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Topic: I'm insane! (Read 300 times) |
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Jimi
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Who loves ya baby!
 
 
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I'm insane!
« on: Jul 14th, 2005, 11:32am » |
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20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point your
> >>> Hair
> >>> Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
> >>>
> >>> 2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
> >>>
> >>> 3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries
> >> with
> >>> That.
> >>>
> >>> 4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."
> >>>
> >>> 5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten
> >> Over
> >>> Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso.
> >>>
> >>> 6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling
Diamonds"
> >>>
> >>> 7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."
> >>>
> >>> 8. Don't use any punctuation
> >>>
> >>> 9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
> >>>
> >>> 10. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat with a serious face.
> >>>
> >>> 11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."
> >>>
> >>> 12. Sing Along At The Opera.
> >>>
> >>> 13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme
> >>>
> >>> 14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical
Sounds
> >> All
> >>> Day.
> >>>
> >>> 15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their
Party
> >>> Because You're Not In The Mood.
> >>>
> >>> 16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock
> >>> Bottom.
> >>>
> >>> 17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"
> >>>
> >>> 18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot,
Yelling
> >>> "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
> >>>
> >>> 19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
20. Go to Dallas and attend the Convention!
WE ARE ON THE WAY 
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I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.
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echo
CH.com Alumnus
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Chronic and still alive --- I Win!
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Re: I'm insane!
« Reply #1 on: Jul 14th, 2005, 11:35am » |
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Nice.
Have fun at the convention.
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"If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back, hunt it down and kill it".
Proud Dad of a US Marine, and a former Marine turned Police Officer.
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blood_Redd_son
New Board Veteran
ph33r w17h gr347 ph34r!
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Re: I'm insane!
« Reply #2 on: Jul 14th, 2005, 11:39am » |
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you're not insane untill you've found out you had 5 bottles of jolt, and have eaten 32 hersheys bars
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Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
~~T.S. Elliot
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Ghost
CH.com Alumnus
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Farting relieves the pressure
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Re: I'm insane!
« Reply #3 on: Jul 14th, 2005, 11:40am » |
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on Jul 14th, 2005, 11:32am, Jimi wrote:
> >>>
> >>> 7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."
> >>>
> >>> 9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
> >>>
> >>> 11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."
> >>>
> >>> 14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical
Sounds
> >> All Day.
> >>>
> >>> 15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their
Party Because You're Not In The Mood.
> >>>
> >>> 17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"
> >>>
> >>> 18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot,
Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
> >>>
20. Go to Dallas and attend the Convention!
WE ARE ON THE WAY |
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Dont forget whenever an announcment comes over the innercom at walmart to curl up on the floor and start crying to make the voices stop.
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Illigitimus Non Tatum Carborundum
If all men are endowed by their creator, why was mine so short sighted?
***WARNING*** Oxygen will rust your pipes!
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sandie99
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Wish it, dream it, do it - inspite the pain!
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Re: I'm insane!
« Reply #4 on: Jul 14th, 2005, 11:55am » |
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on Jul 14th, 2005, 11:39am, blood_Redd_son wrote:
Why 32....? 
I'm not a chocaholic, so I'd be insane if I did eat that many, that's for sure...
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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echo
CH.com Alumnus
New Board Hall of Famer
Chronic and still alive --- I Win!
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Posts: 4214
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Re: I'm insane!
« Reply #5 on: Jul 14th, 2005, 12:25pm » |
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#33. Open the door to a hair shop in the strip mall and yell.
EEE BEN EEEBEEN NORT NORT PSHTT
Look at your hand, grab your throat and say "damnit leave me alone", and walk away.
Come back in two minutes and ask if they're open on Tuesday.
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"If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back, hunt it down and kill it".
Proud Dad of a US Marine, and a former Marine turned Police Officer.
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aprilbee
CH.com Alumnus
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Ain't I a stinkah!!
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Re: I'm insane!
« Reply #6 on: Jul 14th, 2005, 1:47pm » |
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#34...turn and face everyone and sing along to the music in the elevator... (gives new meaning to the term a captive audience!! )
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purpleydog
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Posts: 2240
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Re: I'm insane!
« Reply #7 on: Jul 14th, 2005, 1:53pm » |
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Um, Jimi, yer not at the airport yet???
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sandie99
New Board Hall of Famer
Wish it, dream it, do it - inspite the pain!
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Re: I'm insane!
« Reply #8 on: Jul 14th, 2005, 2:00pm » |
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ok, I admit. it's enough to get the title insane if you take 2 anadin extras (HA meds with caffeine) and go to surprise a flatmate within seconds she has waken up by saying loudly: "Hello!"
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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don
Guest
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Hi and welcome.
Have you taken the insane quiz to the left ?
Also check out the McMurphy scale.
"When the waitress asks if you would like the check, with a straight face say "No thank you, I only take cash".
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| « Last Edit: Jul 14th, 2005, 3:16pm by don » |
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AussieBrian
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Got beer?
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Re: I'm insane!
« Reply #10 on: Jul 14th, 2005, 5:32pm » |
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#46 Look up the skirts of the supermarket mannequins.
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Vulcrania horrendus - twice daily, then two at night in lieu of sleep.
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Leesa
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Re: I'm insane!
« Reply #11 on: Jul 14th, 2005, 9:58pm » |
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Oh like we didnt know this already  Geesshhhhh I mean that you Jimi are INSANE in a BIIIIIG way.
Those who know you KNOW your insane dear. 
Leesa
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"The truth of the matter is that you always know the right thing to do. The hard part is doing it." General H. Norman Schwarzkopf 
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cootie
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sumday I'm gonna be sumbody........ ..
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Re: I'm insane!
« Reply #12 on: Jul 14th, 2005, 10:17pm » |
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Set off the dam Walmart 'alarm' at the door "again" and scream FUCK as loud as you can with people stareing like yer nuts. I did that not long ago......Still crazy after all those fears Pam
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Cause and Effect......"Cause is the effect concealed, Effect is the cause revealed"
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