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Topic: Who is your Daddy (Read 189 times) |
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rickyshot
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Who is your Daddy
« on: Aug 5th, 2005, 9:20am » |
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> The following are all replies that Florida women have
> written on Child Support Agency forms in the section
> for listing father's details. Or putting it another
> way.....
> Who's your Daddy! These are genuine excerpts from
> the forms. Be sure to check out Number 11..........
> it takes the prize and Number 3 is runner up.
>
>1. Regarding the identity of the father of my
> twins, child A was fathered by Jim Munson. I am unsure as
> to the identity of the father of child B, but I
> believe that he was conceived on the same night.
>
> 2. I am unsure as to the identity of the father
> of my child as I was being sick out of a window
> when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can
> provide you with a list of names of men that
> I think were at the party if this helps.
>
> 3. I do not know the name of the father of my
> little girl. She was conceived at a party at 3600
> Grand Avenue where I had unprotected sex with
> a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex
> was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to
> track down the father, can you send me his phone
> number? Thanks.
>
> 4. I don't know the identity of the father
> of my daughter. He drives a BMW that now has
> a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door
> panels. Perhaps you can contact BMW service
> stations in this area and see if he's had it
> replaced.
>
> 5. I have never had sex with a man. I am
> still a Virginian. I am awaiting a letter from the
> Pope confirming that my son's concept! ion was
> immaculate and that he is Christ risen again.
>
> 6. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad
> as he informs me that to do so would blow his
> cover and that would have cataclysmic implications
> for the economy. I am torn between doing right by
> you and right by the country. Please advise.
>
> 7. I do not know who the father of my child
> was as all blacks look the same to me.
>
> 8. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you
> do catch up with him, can you ask him what he
> did with my AC/DC CDs? Child B who was also
> borned at the same time.... well I don't have a
> clue.
>
> 9. From the dates it seems that my daughter
> was conceived at Disney World; maybe it really
> is the Magic Kingdom.
>
> 10. So much about that night is a blur. The
> only thing that I remember for sure is Delia Smith
> did a program about eggs earlier in the evening.
> If I'd have stayed in and watched more TV rather
> than going to the party at 146 Miller Drive, mine
> might have remained unfertilized.
>
> 11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father
> of my baby, after all when you eat a can of beans
> you can't be sure which one made you fart.
I think I have solved the problem
Jonny is the father of #2
Don is the father of #9
Frank is the father of #11
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Jeepgun
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BOHICA!!!
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #1 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 9:26am » |
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ROFLMAO!!
"BrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRRRRTT!!!"  
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?"
Me: "What, like, in the FACE?"
Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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rickyshot
New Board Hall of Famer
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #2 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 9:31am » |
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Keep laughing Frankie. BTW I figure you owe about 85,000.12 in back pay for child support by now......  
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ExplodingEyeBall
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #3 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 9:38am » |
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Whew!!!.....
Number 11 had me worried for a minute there.
Frank. Take responsibility for that child now.
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Just poke out my eye and get it over with!!!
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LeLimey
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #4 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 9:53am » |
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Sod that.. if any of you fathered #3 IM me please!!
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The arsehole I'm divorcing needs to get a life and stop stalking mine
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Jeepgun
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BOHICA!!!
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #5 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 9:54am » |
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/hiding out in a little beachside cabin somewhere on the island of Belize 
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?"
Me: "What, like, in the FACE?"
Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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Donna_D.
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #6 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 10:21am » |
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All goes to show....
Mama's baby, Daddy's maybe....
Funny stuff!
DD
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sandie99
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #7 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 10:23am » |
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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nani
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #8 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 10:25am » |
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OK...call me "old fashioned", but if these are true...I think it's kinda sad. 
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Others may come and go, but MY power is MINE.
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Jimi
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #9 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 10:30am » |
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Old fashion
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I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.
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Jeepgun
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #10 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 10:35am » |
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#2 just slays me... LMAO!!
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?"
Me: "What, like, in the FACE?"
Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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nani
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
Got kudzu?
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #11 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 10:36am » |
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Others may come and go, but MY power is MINE.
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Jeepgun
CH.com Alumnus
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BOHICA!!!
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #12 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 10:39am » |
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on Aug 5th, 2005, 9:53am, LeLimey wrote:| Sod that.. if any of you fathered #3 IM me please!! |
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ROFLMAO!! 
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?"
Me: "What, like, in the FACE?"
Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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thomas
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #13 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 10:45am » |
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on Aug 5th, 2005, 9:53am, LeLimey wrote:| Sod that.. if any of you fathered #3 IM me please!! |
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Sorry, I'm married now.
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Religion and sex are powerplays. Manipulate the people for the money they pay. Selling skin, selling God, the numbers look the same on their credit cards. Triptans cause rebounds. Learn it, believe it, live it. I use triptans as the absolute LAST RESORT when treating my CH.
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Jeepgun
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
BOHICA!!!
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Posts: 3840
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Re: Who is your Daddy
« Reply #14 on: Aug 5th, 2005, 10:56am » |
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#2 sounds like some really rough parties I've been to, back in the day. 'nuff said.
(and no, they weren't in Florida!)
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?"
Me: "What, like, in the FACE?"
Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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