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Topic: Investiment Tips for 2006 (Read 231 times) |
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Jimi
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Investiment Tips for 2006
« on: Feb 2nd, 2006, 11:55pm » |
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2006 Investment tips
For all of you with any money left in the wake of Christmas,
the Exxon/Mobil deal, the AOL/Time Warner implosion,
and the Sears/K-Mart wedding, be aware of the next expected
mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks.
Watch for these consolidations in the near future:
1. Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller
Brush, and W. R. Grace Company will merge and become:
Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace
2. Polygram Records, Warner Brothers, and Zesta
Crackers join forces and become: Poly, Warner, Cracker
3. 3M will merge with Goodyear and issue forth as:
MMMGood
4. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and
Dakota Mining wll merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa
5. FedEx is expected to join its major competitor,
UPS, and become: FedUP
6. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers
will become: Fairwell Honeychild
7. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to
become: Poupon Pants
8. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization
of Women will become: KnottNOW!
I still think prostution is the best investment You got it you sell it and you still got it!
Happy investing!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
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I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.
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Jasmyn
CH.com Alumnus
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Each day will be a new trick in life's journey
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Re: Investiment Tips for 2006
« Reply #1 on: Feb 3rd, 2006, 2:55am » |
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Chewy's got some money coming. I think he might wanna invest in Poupon Pants and KnottNow but then again he's already into prostration with some plastic people, so I would venture that his investment is definitely secure 
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Jazz
Madness is proclaimed by society’s inability to accept its own infallibility
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sandie99
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Re: Investiment Tips for 2006
« Reply #2 on: Feb 3rd, 2006, 3:26am » |
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 Those tips sound MMMgood!
Sanna
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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AussieBrian
New Board Hall of Famer
Got beer?
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Posts: 1695
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Re: Investiment Tips for 2006
« Reply #3 on: Feb 3rd, 2006, 3:52am » |
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My mum put a thousand dollars into HIH shares and has $6.54 to show for it. My brother put a thousand bucks into the great Telstra sell-off round 1 and now owns the princely sum $11.43. My cousin had a grand in Enron which magically converted itself to a debt of $4.36.
I bought a thousand dollars worth of beer, had a great time while meeting interesting people and scores of beautiful women, and sold the empty cans to a re-cycle plant for $36.97, thank you.
Looking for investment advice? You know my address and the price is right.
Door's open,
Brian.
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Vulcrania horrendus - twice daily, then two at night in lieu of sleep.
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Jasmyn
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
Each day will be a new trick in life's journey
Gender:
Posts: 2762
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Re: Investiment Tips for 2006
« Reply #4 on: Feb 3rd, 2006, 4:01am » |
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on Feb 3rd, 2006, 3:52am, AussieBrian wrote:
I bought a thousand dollars worth of beer, had a great time while meeting interesting people and scores of beautiful women, and sold the empty cans to a re-cycle plant for $36.97, thank you.
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Yip Mr Brain you've got the right and left attitude. People surely become more interesting and - in my case - men seem more handsome after a few.
Recycling pays
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Jazz
Madness is proclaimed by society’s inability to accept its own infallibility
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