Author |
Topic: Too good not to list here... (Read 243 times) |
|
Melissa
Guest
|
THINGS THAT HALLMARK CARDS DON'T SAY
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat
When I looked at the tire...
I noticed your cat.
Sorry!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Heard your wife left you,
How upset you must be.
But don't fret about it...
She moved in with me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Looking back over the years
that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder...
"What the hell was I thinking?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I've always wanted to have
someone to hold,
someone to love.
After having met you ..
I've changed my mind.
-------------------------------------- ---------------------------------
Imust admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.
// /////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me.
####################################
Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...
Would you like to take this knife out of my back?
You'll probably need it again.
**********************************************
Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!
(Available only inTennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Happy birthday! You look great for your age.
Almost Lifelike!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When we were together,
you always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up,
I think it's time you kept your promise.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
We have been friends for a very long time ..
let's say we stop?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I'm so miserable without you
it's almost like you're here.
========================================
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was?
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
Your friends and I wanted to do
something special for your birthday.
So we're having you put to sleep.
)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) )
So your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoiled your day.
Look at the bright side,
it's really good pay.
|
| « Last Edit: Mar 11th, 2006, 8:59am by Melissa » |
 IP Logged |
|
|
|
medic1852
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
This will only hurt for a little while!
 
Gender: 
Posts: 923
|
 |
Re: Too good not to list here...
« Reply #1 on: Mar 11th, 2006, 8:50am » |
 Quote  Modify
|
Too funny!!
|
|
IP Logged |
Shoot Low Sherrif He's Riding a Sheltland Pony!
|
|
|
Lizzie2
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
"L'Chaim"~Hebre w Toast~"To Life"
Gender: 
Posts: 4458
|
|
Re: Too good not to list here...
« Reply #2 on: Mar 11th, 2006, 8:55am » |
Quote Modify
|
Quote:Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was? |
|
Oh dear...that one would be popular where I work.....shhhhh!!
LOL
|
|
IP Logged |
|
|
|
pattik
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
Gender:
Posts: 2404
|
|
Re: Too good not to list here...
« Reply #3 on: Mar 11th, 2006, 9:38am » |
Quote Modify
|
Quote: Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!
(Available only inTennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia) |
|
|
|
IP Logged |
The voyage of discovery is not about seeking new landscapes, it's about having new eyes--Marcel Proust
|
|
|
LeLimey
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
OUCH-US - Less "ME" and more "WE"
Gender:
Posts: 11720
|
|
Re: Too good not to list here...
« Reply #4 on: Mar 11th, 2006, 6:47pm » |
Quote Modify
|
I won't list my favourites.. you can guess! LMAO - Thanks Melly moo they are brilliant!
|
|
IP Logged |
The arsehole I'm divorcing needs to get a life and stop stalking mine
|
|
|
Kirk
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
VINIMUS, VIDIMUS, DOLAVIMUS
   
Gender:
Posts: 1914
|
|
Re: Too good not to list here...
« Reply #5 on: Mar 12th, 2006, 1:32am » |
Quote Modify
|
Thanks that really helped my attitude this evewning Mel.
|
|
IP Logged |
|
|
|
sandie99
New Board Hall of Famer
Wish it, dream it, do it - inspite the pain!
Gender:
Posts: 10429
|
|
Re: Too good not to list here...
« Reply #6 on: Mar 12th, 2006, 7:53am » |
Quote Modify
|
Thanks, Mel! 
Best wishes,
Sanna
|
|
IP Logged |
CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
|
|
|
Ghost
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
Farting relieves the pressure
Gender:
Posts: 4024
|
|
Re: Too good not to list here...
« Reply #7 on: Mar 13th, 2006, 9:44am » |
Quote Modify
|
My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat
When I looked at the tire...
I noticed your cat.
Sorry!
Ok you guessed mine I bet!!!!!
Mike
|
|
IP Logged |
Illigitimus Non Tatum Carborundum
If all men are endowed by their creator, why was mine so short sighted?
***WARNING*** Oxygen will rust your pipes!
|
|
|
ABarham
New Board Veteran
I love YaBB 1G - SP1!
Gender:
Posts: 138
|
|
Re: Too good not to list here...
« Reply #8 on: Mar 13th, 2006, 9:51am » |
Quote Modify
|
Funny, Funny, Funny - What a great way to start a Monday morning. (I hate Mondays).
Mama Weezer
|
|
IP Logged |
Louise
Mother of CH son
|
|
|
|
|
|
Home
Help
Search
Members
Member Map
Login
Register
Reply
Notify of replies
Send Topic
Print
Remove
test rss