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Topic: An American Golfer in Ireland (Read 745 times) |
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E-Double
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An American Golfer in Ireland
« on: Aug 12th, 2004, 2:22pm » |
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An American golfer playing in Ireland hooked his drive into thewoods.
Looking for his ball, he found a little Leprechaun flat on his back, a big bump on his head and the golfer's ball beside him.
Horrified, the American golfer got his water bottle from the cart and poured it over the little guy, reviving him.
"Arrgh! What happened?" the Leprechaun asked. "Oh, I see. Well, ye got me fair and square. Ye get three wishes, so whaddya want?"
"Thank God, you're all right!" the golfer answered in relief. "I don't want anything. I'm just glad you're OK, and I apologize. I really didn't mean to hit you. " And the golfer walked off.
"What a nice guy," the Leprechaun said to himself. "But it was fair and square that he got me, and I have to do something for him. I'll give him the three things I would want....a great golf game, all the money he ever needs, and a fantastic sex life."
A year went by (as it does in stories like this) and the same American golfer returned to Ireland. On the same hole, he again hit a bad drive into the woods and the Leprechaun was there waiting for him.
"Twas me that made ye hit the ball here," the little guy said. "I just want to ask ye, how's yer golf game?"
"My game is fantastic!" the golfer answered. "In fact, that's the first bad ball I've hit in a year! I'm an internationally famous golfer now."
He added, "By the way, it's good to see you're all right."
"Oh, I'm fine now, thankee. I did that fer yer golf game, you know.
And tell me, how's yer money situation?"
"Why, it's just wonderful!" the golfer stated. "I win fortunes in golf. if I need cash, I just reach in my pocket and pull out $100.00 bills I didn't even know were there!"
"I did that fer ye also. And tell me, how's yer sex life?"
The golfer blushed, turned his head away in embarrassment, and said shyly, It's OK."
"C'mon, c'mon now," urged the Leprechaun, "I'm wanting to know if I Did a good job. How many times a day?"
Blushing even more, the golfer looked around then whispered, "Once--sometimes twice a week."
"What??" responded the Leprechaun in shock. "That's all? Only once or twice a week?"
"Well, said the golfer, "I figure that's not bad for a Catholic priest in a small town!"
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I can't believe that I have to bang my
Head against this wall again
But the blows they have just a little more
Space in-between them
Gonna take a breath and try again.
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Biker
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OUCH!!!!!!!!!!!
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Re: An American Golfer in Ireland
« Reply #1 on: Aug 12th, 2004, 3:21pm » |
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Oh my 
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Ride it like ya stole it.
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mynm156
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Re: An American Golfer in Ireland
« Reply #2 on: Aug 12th, 2004, 4:46pm » |
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"Half of the modern drugs could well be thrown out of the window, except that the birds might eat them."
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IndianaJohn
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Re: An American Golfer in Ireland
« Reply #3 on: Aug 14th, 2004, 1:03pm » |
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LMFAO!
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Did my brains fall out or is this headache over?
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