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Topic: Zen sarcasm (Read 161 times) |
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nani
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Zen sarcasm
« on: Apr 28th, 2006, 12:57pm » |
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1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.
2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.
3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
5. Always remember that you're unique- Just like everyone else.
6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
9. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.
14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
17. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.
20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
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Redd
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Re: Zen sarcasm
« Reply #1 on: Apr 28th, 2006, 1:03pm » |
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Quote:| 13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield. |
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In either case it's a lose/lose situation.... 
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I saw an act of faith today. A man was on his knees, not in a pew in a Church, but in a garden planting seeds. ~~Unknown
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pfunk
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Those are pretty good!
Pfunk
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medic1852
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Re: Zen sarcasm
« Reply #3 on: Apr 28th, 2006, 1:06pm » |
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I dont have favorite...I liked them all!
Rodger
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sandie99
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Re: Zen sarcasm
« Reply #4 on: Apr 28th, 2006, 1:11pm » |
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Those were brilliant, thanks!
Sanna
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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Richr8
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Re: Zen sarcasm
« Reply #5 on: Apr 28th, 2006, 1:27pm » |
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Great stuff! Thanks Nani.
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pf wishes,
Rich
...because yesterday is history and you never know what tomorrow will bring.
"Med free"- A few seeds and lots of O2-LG but not great.
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pattik
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Re: Zen sarcasm
« Reply #6 on: Apr 28th, 2006, 1:38pm » |
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Thanks, Nani...I collect Zen humor....here's another:
Q: How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A': Two: one to change the bulb and one not to change it.
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The voyage of discovery is not about seeking new landscapes, it's about having new eyes--Marcel Proust
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