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Topic: Cultural differences (Read 377 times) |
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burnt-toast
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Cultural differences
« on: Jul 15th, 2005, 2:47pm » |
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An American woman wants to get married, but she is only willing to marry a man if he has never been with another woman. After years of unsuccessful searching she takes out a personal ad and ends up corresponding with a man who has lived his entire life in the Australian outback.
One thing leads to another and over time they end up meeting, falling in love and getting married. On their wedding night, she goes into the bathroom to make sure she is perfect for her wonderful new husband. When she returns to the bedroom, she finds her husband standing in the middle of the room, naked, with all the furniture piled in one corner.
"What's going on..... what happened?" she asks.
"I've never been with a woman," he explains, "but if you're anything like me kangaroo, we're gonna need all the open space we can get!"
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| « Last Edit: Jul 15th, 2005, 4:22pm by burnt-toast » |
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Would the owner of the propane torch, egg beater, pipe expander and vise grips please claim these items. They're lodged in my head and I need the space.
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AussieBrian
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #1 on: Jul 15th, 2005, 8:04pm » |
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Greetings from Down Under.
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Vulcrania horrendus - twice daily, then two at night in lieu of sleep.
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burnt-toast
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #2 on: Jul 16th, 2005, 11:13am » |
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on Jul 15th, 2005, 8:04pm, AussieBrian wrote:| Greetings from Down Under. |
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Forgive me but I immediately thought of posting this one for ya' when I came across it.
Got the old double eye roll from the wife when she read this one.
Tom
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| « Last Edit: Jul 16th, 2005, 11:15am by burnt-toast » |
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Would the owner of the propane torch, egg beater, pipe expander and vise grips please claim these items. They're lodged in my head and I need the space.
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AussieBrian
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #3 on: Jul 16th, 2005, 7:19pm » |
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on Jul 16th, 2005, 11:13am, burnt-toast wrote:| Forgive me but I immediately thought of posting this one for ya' when I came across it. |
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No worries, mate, but please understand there's no truth in the old story that we do it by pushing one of the kanga's legs down each of our gum-boots.
I mean, I've tried it that way. How can you kiss them?
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sandie99
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #4 on: Jul 17th, 2005, 2:42am » |
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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BMoneeTheMoneeMan
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #5 on: Jul 22nd, 2005, 4:27pm » |
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There is a respected right wing pro-lifer names Neal Horsley and he said he used to have sex with animals. When Alan Colmes said "surely you arent saying....", he got offended, and said that everyone that grows up in Georgia has sex with animals.
I guess, among the religious right, having sex with animals is totally accepted. Seems weird, i know
But its true
BMonee
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"Fool me once, shame on, shame on you. Fool - can't get fooled again"
Think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize half the population is stupider than that.
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AussieBrian
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #6 on: Jul 22nd, 2005, 9:38pm » |
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You just gotta run real fast to get a good-looking one.
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giffy76
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #7 on: Jul 26th, 2005, 8:50am » |
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That's just dirty.
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Jeepgun
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BOHICA!!!
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #8 on: Jul 26th, 2005, 10:26am » |
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on Jul 22nd, 2005, 9:38pm, AussieBrian wrote:| You just gotta run real fast to get a good-looking one. |
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Marsupial Molestation Makes Me Mad!! Please join the M.M.M.M.M. today.
Mmmmmmm...... Marsupials...
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?"
Me: "What, like, in the FACE?"
Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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AussieBrian
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #9 on: Jul 26th, 2005, 10:19pm » |
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Mmmmmmmmmmm alright. Better than cats. One got it's back legs out of the bag once.
It was a girl cat, of course. Nothing weird about me.
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mynm156
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #10 on: Jul 26th, 2005, 11:27pm » |
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LETS GET READY TO RUMBLE!!!!!
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"Half of the modern drugs could well be thrown out of the window, except that the birds might eat them."
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Jeepgun
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BOHICA!!!
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #11 on: Jul 27th, 2005, 7:51am » |
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ROFLMAO!!
"Brace yerself, Sheila." 
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?"
Me: "What, like, in the FACE?"
Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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burnt-toast
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #12 on: Jul 27th, 2005, 2:02pm » |
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I liked it better when AB was messin' on critters his own size.
It ain't hard to bring sizeable critters in with a salt lick. All ya' needs to do then is keep yer' boots close by.
Not that I'd know anything about it or anything like that.
Tom
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Would the owner of the propane torch, egg beater, pipe expander and vise grips please claim these items. They're lodged in my head and I need the space.
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AussieBrian
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Posts: 1695
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #13 on: Jul 27th, 2005, 11:43pm » |
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on Jul 27th, 2005, 2:02pm, burnt-toast wrote:| I liked it better when AB was messin' on critters his own size. |
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You haven't met She-Who-Must-Be-Obeyed!
And as for Aussie foreplay, it's "Eh. You awake?"
Decent, sensitive and caring blokes like myself, of course, usually wait for a reply.
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Vulcrania horrendus - twice daily, then two at night in lieu of sleep.
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Jeepgun
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BOHICA!!!
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Re: Cultural differences
« Reply #14 on: Jul 28th, 2005, 8:54am » |
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BWAHAHAHA!!!!!
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?"
Me: "What, like, in the FACE?"
Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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