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Topic: Friday Night Funnys, Caution! (Read 146 times) |
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medic1852
CH.com Alumnus
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This will only hurt for a little while!
 
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Friday Night Funnys, Caution!
« on: Apr 14th, 2006, 7:23pm » |
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I hope that each of you find something on here that will put a smile on your face...The caution is for the video links at the bottom, Some are not appropriate for the kiddos.. but they are all funny.
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I went to the doctor for my yearly physical. The nurse starts
with certain basics.
How much do you weigh?" she asks.
"115," I say. The nurse puts me on the scale. It turns out my weight is
140.
The nurse asks, "Your height?" "5 foot 8," I say.
The nurse checks and sees that I only measure 5' 5".
She then takes my blood pressure and tells me it is very high.
"Of course it's high!" I scream, "When I came in here I was tall
and slender! Now I'm short and fat!"
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Water and Wine Education
WATER...... It has been scientifically proven that if we drink 1 litre of water each day,
at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli bacteria
found in feces, in other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of Doo Doo.
However, we do not run that risk when drinking wine (or rum, whiskey, beer or other liquors)
because alcohol has to go through a distillation process of boiling, filtering and fermenting.
WATER = Doo Doo
WINE = HEALTH
Free yourself of Doo Doo, drink WINE!!!
It is better to drink wine and talk Doo Doo than to drink water and be full of shit.
There is no need to thank me for this valuable information,
I am doing it as a public service.
Have a nice day...
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Living will
Me and my better half were sitting in the living room and I said to
her,
" Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state,
dependent on
some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just
pull the
plug."
She got up, unplugged the TV, and threw out all my beer .
Bitch !
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Grandma and Grandpa were visiting their kids overnight. When Grandpa found a bottle of Viagra in his son's medicine cabinet, he asked about using one of the pills.
The son said, "I don't think you should take one Dad; they're very strong and very expensive."
"How much?" asked Grandpa.
"$10.00 a pill," answered the son.
"I don't care," said Grandpa, "I'd still like to try one, and before we leave in the morning, I'll put the money under the pillow."
Later the next morning, the son found $110.00 under the pillow. He called Grandpa and said "I told you each pill was $10.00, not $110.00."
I know," said Grandpa.........."The hundred is from Grandma."
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http://www.davidbessler.com/pulldown/pipecleaner_dance.html
http://media.putfile.com/va-y-avoir-du-sport
http://media.putfile.com/Funny-Cats-Compilation
http://media.putfile.com/PianoBrothers
http://media.putfile.com/cantstoplaughing
Rodger
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Shoot Low Sherrif He's Riding a Sheltland Pony!
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Guiseppi
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Re: Friday Night Funnys, Caution!
« Reply #1 on: Apr 14th, 2006, 8:23pm » |
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I'm no cat lover but the cat video is too damned funny!!!
Guiseppi
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Why are all sensors, seeking intelligent life, pointed AWAY from earth?
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Jonny
CH.com Alumnus
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Give me a shovel Ill dig my own grave!
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Re: Friday Night Funnys, Caution!
« Reply #2 on: Apr 14th, 2006, 9:01pm » |
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May I add to the funny?
http://livedigital.com/content/6197/p4
Funny dude, RIP Mitch!
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It is up to YOU to educate yourself and then help your doctor plan your treatment. If you just sit down in front of your doctor and say "make me better" you are setting yourself up for a great deal of pain.
- Guiseppi
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medic1852
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
This will only hurt for a little while!
Gender:
Posts: 923
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Re: Friday Night Funnys, Caution!
« Reply #3 on: Apr 14th, 2006, 9:17pm » |
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You can never have too many funnies Jonny!
Rodger
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Shoot Low Sherrif He's Riding a Sheltland Pony!
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