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Topic: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny (Read 510 times) |
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pattik
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Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« on: Oct 5th, 2005, 2:38pm » |
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It's official today
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The voyage of discovery is not about seeking new landscapes, it's about having new eyes--Marcel Proust
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nani
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #1 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 2:42pm » |
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He loves us. He really loves us! Happy Anniversary, Bro!!! nani
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Others may come and go, but MY power is MINE.
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Jeepgun
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #2 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 2:46pm » |
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I was going to send you some beer Jonny, but I drank it all. BarrrrrrrrrrrrrruuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRPP!!! Ahhhh!!! It was tasty, though. Appy Hanniversary!
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?" Me: "What, like, in the FACE?" Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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Jonny
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #3 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 2:47pm » |
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on Oct 5th, 2005, 2:42pm, nani wrote:He loves us. He really loves us! |
| Your all FREAKS!! Kinda nice to be King Freak.....LMAO Thanks, I knew the day I washed up here that I would never leave, PF or not!!
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It is up to YOU to educate yourself and then help your doctor plan your treatment. If you just sit down in front of your doctor and say "make me better" you are setting yourself up for a great deal of pain.
- Guiseppi
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Ghost
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #4 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 3:06pm » |
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This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years. The only friction in their marriage was Jonny's habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air. Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out. The years went by and he continued to blast them out! Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where Jonny was sound asleep and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts. Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good. About twenty minutes later, Jonny came downstairs in his bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter. He said, "Honey, you were right. All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you." "What do you mean?" asked his wife. "Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened. But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and two fingers, I think I got most of them back in." So is it true did you get them all back in jonny?
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Illigitimus Non Tatum Carborundum If all men are endowed by their creator, why was mine so short sighted?
***WARNING*** Oxygen will rust your pipes!
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Jonny
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #5 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 3:20pm » |
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on Oct 5th, 2005, 3:06pm, ghost62 wrote: So is it true did you get them all back in jonny? |
| Ok, I see this is going to turn into a "Roast Jonny" thread. By all means, give it your best shot But, keep in mind that getting extremely personal could be bad for your health
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It is up to YOU to educate yourself and then help your doctor plan your treatment. If you just sit down in front of your doctor and say "make me better" you are setting yourself up for a great deal of pain.
- Guiseppi
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ExplodingEyeBall
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #6 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 3:28pm » |
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Roast??? No way. Slow cooking makes the meat so much more tender. Happy anniversary!!!
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Just poke out my eye and get it over with!!!
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Langa
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #7 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 3:56pm » |
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Quote:Roast??? No way. Slow cooking makes the meat so much more tender. |
| That's what i'm talkin bout! Happy Anniversary my Luv! Langa
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LeLimey
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #8 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 4:01pm » |
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on Oct 5th, 2005, 3:20pm, Jonny wrote: But, keep in mind that getting extremely personal could be bad for your health |
| Oh I'll risk it!! Little Jonny's is coming home from the store swinging a loaf of bread in one hand, and the other hand in his pants pocket. Along come Priest Joe and he thinks to himself, "This is a good opportunity to say something from the bible to Little Jonny." He walks up to Little Jonny and says, "I see, Little Jonny, that you have the Staff of Life in one hand. What do you have in the other?" Little Jonny replies, "A loaf of bread, Father." A father asks his 10-year-old son, little Johnny, if he knows about the birds and the bees. "I don't want to know," little Jonny says, bursting into tears. "Promise me you won't tell me?" Confused, the father asks what's wrong. "Oh, dad," little Jonny sobs, "when I was six, I got the 'There's no Santa' speech. At seven, I got the 'There's no Easter Bunny' speech. When I was eight, you hit me with the 'There's no tooth fairy' speech. If you're going to tell me that adults don't really fuck, I'll have nothing left to live for." A boy sitting on Santas lap and Santa puts his finger on the boys nose and says "I bet your name is (spells out ) J o n n y ?" The little boys eyes light up and Santa puts his finger on the boys nose again and says " I bet you want a (spelled out ) b i k e ?" Little Jonnys eyes light up and he asks "How'd you know that ?" Santa replied "Because I'm Santa I know everything". Little Jonny gets a funny look in his eye and says "I bet you like (spells out ) g i r l s ?" Santa says "Yes, how'd you know that ?" Jonny says " Because your finger smells like P U S S Y !" One night Little Jonny was really scared sleeping by himself at camp, so he sprints out of his tent and runs to his teachers tent and asks "Miss can I please sleep with you tonight ?". His teacher replies "NO" Jonny moans and says "But my mummy lets me". "OK then, just for tonight" the teacher replies. Jonny jumps into bed with her and asks "Miss can I please play with your belly button with my finger". She again says "NO". "But my mummy lets me" says Jonny again. "Well I suppose it's OK" replies the teacher. Things are silent for a few minutes until the teacher leaps up screaming "THAT'S NOT MY BELLY BUTTON" Little Jonny replies "It aint my finger either". One day a lady from the church had come over and had given a gift for all the wonderful sermons that her husband has given. Jonny's mom had said, "Thank you very much but what is it?" The lady said, "It is a Damn ham." Jonny's mom looked shocked and said, "Don't speak that way to me, don't you know that I am the preachers wife!" The lady said, "Yes, yes I know, but that is the brand name of the ham!" Jonny's mom said, "ooh I see well thank you" and the lady left. Later that night when Jonny's mom was cooking dinner the preacher came into the kitchen and said, "Mmmm! That smells really good! What is it?" Jonny's mom said," Well thats your dinner tonight, some Damn Ham" The preacher was shocked and said, "Don't speak to me that way! Don't you know who I am?" Jonny's mom said, "Yes, yes! I know who you are! It is just the brand name!" The preacher said, "Oh! I see! Well it smells great!" That night when dinner was ready she had set it out on the table. The corn, mashed potatoes, rolls, and ham! When the family sat down they said their prayers and began to eat. The preacher said to his wife, "Could you please pass me some of that Damn ham?" The wife said "sure". Then little Jonny said, "Alright dad! While you're at it can you pass me the fucking mashed potatoes!" I have another one but its too much to post here so if anyone wants to see my ultimate Jonny joke im me! Oh and Jonny... I love ya really!!
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Jeepgun
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #9 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 4:10pm » |
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LMAO!!
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?" Me: "What, like, in the FACE?" Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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Jonny
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #10 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 4:11pm » |
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on Oct 5th, 2005, 4:01pm, LeLimey wrote:I have another one but its too much to post here so if anyone wants to see my ultimate Jonny joke im me! Oh and Jonny... I love ya really!! |
| What are you, a prussy?...post it
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It is up to YOU to educate yourself and then help your doctor plan your treatment. If you just sit down in front of your doctor and say "make me better" you are setting yourself up for a great deal of pain.
- Guiseppi
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Ronny
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #11 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 4:13pm » |
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Happy anniversary King Jonny
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rextangle
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #12 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 4:24pm » |
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Happy Anniversary Jonny!!! Little Jonny comes home from school and his mom asks him: "What did you do today at school?" he replies... "Just the usual... oh! and I made love for the first time!" His mom can't believe what she just heard and shouts: "My God, Jonny, you're only 10 years old! Go to your room til your Dad comes home!!! NOW!!!" The father gets home. After his mom tells him what happened, he goes upstairs to talk to Jonny. And with a smile the father says: "Well Jonny, I was not as young as you when I first made love, but I knew it would happen to you one day, and here you are, almost all grown up! I'm proud of you, Jonny! So, anyway, how was it???" Little Jonny replies: "It was great daddy, but boy! does my ass hurt!!" LMAO and running for cover....
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aprilbee
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #13 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 4:27pm » |
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Happy Anny dear!!!
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LeLimey
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #14 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 4:38pm » |
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Little Jonny walks into school one day to find a substitute in place of his regular teacher. She says, "Hello class, I'm Mrs. Prussy. When you say my name class remember it has an "r" after the first letter." The entire class says, "Hello Mrs. Prussy." A few days later the regular teacher is still sick when Little Jonny gets to his desk the teacher asks what her name is. Jonny thinks hard and the says to the teacher, "I remember it has an "r" after the first letter." "That's right!" she coaxed. Then after a few seconds Little Jonny says, "Mrs. Crunt?"
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Jeepgun
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #15 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 4:40pm » |
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Not safe for work, or for households with young children about: http://media.putfile.com/great_job/320 Enjoy, King Jonny!
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?" Me: "What, like, in the FACE?" Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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broomhilda
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #16 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 4:56pm » |
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Happy Anniversary
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Suck it up Princess...
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Grandma_Sweet_Boy
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #17 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 5:11pm » |
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One of the first folks here to welcome me to this place and one I count as a friend. Happy Anniversary to THE KING! Carol
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vig
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #18 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 5:16pm » |
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a pat on the back to a brother in arms.... rock on bro!
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never, Never, NEVER quit. -Winston Churchill
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Chillrmn1
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #19 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 5:26pm » |
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Happy Anniversary..............you do good bro!
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jimmers
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #20 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 5:45pm » |
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Happy anniversary bro! I'll roast ya later Seeya, Jimmers
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Jonny
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #21 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 5:47pm » |
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on Oct 5th, 2005, 5:45pm, jimmers wrote:Happy anniversary bro! I'll roast ya later |
| Big Fag!!
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It is up to YOU to educate yourself and then help your doctor plan your treatment. If you just sit down in front of your doctor and say "make me better" you are setting yourself up for a great deal of pain.
- Guiseppi
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sassy_lady
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #22 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 6:14pm » |
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Happy Anniversary jonny
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Sean_C
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #23 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 7:11pm » |
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Congrats brudda Sean...........................
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unsolved1
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Re: Happy CH.com anniversary again, Jonny
« Reply #24 on: Oct 5th, 2005, 7:38pm » |
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Happy Anniversary King Jonny UNsolved
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