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Topic: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad (Read 350 times) |
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PrettyH8Machine
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I am on day 8 of no CH! This is the longest break I have had in a VERY long time. Not sure how long this will last, but making the most of every moment. I am also very sore, as I started working out again to try and undo some of the damage of all the meds.
At the same time, I feel bad knowing so many peeps here are hurting and going through hell. That weighs heavy on my heart. All I can do is hope, pray and offer support. You guys have all been here for me over the years, and even if I stay PF, I ain't going anywhere. Just remember, there is always hope that this will end once and for all.
Peace & Love,
Carl
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sandie99
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #1 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 1:32pm » |
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Carl,
I'm so glad that you're still PF!  I hope that your head stays that way. Enjoy every moment! You've deserved it.
PFDAN,
Sandie
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CH happends, Live anyway! PF days to us all!
"Do what you can and let God take care of the rest. Leave your heart wide open and always wish for the best" (Sanna Hillu)
"No matter how far out your dreams are, it's possible" (Marketa Irglova)
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ExplodingEyeBall
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #2 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 1:36pm » |
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Carl,
There's no reason to feel bad about beeing PF. I'm sure that every one here is happy for you. I know I am. 
Now, it's time to pick up that guitar and warm it up. 
Pat
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Just poke out my eye and get it over with!!!
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rickyshot
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #3 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 1:48pm » |
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yes , yes YESSSS. No ricky is not having the big O. She is happy for you.  I am episodic so I get many PF days if you do not count the migraines. Change of season is coming. Oh Hell.......
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Melissa
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #4 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 1:56pm » |
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Ahem. Since I am one of the best for feeling guilty because I'm PF, let me say that you better NOT be feeling that way!!! I got over it, and so should you! Be HAPPY, because that's what everyone would want you to be! Ok?
 mel
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cat14
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #5 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 2:28pm » |
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Just enjoy and don't worry about us!! Its your turn!!!
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ZAIRA
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #6 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 3:34pm » |
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What did you take, my friend?? 
I think you are a real fighter, like all CHs and I am happy to hear you're still PF....
Hope things are getting better for you every day!!!
Ciao, Zazi
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..Danielle..
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #7 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 3:43pm » |
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Keep praying for those others in pain, as others will for you when your in pain. In the same breath, I hope yours doesn't return for at least 60-70 years
Enjoy it, savour it and show the beast you can LIVE !
Danielle
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Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow. -Helen Keller
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nani
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #8 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 3:45pm » |
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NEVER. EVER, feel guilty about PF times. It's encouraging to all of us to see someone get relief!
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LeLimey
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #9 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 3:56pm » |
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Ditto Carl!
It does me good to see someone posting that they are pain free... its a really nice reminder that it WILL happen for all of us and lets face it.. you've done your time! I couldn't be happier you are pain free and long may it last! 
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E-Double
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #10 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 5:30pm » |
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Don't you dare feel bad brother!!!!
Know right to! Enjoy what you have and just let it shine!
That makes us feel better ...atleast me
Be well bro and keep living!
Eric
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I can't believe that I have to bang my
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Gonna take a breath and try again.
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Linda_Howell
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #11 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 5:32pm » |
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Don't you dare feel guilty Carl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!or I'll kick your ass. 
Besides a few others here who are chronic, I can't think of a more deserving person to be PF right now.
Enjoy it...start writing/playing/ whatever floats yer boat.
Linda
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Donna_D.
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #12 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 6:09pm » |
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PF!!!!!
Shout it from the rooftops, Carl!!
Do NOT feel guilty!!
Hoping there are many more PF days in your future!!
DD
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Jackie
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #13 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 6:20pm » |
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Carl.....
Enjoy every single minute of it....
Post about it, please. I remember when Blake was in the darkest days and someone would post about PF time....it would give him hope along with a good feeling that another CHer was getting relief. We all love to hear success stories.....
Jacks 
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dagger
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #14 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 6:32pm » |
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Good for you! I meant to make a new thread for my own pf celebration, but couldn't get the computer to cooperate that night. So I emailed Helen. But I have been out of cycle for about 3 weeks now and couldn't be happier! I continue to visit the board, tho, and hope that everybody else becomes pf, too. Especially you chronics - I don't know how you do it!! Thanks and love to all... dagger
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Charlie
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #15 on: Feb 9th, 2005, 11:13pm » |
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Enjoy every friggin minute. You've more than earned a break.
Charlie
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Mr. Happy
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #16 on: Feb 10th, 2005, 1:00am » |
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Feel guilty all you want, Carl. (Funny, he doesn't look Jewish.)
Maybe you ought to tell us again how you got to this PF state after eons of incessant whining. Someone may have missed the point.
I just love a good story, don't you?
RJ
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Tara Ann
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #17 on: Feb 10th, 2005, 1:02am » |
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Gives hope when someone becomes PF. Glad you are enjoying every moment!
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K-9
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #18 on: Feb 10th, 2005, 2:07am » |
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If it was permission from the family you needed, I think you got it!!!! Enjoy it, and may it be long lasting!!!
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rextangle
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #19 on: Feb 10th, 2005, 3:49pm » |
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Carl, you don't have to feel guilty about anything....
Be the FUN GUY (fungi) that you can be!
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Tiannia
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #20 on: Feb 10th, 2005, 4:22pm » |
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Carl - there is no reason for you to feel bad. Each one of us is hoping that someone is PF. We are all so happy for you. And you better stick around or jonny will hunt you down.
Honestly hun. I am so happy that you are PF and I hope that it is not just a break. May the beast never darken your doorstep again.
/hugs
PF Wishes for all time
-Tia
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The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change. - Carl Rogers
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PrettyH8Machine
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #21 on: Feb 10th, 2005, 6:53pm » |
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Thanks guys & gals. I guess Purpley is right in that, I've been in constant pain with the CH, Fibro & everything that now I don't know how to act. Getting sleep again is making me feel like a million bucks, and I have my sharp wits about me again. Slowly but surely, I am becoming me again. Damn, it has been so long I forgot who I was.
This is day 9 of no hits, and the tenderness in the temple has eased a bit too. Though the back of my head still aches - I can deal with that no sweat.
As for your question Happy of what I used to achieve this: I watched the Wizard of Oz with the sound down while listening to Pink Floyd - Dark Side Of The Moon. I think that confused the beast, he decided I was weird, so he left.
Actually, I tried the alternative treatment of Psilocybin. This is my third time trying. I did it once in 2000 with little result. I did two doses in 2001 which knocked me from a few hits a day down to a few a week - which was better, but I was still getting hit. This time I did 3 seperate doses of the fungus 5 days apart each. Even though I was skeptical at first, after the 2nd dose I had a couple of minor attacks before this stretch of CH-free days. The Clusterbusters method is making a tea out of the shrooms and drinking that - which produces a mild euphoric/giddy effect. However, when I was much younger, we use to do acid(LSD) and Shrooms recreationally. I swore off the stuff back in 1996 after one too many 'bad trips.' Ironically enough, a year or more later I got hit with another cycle and then in February of 1998, I became chronic. I didn't know why they weren't going away after a year or more, and then a friend found this site for me and that was when I learned what chronic and episodic meant. I was episodic from 1987-1997 then became chronic in '98.
Being chronic, I decided to fully dose the shrooms instead of doing the tea. I don't recommend this for everyone. My reasoning though is, even if I have a bad trip - I can handle it. ANYTHING is better than having to do battle with the beast daily. Can I get a big AMEN to that?
I remember someone said that Psilocybin doesn't work for chronics. Only time will tell. All I can say is, so far - soooooo fucken goooooooood!
CD
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vig
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #22 on: Feb 10th, 2005, 7:17pm » |
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on Feb 10th, 2005, 6:53pm, PrettyH8Machine wrote:Can I get a big AMEN to that?
I remember someone said that Psilocybin doesn't work for chronics. Only time will tell. All I can say is, so far - soooooo fucken goooooooood!
CD
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CD
I'm tickled pink for ya.
Keep it up and live BIG!!!
also, it's not true that it doesn't work for CHronics...
I WAS, now I'm not. It might be harder to stop for CHronics, but it's still quite stoppable.
Maybe with some more researCH we'll get to the bottom of this for everybody.
Now get out there and enjoy life!
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never, Never, NEVER quit. -Winston Churchill
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PrettyH8Machine
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #23 on: Feb 10th, 2005, 7:44pm » |
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on Feb 10th, 2005, 7:17pm, vig wrote:
Now get out there and enjoy life! |
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HELL YES!
Been making the most of every day I am free of the beast. With all the rest I am getting, I feel good. Everyone who sees me says I look better than I have in ages, and my cool nurse today said she has never seen me beam and glow like this before. I joked with her and said "I hope that doesn't mean I'm pregnant."
Been working on music with others, and even did a drum track the other day for my old guitarist in exchange for a piece of gear I desperately needed to start my next disc. Also learning my mixed drinks as I hope to go back to work very soon bartending. I'll be doing that on nights the band isn't gigging.
I haven't been able to work out in a very long time either. It kills my head to even try. As a result of that, the meds and such - I have gotten FAT! So I started working out again Monday and hope to shed some of this extra flesh and get back in good shape again. The Fibromyalgia weakened me, so I am fighting it back now.
CD
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rextangle
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Re: I Feel Good...But I Feel Bad
« Reply #24 on: Feb 10th, 2005, 10:57pm » |
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Stay PF!!!! May the fungi be with you 
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