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Topic: A song for Jonny, from my heart. (Read 474 times) |
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Jayne
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A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« on: Sep 18th, 2004, 7:25pm » |
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Sung to the tune of Gloria Gaynor's "I will survive"
>
> I WILL SURVIVE!
>
> At first I was afraid,
> I was petrified,
> When you said you had 10 inches
> Lord, I almost died.
> But I'd spent so many nights
> just waiting for a man that long,
> That I grew strong,
> And I knew that I could take you on. . .
>
> But there you are,
> Another lie!
> I was ready for a Big Mac
> and you've brought me a French fry.
> I should have known it was so small,
> Just a sad pathetic dream,
> Should have known there was no Anaconda
> lurking in those jeans.
>
> Go on now go,
> Walk out the door,
> Don't you promise me 10 inches
> then turn up with only 4,
> Weren't you a jerk to think I wouldn't notice it pop out,
> Don't you know we're only joking
> when we say size doesn't count?
>
> I will survive,
> I will survive,
> Cuz as long as I have batteries,
> My sex life's gonna thrive,
> I will always have good sex
> with a handful of latex.
> I will survive,
> I will survive. . .hey, hey!
>
> It took all my self control
> not to laugh out loud,
> When I saw your little wiener
> standing small and proud.
> But too bad about your ego
> and to Hell with all your needs!
> Now I'm saving all my lovin'
> for a cordless multispeed
>
> Go on now go,
> Just make a dash,
> Last time I saw a dick that small I was treating diaper rash!
> I should have asked for confirmation,
> Should have asked for pictures, please!
> Then I wouldn't have you waving that
> wee winkie thing at me.
>
> Go on now go,
> Just hit the track,
> Don't you bring me home no little worm,
> I'll always throw them back.
> The only thing that I could do with a dick as small as yours,
> Is to stick it with a tooth pick
> And then call it an hors d'oeuvre!
>
> I will survive,
> I will survive,
> Cuz as long as I have batteries,
> My sex life's gonna thrive,
> I will always have good sex
> with a handful of latex.
> I will survive,
> I will survive. . .hey, hey!
>
> Go on now go,
> Get out of my sight,
> I'm going back to my appliance,
> Cuz I know it's length is right,
> And if I ever see your tiny pecker peckin' at my door,
> You'll be counting your 4 inches
> as you pick them off the floor.
>
>
GO ON NOW GO!
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alleyoop
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #1 on: Sep 18th, 2004, 7:31pm » |
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ROTFLMFAO!!!!! 
Let the games begin................
.......................................alley 
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I know that the Good Lord won't put any more on you than you can stand, but sometimes I wish He weren't quite so PROUD of ME!
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nani
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #2 on: Sep 18th, 2004, 7:48pm » |
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LMAO!!!
verrry funnny!
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KingOfPain
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #3 on: Sep 18th, 2004, 7:48pm » |
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Tag!
[your it, Jonny]
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Arrived August, 1999.
We swallow greedily any lie that flatters us, but we sip only little by little at a truth we find bitter.
- Denis Diderot
Real friendship is shown in times of trouble; prosperity is full of friends. - Euripides
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psycofemale0403
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MAKE IT STOP!!!!!
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #4 on: Sep 18th, 2004, 7:58pm » |
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AWWWW, poor LITTLE Jonny.
That was great.
~ Lisa
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Sean_C
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #5 on: Sep 18th, 2004, 8:04pm » |
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I'll assume she's gettin full veiw of the mule by now 
Too funny Jayne
Sean..................
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Kris_in_SJ
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #6 on: Sep 18th, 2004, 8:14pm » |
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LMFAO!!!!
Let's get a copywrite!
Kris
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Jonny
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #7 on: Sep 19th, 2004, 12:26am » |
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Heres your Big Mac, Bitch!!
And that aint no damn sock......LMAO
..................Hung like Mule
Edit:....To show she wants me
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| « Last Edit: Sep 19th, 2004, 1:18am by jonny » |
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lisaa
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #8 on: Sep 19th, 2004, 7:26am » |
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| « Last Edit: Sep 19th, 2004, 1:24pm by lisaa » |
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Jimmy_B.
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #9 on: Sep 19th, 2004, 7:51am » |
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on Sep 19th, 2004, 7:26am, lisaa wrote:| I think even ZOO dont accept you.......... |
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 Shot across the bow. Looking for the explosion.
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Jonny
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #10 on: Sep 19th, 2004, 8:05am » |
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on Sep 19th, 2004, 7:26am, lisaa wrote:| I think even ZOO dont accept you.......... |
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And you sir are a towelheaded sandn-igga, back to Iraq with you olive skinned ass before I cover you in pigs blood and fuck you in the ass while I take pictures for that pig you call a wife (How am I doing Jimmy)
.....................................Zoo keeper
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| « Last Edit: Sep 19th, 2004, 8:06am by jonny » |
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Jimmy_B.
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #11 on: Sep 19th, 2004, 8:47am » |
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on Sep 19th, 2004, 8:05am, Jonny wrote:
And you sir are a towelheaded sandn-igga, back to Iraq with you olive skinned ass before I cover you in pigs blood and fuck you in the ass while I take pictures for that pig you call a wife (How am I doing Jimmy)
.....................................Zoo keeper
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No one could've said it better. Go get em!
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"I'd much rather be HAPPY then RIGHT any day" Slartibartfast
Get informed! Don't vote a party ticket. Go to www.vote-smart.org and find out where your political candidates stand.
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Jayne
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #12 on: Sep 19th, 2004, 10:37am » |
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on Sep 19th, 2004, 7:26am, lisaa wrote:| I think even ZOO dont accept you.......... |
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Look "Bilabila" this was supposed to be a cute thread to make jonny laugh.
Why don't you take your right hand...(that's the one you wipe your arse with isn't it) ..use it for something usefull and point your way out the door.
Good bye Goonigoogoo.
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Ree
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #13 on: Sep 19th, 2004, 11:59am » |
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that was the funniest thing WE have ever read... thanks for the laugh we had a rough morning going to the airport takin Scott so he could go back to the sand pit Hell hole... Jayne you are a riot........hehehe
oooooooooo I'm not laughing at you jonny... I've seen the pics.........ree
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Proud Mom to US ARMY Kiowa OH58 PILOT~CWO2 SCOTT Hawaii, & USMC Vet~Now POLICE OFFICER SEAN, Citizen of the Month~ Breezy~ Nana 4 Matt/Mike&Aya, MIL To Shino Wife to Dave HI BILL!http://www.myspace.com/dungareespocket http://www.prohawaiian.com
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Jonny
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #14 on: Sep 20th, 2004, 3:53pm » |
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on Sep 19th, 2004, 11:59am, Ree wrote:| oooooooooo I'm not laughing at you jonny... I've seen the pics.........ree |
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You damn right your not.....Its no laughing matter if you have to endure it.....LMMFAO
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echo
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Re: A song for Jonny, from my heart.
« Reply #15 on: Sep 20th, 2004, 4:00pm » |
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That was hilarious. Thanks for the laugh. I really needed one today.
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"If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back, hunt it down and kill it".
Proud Dad of a US Marine, and a former Marine turned Police Officer.
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