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Topic: Politically Correct Male (Read 462 times) |
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Redd
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Politically Correct Male
« on: Jan 21st, 2005, 7:09am » |
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Guide to Politically Correct Guys
He does not have a beer gut; he develops a Liquid Grain Storage Facility.
He is not quiet; he is a Conversational Minimalist.
He does not have a fabulous rear end; he has achieved Buttocks Perfection.
He is not stupid; he suffers from Minimal Cranial Development.
He does not get lost all the time; he discovers Alternative Destinations.
He is not balding; he is in Follicle Regression.
You do not buy him a drink; you initiate an Alcohol-For-Conversation Exchange.
He does not fart and belch; he is Gastronomically Expressive.
His jeans are not too tight; he is Anatomically Undercirculated.
He is not a redneck; he is a Genetically-Related American.
You do not kiss him; you become Facially Conjoined.
He is not a cradle robber; he prefers Generationally Differential Relationships.
He does not get falling-down drunk; he becomes Accidentally Horizontal.
He does not act like a total ass; he develops a Case Of Rectal-Cranial Inversion.
He is not short - he is Anatomically Compact.
He does not have a rich daddy; he is a Recipient Of Parental Asset Infusion.
He does not constantly talk about cars; he has a Vehicular Addiction.
He does not have a hot body; he is Physically Combustible.
He is not unsophisticated; he is Socially Malformed.
He does not eat like a pig; he suffers from Reverse Bulimia.
He does not hog the blankets; he is Thermally Unappreciative.
He is not a sex machine; he is Romantically Automated.
He is not a male chauvinist pig; he has Swine Empathy.
You do not undress him with your eyes; you have an Introspective Pornographic Moment.
He is not afraid of commitment; he is Monogamously Challenged.
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I saw an act of faith today. A man was on his knees, not in a pew in a Church, but in a garden planting seeds. ~~Unknown
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Langa
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So many donuts, such little time...
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Re: Politically Correct Male
« Reply #1 on: Jan 21st, 2005, 9:13am » |
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Good one! 
And my favorite:
Quote:| He does not fart and belch; he is Gastronomically Expressive. |
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When you saw only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.
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sandie99
New Board Hall of Famer
Wish it, dream it, do it - inspite the pain!
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Re: Politically Correct Male
« Reply #2 on: Jan 21st, 2005, 1:02pm » |
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Good one, thanks! 
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