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Topic: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit! (Read 1366 times) |
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Jeepgun
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Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« on: Aug 10th, 2005, 10:27am » |
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In honor of the movie, "Pi"*
1. Affix proper drill diameter and length. 3/8" x 5" should be sufficient.
2. Set clutch to appropriate setting. The "drill" setting ensures that you won't run out of power at the critical moment, just before punching through the skull.
3. Set drill setting to "forward."
4. Use the trigger-lock to avoid releasing the trigger at critical moments, and also to avoid slippage due to spattering body fluids.
5. Rubber grip is also blood absorbent. An added plus!
6. 12V battery for extra power. Also available in 14 and 16V!
7. Battery casing is impact-resistant, for obvious reasons...
8. Easily depressed trigger makes for easier drilling, when trying to pressure through tough skull and epidural membranes!
9. Non-slip chuck ensures that maximum power is delivered to the surface being drilled!
*this is meant only as humor, boys and girls. Please do NOT try this at home!
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vig
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #1 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 10:30am » |
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long hair will probably get caught in the drill.
get your hair cut first.
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never, Never, NEVER quit. -Winston Churchill
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Jeepgun
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #2 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 10:32am » |
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Yes. Like this:
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Donna_D.
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #3 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 11:00am » |
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on Aug 10th, 2005, 10:27am, Frank_W wrote:
9. Non-slip Chuck ensures that maximum power is delivered to the surface being drilled!
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Sometimes the jokes just write themselves.....
DD
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Jeepgun
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #4 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 11:19am » |
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LMAO, Donna! 
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rextangle
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #5 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 2:04pm » |
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Hmm... just did it, but I think it may be a trigger for me 
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Kirk
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #6 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 2:11pm » |
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Has Ali heard about this one yet?
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Jeepgun
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #7 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 2:19pm » |
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I don't know. Think we can convince him to try it out on himself? LOL
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Jasmyn
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #8 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 2:24pm » |
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Frank it is critical to remember that most of your medication indicates that it is not advisable to operate heavy machinery or equipment! 
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Jazz 
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Jeepgun
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #9 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 2:38pm » |
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Gunning the trigger: "ZZZzzzzzzzz!! zzZZZZZzzzzz!!!"
*scary helter skelter grin*
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?"
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brainfreeze
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #10 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 2:40pm » |
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I've steered clear of guns and sharp objects but power drills are worth considering.
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Susan
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Jeepgun
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #12 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 2:52pm » |
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on Aug 10th, 2005, 2:48pm, floridian wrote:
ROFL!! I love that essay...
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clarence
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #13 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 3:52pm » |
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I found this abstract to a medical article when searching for self-trephination:
Quote:Self-trephination of the skull with an electric power drill.
Wadley JP, Smith GT, Shieff C.
Department of Neurosurgery, Royal Free Hospital, London, UK.
There is extensive archaeological evidence of the practice of trephination of the skull in many ancient cultures in different parts of the world. We report a case of self-trephination of the skull by a patient using an electrical power drill subsequently requiring neurosurgical intervention. |
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Please please please tell me that people don't really do this! Like the chick in the article, please tell me that was not real.
Casey
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floridian
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #14 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 4:32pm » |
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I don't know how much of the essay is real and how much might be realistic embellishment; I'm afraid to ask Michael, the guy who wrote it. I kinda think the ambiguity makes it better - makes one question and think. But there really are people that do that stuff - but not many. And is it really that far removed from body piercing??
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| « Last Edit: Aug 10th, 2005, 4:36pm by floridian » |
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Linda_Howell
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #15 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 5:30pm » |
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This might explain some of that article also:
Quote:| I met with her at a streetside coffee shop in downtown Toronto, Canada. |
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Canadian are a fierce breed. lmao
Linda
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Charlie
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #16 on: Aug 10th, 2005, 9:07pm » |
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OUCH
Charlie
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Jasmyn
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #17 on: Aug 11th, 2005, 12:29am » |
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Touchè Charlie
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Jazz
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burnt-toast
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #18 on: Aug 11th, 2005, 2:02am » |
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May be on to something here.
Take it along on your next neuro visit. When the neuro asks if its something you're considering say, yes - thought if I used it on you a couple of times you would get a better understand of my pain and get cracking on some better treatments.
Tom
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| « Last Edit: Aug 11th, 2005, 2:03am by burnt-toast » |
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Would the owner of the propane torch, egg beater, pipe expander and vise grips please claim these items. They're lodged in my head and I need the space.
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AussieBrian
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #19 on: Aug 11th, 2005, 2:34am » |
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Long before I knew it was CH, I was watching some documentary about an ancient civilization and one percent of the adults, mostly men, had holes drilled in thesides of their heads. "Of course, we don't know why."
All I could think was "I know. I know. They had what I've got!"
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Vulcrania horrendus - twice daily, then two at night in lieu of sleep.
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don
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #20 on: Aug 11th, 2005, 6:02am » |
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Wonder if my insurance will cover an extended warranty at Sears?
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Jeepgun
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Re: Auto-Trepanation DIY Kit!
« Reply #21 on: Aug 11th, 2005, 7:20am » |
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on Aug 11th, 2005, 2:34am, AussieBrian wrote:Long before I knew it was CH, I was watching some documentary about an ancient civilization and one percent of the adults, mostly men, had holes drilled in thesides of their heads. "Of course, we don't know why."
All I could think was "I know. I know. They had what I've got!" |
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OMG... I watched a similar documentary and thought the exact same thing, Brian! It would be funny if it weren't so damn painful.
"It only hurts when I don't laugh, Doc."
-Frank
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