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Topic: Men Shopping ? (Read 431 times) |
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Redneck
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WIFE MART
A store that sells wives opens in Dallas, TX, where a man may go to
choose a wife from among MANY women. The store is comprised of 6 floors,
and the women increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch: As you open the door to any floor you may choose a wife from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building--no stopping on any lower floors.
A man goes to the shopping center to find a wife. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These women have jobs. The man reads the sign and says to himself, "Well, that's better than my last girlfriend, but I wonder what's further up?" So up he goes.
The second floor sign reads:
Floor 2 - These women have jobs, love sports, and drink beer. The man smiles to himself, "That's great, but I wonder what's further up?"
The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These women have jobs, love sports, drink beer, and are extremely good looking. "Hmmm, better!" he says. "But I wonder what's upstairs?"
The fourth floor sign reads:
Floor 4 - These women have jobs, love sports, drink beer, ar extremely good looking and do all the housework. "Wow!" exclaims the man, "very tempting. BUT, there must be more, much more, further up!" He heads up another flight.
The fifth floor sign reads:
Floor 5 - These women have jobs, love sports, drink beer, are
extremely good looking, do all the housework and don't bitch and gripe about anything.
"Hot Damn!..how close to perfect can you get?.. But just think...what must be awaiting me further on?" So up to the sixth floor he goes.
The sixth floor sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 133,956,779,012 to this floor. There
are no women on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that men are
impossible to please.
Thank you for shopping Wife Mart, and have a nice day.
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Ghost
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Farting relieves the pressure
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #1 on: Feb 23rd, 2005, 6:52pm » |
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shoot id settle for the 1st floor
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Illigitimus Non Tatum Carborundum
If all men are endowed by their creator, why was mine so short sighted?
***WARNING*** Oxygen will rust your pipes!
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Langa
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So many donuts, such little time...
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #2 on: Feb 23rd, 2005, 6:54pm » |
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One of the best I've read in a while...thanks! 
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When you saw only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.
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LeLimey
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OUCH-US - Less "ME" and more "WE"
 
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #3 on: Feb 23rd, 2005, 7:17pm » |
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Thank you for my first laugh of Thursday
How do I get snot off my screen?
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The arsehole I'm divorcing needs to get a life and stop stalking mine
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Langa
CH.com Alumnus
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So many donuts, such little time...
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Posts: 4179
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #4 on: Feb 23rd, 2005, 7:20pm » |
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Helen, I could relate...windex worked pretty good...
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When you saw only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.
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Ghost
CH.com Alumnus
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Farting relieves the pressure
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Posts: 4024
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #5 on: Feb 23rd, 2005, 7:36pm » |
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on Feb 23rd, 2005, 7:17pm, LeLimey wrote:Thank you for my first laugh of Thursday
How do I get snot off my screen? |
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Illigitimus Non Tatum Carborundum
If all men are endowed by their creator, why was mine so short sighted?
***WARNING*** Oxygen will rust your pipes!
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sandie99
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Wish it, dream it, do it - inspite the pain!
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #7 on: Feb 24th, 2005, 1:25am » |
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And they say we're choosy.... 
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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Jeepgun
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BOHICA!!!
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #8 on: Feb 24th, 2005, 9:13am » |
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I'm still looking for the floor that has these kind of women:
"Doesn't hate sex."
Oh well...
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| « Last Edit: Feb 24th, 2005, 9:14am by Jeepgun » |
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?"
Me: "What, like, in the FACE?"
Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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vietvet2tours
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #9 on: Feb 24th, 2005, 9:55am » |
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After more failed marriages than I cared to admit my best friend told me I should just find a woman that hated me and buy her a house.
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Kill em all let God sort em out
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mynm156
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hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #10 on: Feb 24th, 2005, 4:45pm » |
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I guess there R no perfect women 
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"Half of the modern drugs could well be thrown out of the window, except that the birds might eat them."
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Langa
CH.com Alumnus
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So many donuts, such little time...
Gender:
Posts: 4179
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #11 on: Feb 24th, 2005, 6:21pm » |
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on Feb 24th, 2005, 9:55am, vietvet2tours wrote:| After more failed marriages than I cared to admit my best friend told me I should just find a woman that hated me and buy her a house. |
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Get rid of your friend...
Langa
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When you saw only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.
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AussieBrian
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Got beer?
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #12 on: Feb 24th, 2005, 10:52pm » |
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Rather than just finding a woman you hate and buying her a house, find a woman with whom you can happily spend the rest of your life and marry one of her daughters.
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Vulcrania horrendus - twice daily, then two at night in lieu of sleep.
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Bethany1
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Always do whatever's next.
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #13 on: Feb 25th, 2005, 10:58am » |
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on Feb 24th, 2005, 10:52pm, AussieBrian wrote:| marry one of her daughters. |
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I am sofa king we todd did.
crack is wack
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vietvet2tours
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Team MOOSE DROOL Stinky Stuff on a Hook Prostaff
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #14 on: Feb 28th, 2005, 6:16pm » |
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Not a woman I hate a woman that hates me. on Feb 24th, 2005, 10:52pm, AussieBrian wrote:| Rather than just finding a woman you hate and buying her a house, find a woman with whom you can happily spend the rest of your life and marry one of her daughters. |
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| « Last Edit: Feb 28th, 2005, 6:17pm by vietvet2tours » |
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Kill em all let God sort em out
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Jerry_b
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I love YaBB 1G - SP1!
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #15 on: Mar 2nd, 2005, 2:31pm » |
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on Feb 23rd, 2005, 7:17pm, LeLimey wrote:Thank you for my first laugh of Thursday
How do I get snot off my screen? |
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Yu god id doo, huh? (sniff)
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jokrs2
New Board Old Timer
Eventually He will make us pain free!
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Re: Men Shopping ?
« Reply #16 on: Mar 2nd, 2005, 6:45pm » |
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You all are making my day!!!
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Given strength, courage & a sound mind!
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