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Topic: Women's Personal Ad Translations (Read 257 times) |
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notseinfeld
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Women's Personal Ad Translations
« on: May 25th, 2005, 11:25am » |
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40-ish.............................................49
Adventurous.......................very *friendly* person
Athletic......................................No tits
Average looking..................................Ugly
Beautiful...........................Pathological liar
Contagious Smile..................Does a lot of pills
Emotionally Secure......................On antidepressants
Free spirit....................................Junkie
Friendship first..........................Former very *friendly* person
Fun..........................................Annoying
New-Age.................Body hair in the wrong places
Old-fashioned................................No blowjobs
Open-minded.................................Desperate
Outgoing........................Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate...............................Sloppy drunk
Professional....................................Bitch
Feminist..........................................Fat
Voluptuous...................................Very Fat
Large frame................................Hugely Fat
Wants Soulmate................................Stalker
WOMEN'S ENGLISH
. Yes = No
. No = Yes
. Maybe = No
. We need = I want..
. I am sorry = you'll be sorry
. We need to talk = You're in trouble
. Sure, go ahead = You better not
. Do what you want = You will pay for this later
. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, not a very nice person.
. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?
MEN'S ENGLISH
. I am hungry = I am hungry
. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
. I am tired = I am tired
. Nice dress = Nice tits
. I love you = I’m horny
. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you
. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you
. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you
. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you
. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay
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-----------Democracy is three wolves and a sheep voting on what's for dinner. ---------------------
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Candycane
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Re: Women's Personal Ad Translations
« Reply #1 on: May 25th, 2005, 11:29am » |
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Thanks now I will sure be careful when ANY male ask me to go to the movies!!! 
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giffy76
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Posts: 724
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Re: Women's Personal Ad Translations
« Reply #2 on: May 25th, 2005, 11:33am » |
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You don't have to be any more careful than before, if you ever went on a date that's what he's thinkin. So I guess that means you won't go to dinner with me. lol
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Candycane
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Re: Women's Personal Ad Translations
« Reply #3 on: May 25th, 2005, 11:42am » |
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on May 25th, 2005, 11:33am, giffy76 wrote:| You don't have to be any more careful than before, if you ever went on a date that's what he's thinkin. So I guess that means you won't go to dinner with me. lol |
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No, and you can't call me either! 
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giffy76
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Re: Women's Personal Ad Translations
« Reply #4 on: May 25th, 2005, 11:56am » |
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So you actually mean yes. pick ya up at 8:00
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Langa
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Re: Women's Personal Ad Translations
« Reply #5 on: May 25th, 2005, 1:35pm » |
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In my most humble opinion, only the Men's info is correct.
Langa
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Ghost
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Re: Women's Personal Ad Translations
« Reply #6 on: May 25th, 2005, 2:00pm » |
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I have to agree but the womens info could never be correct because they are always changing their minds.   
Lets get ready to rumble!!!
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Illigitimus Non Tatum Carborundum
If all men are endowed by their creator, why was mine so short sighted?
***WARNING*** Oxygen will rust your pipes!
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BarbaraD
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Hugs to ya
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Re: Women's Personal Ad Translations
« Reply #7 on: May 25th, 2005, 2:03pm » |
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Oh heck - someone figured it out -- Now we have to CHANGE all the rules AGAIN!!!
Hugs BD
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Jeepgun
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BOHICA!!!
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Re: Women's Personal Ad Translations
« Reply #8 on: May 25th, 2005, 2:56pm » |
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*gasp!* Change the rules AGAIN?? NOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooo!!!! 
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?"
Me: "What, like, in the FACE?"
Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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rickyshot
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ouch
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Re: Women's Personal Ad Translations
« Reply #9 on: May 25th, 2005, 3:12pm » |
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Yup Just when you have all the answers , they change the questions.
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LeLimey
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Re: Women's Personal Ad Translations
« Reply #10 on: May 25th, 2005, 3:14pm » |
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on May 25th, 2005, 2:56pm, Frank_W wrote:| *gasp!* Change the rules AGAIN?? NOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooo!!!! |
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Nope Frank. I can assure you wholeheartedly I am consistant.
I will ALWAYS think you are a wassock!
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The arsehole I'm divorcing needs to get a life and stop stalking mine
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Jeepgun
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BOHICA!!!
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Re: Women's Personal Ad Translations
« Reply #11 on: May 25th, 2005, 3:18pm » |
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Thanks.... My wassocks are on my wafeets and in my waboots.
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Her: "Have you ever hit a deer?"
Me: "What, like, in the FACE?"
Her: ..... "WHAT is the MATTER with you!?"
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Gator
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Re: Women's Personal Ad Translations
« Reply #12 on: May 26th, 2005, 4:51pm » |
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on May 25th, 2005, 2:03pm, BarbaraD wrote:| Now we have to CHANGE all the rules AGAIN!!! |
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 Like THIS wasn't gonna happen anyways???
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