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Topic: Heavenly Transportation (Read 245 times) |
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burnt-toast
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Heavenly Transportation
« on: Jul 4th, 2005, 8:13am » |
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Three guys died and when St. Peter met them at the pearly gates, he said, "You gentlemen are forgiven for your earthly indescretions, but before I let you into Heaven, I have to ask you some things. Everyone has to have transportation in Heaven because it is so big. The kind of transportation you receive will depend on your answers."
The first guy walked up and St. Peter asked him, "How long were you married?" He answered, "24 years." "Did you ever cheat on your wife?", St. Peter asked. The guy said, "Yeah, 7 times ... but you said I was forgiven." St. Peter said, "Yes, but that's not too good. You may drive a Hugo."
The second guy walked up and got the same questions from St. Peter. He answered, "I was married for 41 years" and "cheated only once, but that was our first year and we really worked it out." St. Peter said, "I'm pleased to hear that. You may drive a Lincoln."
The third guy walked up and said, "St. Peter, I know what you're going to ask. I was married for 63 years and didn't even look at another woman! I treated my wife like a queen!" St. Peter said, "That's such devotion, here's a Jaguar!"
A few days later, the first two guys with the Hugo and Lincoln see the guy with the Jaguar - its wrecked, he's surrounded by heavenly police and he's crying on the golden sidewalk. When they asked him what was wrong, he sobs, "I getting thrown out of Heaven".
Why they ask, "you led such a devoted life".
"Well", he replies, "I just ran over my wife......
she was riding a skateboard!"
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Would the owner of the propane torch, egg beater, pipe expander and vise grips please claim these items. They're lodged in my head and I need the space.
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Langa
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So many donuts, such little time...
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Re: Heavenly Transportation
« Reply #1 on: Jul 4th, 2005, 2:01pm » |
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good one!
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When you saw only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.
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