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Topic: AAA.... R...... GH! (Read 836 times) |
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ZAIRA
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AAA.... R...... GH!
« on: Sep 13th, 2004, 2:57pm » |
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..... BAD DAY TODAY.... GRRRRrrrrrr..... I was to the neurologist, he is (was) not only a doctor, but also a friend. Today after the examination (I usually see him every month) he said me that he had to say me an important thing: That he loves me and he wants to leave her wife for me...
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No comment------ I hate men like him, respect for the other people first. And I am sorry for his wife because I think she doesn’t deserve a man like him.....
He knows me since when I started suffer of CH... I shared with him the first shot of trex... and he shocked me... because I trusted him, and he knows my husband also   .... and now he makes me sick .... ok, I can understand that a man can have a crush for a woman, even if he is married.... but not in this way. This means that he doesn’t love his wife .... or maybe he is really a pig! 
Maybe I had to be more careful also in the past because of his attentions to me...... I repeat, I considered him as a friend.....
What do you advice for me? 
I think the right thing to do is to change neurologist... I do not know what to say! 
Sorry! 
BTW..... I am at home, I can’t still walk because my knees hurt... but it will pass...
PFDAN, Zaira
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| « Last Edit: Sep 13th, 2004, 2:58pm by ZAIRA » |
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Melissa
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Zazi,
I would tell him straight out never to talk that way to you again, or else you will see a different neuro, or report his advances to his superiors. (do you all have a law against sexual harrassment?)
You shouldn't have to give up quality care due to your providers shortcomings.
mel
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Ronny
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #2 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 3:04pm » |
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on Sep 13th, 2004, 2:57pm, ZAIRA wrote: or maybe he is really a pig!
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He is a pig !!! no doubt about that.
Glad you're at home.
Ronny.
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Jeepgun
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Zazi, I am so sorry... How unprofessional of him. If he's a good doctor, I would continue to keep him as a doctor, especially now that you've told him that you are not interested in him romantically. As for telling your husband or telling his wife, I wouldn't say anything. Even though he's a doctor, he is only human and we all make mistakes sometimes. I'm sure he is embarrassed. If he continues behaving in an unprofessional manner, then you should tell your husband and also seek out a different doctor.
-Frank
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thomas
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Get a new doctor ASAP!
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vig
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #5 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 3:10pm » |
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I am so sorry Z.
I agree with Thomas though.
He has irreversibly compromised his ability to be a good doctor for you.
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The mad viking
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #6 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 3:10pm » |
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on Sep 13th, 2004, 3:07pm, thomas wrote:
Think i follow Thomas here
Dont feel he can be trusted 100%
Svenn
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totka
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #7 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 3:13pm » |
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Try a 80+ years old neuro ...
or try a pansy neuro ...
or try a female neuro ...
but necessarily change this unethical one
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TomM
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #8 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 3:15pm » |
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on Sep 13th, 2004, 3:07pm, thomas wrote:
Find a new doc. Your relationship will never be the same no matter what.
TomM
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Melissa
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on Sep 13th, 2004, 3:05pm, Jeepgun wrote:| especially now that you've told him that you are not interested in him romantically. |
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I don't think Zazi has said anything to him Frank. The pickle she is in, is one that can leave you tounge tied sometimes... 
Zazi, you have to do what makes you feel most comfortable. I hope, if you find a new doc, that they work with you, and listen to you, to help treat your CH's.
love,
mel
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pubgirl
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Zazi
I don't want to make a joke of this as I know how horrible this feels, but frankly this man should be avoided. At minimum he isn't concentrating on treating you properly, and at maximum you could be at risk.
I would speak to him one more time but clearly tell him that his unethical behaviour requires that you change doctors and that you want him to refer you to THE BEST THERE IS and that he must make sure you are taken on by them as a patient immediately. Tell him that this is what you require at once or you will be taking his conduct further.
Wendy
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| « Last Edit: Sep 13th, 2004, 3:21pm by pubgirl » |
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echo
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #11 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 3:21pm » |
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You may get better medicial attention from him because he does care for you.
I believe you need to tell him where you stand on this issue. He needs to honor what you say and NEVER cross the line again. If he does - take him off at the knees!
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"If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back, hunt it down and kill it".
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floridian
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He stepped over the line. He violated his duty to be a professional. Time for a new doctor.
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echo
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #13 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 3:23pm » |
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on Sep 13th, 2004, 3:20pm, pubgirl wrote:Zazi
....
I would speak to him one more time but clearly tell him that his unethical behaviour requires that you change doctors and that you want him to refer you to THE BEST THERE IS and that he must make sure you are taken on by them as a patient immediately. Tell him that this is what you require at once or you will be taking his conduct further.
Wendy |
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I like Wendy's approach.
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"If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back, hunt it down and kill it".
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Melissa
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By the way Zazi, where is this mans practice?
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lionsound
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #15 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 3:35pm » |
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Zazi,
WHAT A SCHMUCK! (ass-hole is too kind).
I'm so sorry that happened to you. Nothing you have done has caused his behavior. He threw himself over the line.
Get a new doctor, and until then, bring your husband with you if you must go back.
-L
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Carl_D
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Rule #1 for being a doctor - You CANNOT have a romance with a patient.
I know it is hard to find good Doc's these days, but I would definitely find a new doc and until you do, if you continue to see this neuro - always have someone with you on your appointments. It will be harder for him to make advances with a third party there.
Hope those knees feel better soon.
Peace and hugs,
Carl
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ZAIRA
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #17 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 3:49pm » |
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I am sorry but I can't speak or see him again and I don’t want to tell anything to his wife.... 
Thank you for your words.... First: I had to speak with my husband...... why? He was waiting for me outside 'the door' (I let you imagine), and he asked me “what is happened?” because I was really shocked... why?
Because he also touched me with her dirty hands...
Second: I do not want to make a legal cause, even if he is a fucking bastard (and I trusted him ).... he has been a very good doctor and friend. I could make it, my mom works with case like this... Maybe if I tell her she can do somenthing, BUT,even if he was really a pig, I don’t want to ruin his carrer.
I could, but I don’t want... he must stay away.... that is all....
Sorry !
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| « Last Edit: Sep 13th, 2004, 3:50pm by ZAIRA » |
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Melissa
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on Sep 13th, 2004, 3:49pm, ZAIRA wrote:
Second: I do not want to make a legal cause, even if he is a fucking bastard (and I trusted him ).... he has been a very good doctor and friend. I could make it, my mom works with case like this... Maybe if I tell her she can do somenthing, BUT,even if he was really a pig, I don’t want to ruin his carrer.
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Ok Zazi, I can understand that. I was just wondering if this was an isolated incident, or perhaps he has done this to other patients? The only reason why I suggested legal prosecution, is to prevent this man from harrassing others.
Sorry to hear of all this...
 mel
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ZAIRA
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #19 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 4:12pm » |
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on Sep 13th, 2004, 4:03pm, Melissa wrote:
Ok Zazi, I can understand that. I was just wondering if this was an isolated incident, or perhaps he has done this to other patients?
mel |
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I don't know Mel... I spoke with mum and she told me he never had 'legal proceedings' for that. Can you understand? This means that he never molested a woman.....
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Grandma_Sweet_Boy
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #20 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 5:00pm » |
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OR - perhaps a woman has been afraid to report him. We sometimes put doctors on a pedestal that they truly don't belong on.
I agree with the others about finding a new doctor and frankly I'd report the S.O.B. in a heartbeat. You may save some other woman from the same problems.
Good luck to you - lord knows you've had enough of the other kind.
Hugs - Carol
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TomM
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #21 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 5:02pm » |
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on Sep 13th, 2004, 3:49pm, ZAIRA wrote:
Because he also touched me with her dirty hands...
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Zazi--
Did he touch your chest or legs or between? If so, do yourself and everyone a favor and press charges.
If he hugged you a little too tight and carressed you, then forget it. What he did is not right but there is no point to pressing charges for that.
No matter what, I suggest you find a new doc.
I'm sorry you have to deal with this. Remember this: YOU did nothing wrong! You did NOTHING wrong! Can you hear me?
Wishing you well.
TomM
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| « Last Edit: Sep 13th, 2004, 5:03pm by TomM » |
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Cathi04
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #22 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 7:40pm » |
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Zazi..this is horrid, luv.. PLEASE let Mum 1 take care of this..he must be confronted, as this IS horribly unprofessional behavior...
Zazi, luv..SOME men are pigs, not all............bar this in mind..
Now, continue to heal your knees.......and let us know how you are getting on, OK?
Love,
Mum2
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Karla
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #23 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 7:54pm » |
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Zaira if you value your marriage at all, run! Don't walk but run as fast as you can away from this pig! He can not be trusted. If he would cheat on his wife he will cheat on you. He obviously doesn't value his friendship with you or your husband. He is not a friend. Find a new dr/neuro As soon as possible!
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Karla
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cootie
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Re: AAA.... R...... GH!
« Reply #24 on: Sep 13th, 2004, 9:09pm » |
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First thing I'd wonder is if he has said this to other women also.......has he also been there close 'friend' then told them how he felt bluntly.....I'd be concern'd of his motive. How many times has he been married.....wonder if he got his wife this way too ? Even if he did fall for you he handled it wrong. Woudln't want a guy that was capable of the love em and leave em game. I'd sever my ties from this guy for your sake and his......and wonder if it will happen again to someone else......I'd never trust him again or want to be around him esp if he thought bein around you was gettin somewhere.....scarey !!!! Did he keep rescheduleing you appointments alot. And to think of what thoughts were goin thru his head when he was examineing you.....ICK.......creeps me out Pam
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