then increasing .
the reason is b/c the effects of punishment although rapid are short lived and people/ the behavior habituates and a more intense punisher needs to be applied...........this is how abuse develops.
starts with a yell:>> then a small whack>> then as the child keeps upping ante>> the person/parent has to up it as well...........this occurs until a pattern of abuse has been developed and the only thing that works is the unfortunate.
If a whacking occured immediately and the appropriate behavior was then reinforced we'd all be angels
Don't even get me started on our legal system and why it does not work or how it could be improved......oh boy
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| « Last Edit: Aug 11th, 2006, 11:43pm by E-Double » |
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I can't believe that I have to bang my
Head against this wall again
But the blows they have just a little more
Space in-between them
Gonna take a breath and try again.
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Jonny
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
Give me a shovel Ill dig my own grave!
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Posts: 26213
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Re: What say you?
« Reply #22 on: Aug 11th, 2006, 11:51pm » |
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on Aug 11th, 2006, 11:41pm, E-Double wrote:| The rule of thumb in treatment w/in my profession is that if we are going to start off using a punishment procedure it comes atcha hard and intense as opposed to milder forms then increasing . |
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I guess my Dad had you beat years ago.....it was "If I have to tell you a third time "SMACK"
Three times and you got it!.....seems to me you got it backwards.
Thats whats wrong with this shit!!!!
Nite folks......PFDANS
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It is up to YOU to educate yourself and then help your doctor plan your treatment. If you just sit down in front of your doctor and say "make me better" you are setting yourself up for a great deal of pain.
- Guiseppi
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maffumatt
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at least you got a warning. I wasn't on my own at 15 for no reason. That is once cycle that I busted.
Matt
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Melissa
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(btw, Eli bit me on the shoulder tonight and I smacked him across his mouth while saying "Don't you EVER bite me!". I am not worried about him ever doing it again...)
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| « Last Edit: Aug 12th, 2006, 12:34am by Melissa » |
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