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Topic: Old Men (Read 156 times) |
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Jimi
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I have owned a small farm for several years and have
a large pond in the back, fixed up nice; picnic tables,
horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees. The pond was properly, shaped and fixed up for swimming when it was built.
One evening I decided to go down to the pond, as I hadn't
been there for a while, and look it over.
I grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.
As I neared the pond, I heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.
As I came closer I saw it was a bunch of young women
skinny-dipping in my pond. I made the women aware of my presence and they all swam to the deep end.
One of the women shouted to me, "We're not coming out until you leave!"
I responded, "I didn't come down here to watch you women swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked.
Holding the bucket up I said, "I'm here to feed the alligator."
Moral: Old men can still think fast.
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I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.
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Gator
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Re: Old Men
« Reply #1 on: Jul 29th, 2005, 12:29pm » |
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LMAO Reminds me of one of my favorite old sayings:
Old age and treachery will overcome youth and skill.
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burnt-toast
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Re: Old Men
« Reply #2 on: Jul 29th, 2005, 1:21pm » |
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It's not how fast you move - it's how well you plot the course. 
Tom
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Would the owner of the propane torch, egg beater, pipe expander and vise grips please claim these items. They're lodged in my head and I need the space.
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marlinsfan
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Re: Old Men
« Reply #3 on: Jul 29th, 2005, 2:11pm » |
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I saw a t-shirt once of an old guy sitting on a stool, glasses on his nose, cane in his hand, hunched over. the shirt read something like:
In my life I have:
driven the fastest cars,
slept with the most beautiful women,
eaten at the best restaurants,
drank the best wines,
stayed at the best hotels,
I only wish I could remember it all!
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Jasmyn
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Each day will be a new trick in life's journey
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Re: Old Men
« Reply #4 on: Jul 29th, 2005, 2:36pm » |
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This is for certain: With age comes wisdom, wit, wrinkles, wind, walkers and wheelchairs!  
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Jazz 
Madness is proclaimed by society’s inability to accept its own infallibility
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nani
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Re: Old Men
« Reply #5 on: Jul 29th, 2005, 2:39pm » |
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on Jul 29th, 2005, 2:11pm, marlinsfan wrote:I saw a t-shirt once of an old guy sitting on a stool, glasses on his nose, cane in his hand, hunched over. the shirt read something like:
In my life I have:
driven the fastest cars,
slept with the most beautiful women,
eaten at the best restaurants,
drank the best wines,
stayed at the best hotels,
I only wish I could remember it all!
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Was that Jimi?
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Others may come and go, but MY power is MINE.
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toolong
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Re: Old Men
« Reply #6 on: Jul 29th, 2005, 3:06pm » |
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I was sitting in the nursing home with one of my old dear friends,Ralph.All of a sudden Ralph started shaking his hands in a rather excited and crazy motion.I said Ralpy old buddy what the hell is going on?His quick and short winded response was"first damn hard on I've had in 20 years and my hands fall asleep!!!"Moral of the story...get it while you can! David
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Hey,watch this!I saw it on a cartoon and I think it might work!
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