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Carl_D
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I usually don't ask for this but...
« on: Aug 19th, 2004, 3:46am » |
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I sure could use some vibes right now. Everything seems to be wrong right now. The med they gave me at the ER, Ativan is helping me, but when I go to my GP next month, he won't be able to prescribe it to me if it is listed as a narcotic. He is unable to prescribe anything listed as a narcotic due to a dumb-ass psychiatrist who basically called me a drug addict and my doctor my drug dealer. Didn't care what I have wrong with me physically, and he even called me an alcoholic - even though I rarely drink anymore... I could go on and on...
He sent my Doc a threatening letter that if he prescribes any narcotic to me that he will lose his license. I just wish there was some way I could make him suffer for his actions! When I asked him what country he was from he said Saudi Arabia. I asked if everyone from Saudi was a terrorist. He of course said no. I said "not all of us who come through here are drug addicts either!" I am just blown away by how much power and authority this man had over me, after not even knowing me for less than 2 minutes. Didn't even want to hear about my medical history, etc. So the only painkiller I can get from my GP is Tramadol -which is nasty stuff and losing its effectiveness. I feel like a trapped animal, and I think he saw that in my face last week, and that is why he demanded I get into a neuro soon!
Sorry to rant about this here, but right now I am in SEVERE pain that will not let me sleep. My legs throb, ache and burn with pain. I am shadowing very hard, but that doesn't match the pain in my legs (haven't been 'hit' since 2am Wednesday morning). but I'm expecting a doozy of a CH when I crash. At least the Ativan has knocked out the panic attacks and I'm a bit calmer, I'm just using them very sparingly in case it is in the category of stuff my Doc can't prescribe.
HOW CAN A SHRINK GET AWAY WITH MAKING AN ASSESSMENT OF SOMEONE AFTER ONLY SPEAKING TO THEM FOR :45 SECONDS? AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO THINKS THERE'S SOMETHING PRETTY FUCKED UP ABOUT THIS?
Anyway, I'm just venting a bit since I have no one to talk to right now, and I don't have a phone to call anyone. I can't sleep (the Seroquel didn't kick my ass like it did everyone else, barely fazed me.) I'm tired, in pain, getting alot of muscle spasms, shadowing hard, had some confusion as to what day it is (my watch went dead and now I am lost in time)I have been feeling very weak all day and night, sweating alot, and no appetite. Was so weak today I couldn't even walk to my brothers house. Very dizzy and light-headed too.
I'm still bumming over the loss of my acoustic guitar, but hoping I can get one or at least borrow one for DavCon '05. I bummed that I didn't get to jam for you guys in Nashville, but I guess it wasn't meant to be for that event. Right now I am even more bummed at my TV going out. The guys at Alpha electronics said all they could do with it is junk it. It wasn't worth anything to them. So now I am trying to find a way to get another TV, because being on a fixed income - I don't have money for anything anymore. They even stopped paying the co-pay to my doc's office, and I didn't know anything about it until they handed me a bill for $280 bucks. They were nice about it though and just requested I bring in 10 dollars or more a month.
The only good thing to report about as of late is, a fellow CH'er sprung my Marshall amp out of pawn for me, so I am once again able to jam out at home when I feel the need to de-stress. I missed it so much that, the day I got it home, I played for over 4 hours straight until the beast decided I was having too much fun and ended my jam session.(Won't mention his name here, unless he wants me to.) My amp has been in pawn (among other things) for almost 2 years and I had no way of getting it out. It was pawned together with my guitar, my bass, and my pedals. Now I only have a couple of things in pawn, and am doing everything I can to aviod having to pawn anything. One thing is for sure - my music gear will NEVER see a pawnshop again.
Since no one ordered any of my CD's online, I just figured no one was interested so stopped posting about them. There are 3 people that I told them I would send them copies for free, but I will have to wait to send these out until next month. So be patient with me. I'll get them to you as soon as I can.
Okay, I am officially rambling on and on, I'll stop now.
Just wishing I could get some sleep again, which I am guessing the lack of is what caused the cold, and now the weakness and light-headedness. I kept thinking all day that it is Saturday for some odd reason...sorry for the long post - just needed someone to talk to and right now, you're all I have.
Peace,
Carl D
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synergy
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #1 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 3:54am » |
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Carl - hang on in there hun, i know its tough but we are all here for you to get through this.
I think the phychiartist thing is well and truly fucked up - this is one of the reason marc wont go and see one for his panic attacks.
Dont give up yet hun - there is a cure out there for this horrible beast - and we will find it.
And dont worry about venting - get it all off your chest and vent away!!!!
Sending PF vibes your way hun - luv sarah xx
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Superpain
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #2 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 3:56am » |
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That sux man...
I've had similar experiences with psych's. Not to your extent, but they are a bunch of knowitall mofo's. I don't get it either... Fuckers. And Saudi on top of that!? 
How'd you come under his rule?
~~~~~~~~~~~~Vibes~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Lizzie2
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #3 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 6:25am » |
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Hey Carl,
Hang in there. Things are bound to get better at some point!!! Vibes to ya.
Also, just so you know in advance of your doctor's appt...Ativan is not a narcotic. It is a benzodiazepine, which is primarily used for anxiety, although a lot of people use it for sleep! It can cause dependence, but still a lot of people take it every night and some people just take it as needed. Just wanted you to know it is not a narcotic. It will show up on a urine drug screen, but under the classification of benzo. Are narcotics the only thing that the psychiatrist is blocking you from being allowed to have?
Also, if I were you I would try to fight that if you can. Is there any way you can see another psychiatrist at some point? They really shouldn't be able to say that you are not allowed to have them at all or your GP will lose his license! That seems a little fishy to me... How can a doctor work properly with someone threatening him/her over something like this? This is why doctors have a problem with prescribing adequate pain relief to patients.
This is a really short article on what is to come in dealings with the DEA and Pain Doctors. You might want to check it out:
http://headaches.about.com/b/a/105939.htm#more
In the meantime..hang in there!!! I'm glad you got you can play again, too. When I'm really stressed, I always sit down to play the piano. It makes me feel a lot better. Guess I gotta use that degree it took me 5 years to get for something! 
Smile and hugz,
Carrie/Lizzie2 
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juvy
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #4 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 8:00am » |
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Carl,
They're on the way *huge vibes*
Damn bastards...got any addresses? I've got a baseball bat and a foul mood.
Hang in there,
Juvy
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thomas
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #5 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 8:27am » |
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Vibes dude. 
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Jeepgun
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #6 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 9:01am » |
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Carl, that totally blows goats, and not in a good way...
Big-assed vibes winging their way to ya', bro'
-Frank
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Hirvimaki
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #7 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 9:48am » |
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Vibes, vibes and MORE VIBES your way, Carl!
Hang in there!
Hirvimaki
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Prense
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #8 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 10:00am » |
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Vibes brother!
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don
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #9 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 10:16am » |
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Quote:| Didn't care what I have wrong with me physically, and he even called me an alcoholic - even though I rarely drink anymore.. |
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Just a little clarification. It's been 10 years since I had a drink but my alcoholic diagnosis doesn't change. If you were diagnosed previously as meeting the criteria for alcoholic drinking behaviour then that doesn't change.
Did this guy see you on referal from another professional who may have shared imformation?
Finding a good therapist or psychiatrist is no differant than finding a good neuro. I f you stop looking, you only cheat yourself.
Quote:
Might also want to point out that withdrawal from benzos is by far the traumatizing withdrawal going.
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| « Last Edit: Aug 19th, 2004, 10:21am by don » |
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alleyoop
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #10 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 10:43am » |
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I really hate to see you like this Carl. Wish there was more I could do. Right now, all I can send you is vibes and prayers- coming your way!
......................................alley 
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AlienSpaceBabe
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #11 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 11:20am » |
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Big vibes comin' yer way, Carl....
and check your PMs
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lionsound
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #12 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 11:23am » |
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Carl,
I totally agree with Don about finding a good shrink. Keep looking!
I don't know how in the world he could make that assessment about you in a matter of minutes. And did he only spend minutes with you? Proper Psych evals take at least an hour and do include medical and other histories. You're exactly right about that.
Hope your storm will calm soon
Sending vibes your way!!!!
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don
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #13 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 11:25am » |
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Quote:| Psych evals take at least an hour |
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Yes they do. Thats why I asked if he was seeing this psychiatrist as a referal from another. The psych-Soc. eval would come with the referal.
Also a good shrink is only half the battle. You need a good therapist to compliment the shrink.
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| « Last Edit: Aug 19th, 2004, 11:26am by don » |
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lionsound
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #14 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 11:35am » |
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Exactly Don!
I must confess, I have both.
And earlier this year, when everything was rosy, they even talked to my neuro.
carl....get both!
And get more vibes from me!!!!!
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Gator
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #15 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 11:54am » |
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No need to ask bro. Big, fat, green Gator vibes heading your way.
Gator
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aprilbee
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #16 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 11:59am » |
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huge ass Okie vibes coming yer way!!! hang in there... 
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #17 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 3:52pm » |
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Hope you are feel better, brother.
Heya... we bid on that land about 35 miles north of you. Will let you know how that turns out.
Ltr,
Rock
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #18 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 4:32pm » |
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Hang in there brother!!
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BlueMeanie
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #19 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 5:43pm » |
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VIBES Carl.
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Tiannia
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #20 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 5:50pm » |
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Hun Vibes, energy, etc... on the way. I hope that you liked the CD I sent you but don't you dare worry about sending me one. I sent you that cause I hoped it would give you a little bit of enjoyment as I know that music is a good focus for you.
I have a psych degree and I HATE psychiatrists. I used to argue with them all the time when I was working with the mentally ill because they would see me clients for 2 minutes and write out a ton of scripts. Then I would yell at them telling them that I could not work with them and do my job if they did not work with me to keep them in a grouped functional state.
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Karla
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #21 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 6:23pm » |
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That is severely messed up. I had my dr, my neuro, and my shrink all talking and comunicating with eachother. They worked as a team. My shrink basically said if they didn't do something to stop the pain I was going to kill myself and that my quality of life was no existant and it was up to them to provide something for me to stop the pain. The 3 drs worked together and wrote letters to the insurance company telling them that I had to see a pain specialist at a different HMO. That HA/pain specialist was also a neuro who had me see a shrink that worked in the pain clinic. He agreed with my shrink and thats when the neuro talked to my dr and told him what pain meds to perscribe for me because I had tried everything with no luck. I saw the pain clinics shrink for well over an hour almost 2 hours. I saw my shrink several times for over a 1/2 hr each. I was being seen in the ER on an avg 4-8x a month. The er drs thought I was an addict I had one write a letter of concern to my dr. He was concerned that my dr wasn't doing his job right because I was comming in everytime I have a ha. My dr wrote him back and said that I had 8 ha a day and that I didn't come in every time I have a ha. That I had been professionally evaluated by shrinks, neuros, and drs and that me being seen in the ER was part of the plan. Once I was put on pain meds I was basically told by my dr to stay out of the ER which I did. I would recomend that you talk to your dr and get a referal to see a different more compassionate shrink. By the way I do believe that ativan is a benzo in the same family as xanax and valium. I know I have to sign for xanax everytime I get my script filled and my dr wont give me more than a months worth at a time. And it can be addicting. Sorry for the bad news. ((((((Carl)))))))I will be praying that you feel much better real soon and find a good dr.
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| « Last Edit: Aug 19th, 2004, 6:27pm by Karla » |
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Karla
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Jonny
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #22 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 9:21pm » |
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Think positive, Carl....at least you aint a waiter.......LOL
...................................jonny
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john_d
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #23 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 9:39pm » |
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on Aug 19th, 2004, 9:21pm, Jonny wrote:Think positive, Carl....at least you aint a waiter.......LOL
...................................jonny |
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....or a marathon runner
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don
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Re: I usually don't ask for this but...
« Reply #24 on: Aug 19th, 2004, 9:42pm » |
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Olympic Pole Vaulter would suck.
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