Author |
Topic: Men's Merit/Demerit Guide (Read 265 times) |
|
kim
New Board Newbie
I love YaBB 1G - SP1!
Posts: 7
|
 |
Men's Merit/Demerit Guide
« on: Feb 20th, 2003, 6:08pm » |
 Quote  Modify
|
> > > For thousands of years, men have tried to understand the Rules
> > > when dealing with women. Finally, this merit/demerit guide will
> > > help you to understand just how it works. Remember, in the world
> > > of romance, one single rule applies:
> > >
> > > Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points.
> > > Do something she dislikes and points are deducted. You don't get
> > > any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way
> > > the game is played.
> > >
> > > Here is a guide to the points system:
> > >
> > > SIMPLE DUTIES
> > > You make the bed.....+1
> > > You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows.. ....0
> > > You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets.....-1
> > > You leave the toilet seat up.....-5
> > > You replace the toilet paper roll when it is empty......0
> > > When the toilet paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex.....-1
> > > When the Kleenex runs out you use the next bathroom.....-2
> > > You go out to buy her extra-light liners with wings......+5
> > > In the snow .....+8
> > > But return with beer.....-5
> > > And no liners.....-25
> > >
> > > You check out a suspicious noise at night.....0
> > > You check out a suspicious noise and it is nothing.....0
> > > You check out a suspicious noise and it is something.....+5
> > > You pummel it with a six iron.....+10
> > > It's her cat.....-40
> > >
> > > AT THE PARTY
> > > You stay by her side the entire party.....0
> > > You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a College drinking buddy.....-2
> > > Named Tiffany.....-4
> > > Tiffany is a dancer.....-10
> > > With breast implants.....-18
> > >
> > > HER BIRTHDAY
> > > You remember her birthday.....0
> > > You buy a card and flowers.....0
> > > You take her out to dinner.....0
> > > You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar.....+1
> > > Okay, it is a sports bar.....-2
> > > And it's all-you-can-eat night.....-3
> > > It's a sports bar, its all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colors of your favorite team.....-10
> > >
> > > A NIGHT OUT WITH THE BOYS
> > > Go with a pal.....0
> > > The pal is happily married.....+1
> > > The pal is single.....-7
> > > He drives a Ferrari.....-10
> > > With a personalized license plate (GR8NBED).....-15
> > >
> > > A NIGHT OUT WITH HER
> > > You take her to a movie.....+2
> > > You take her to a movie she likes.....+4
> > > You take her to a movie you hate.....+6
> > > You take her to a movie you like.....-2
> > > It's called Death Cop III.....-3
> > > Which features Cyborgs that eat humans.....-9
> > > You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans.....-15
> > >
> > > YOUR PHYSIQUE
> > > You develop a noticeable pot belly.....-15
> > > You develop a noticeable pot belly & exercise to get rid of it.....+10
> > > You develop a noticeable pot belly and resort to loose jeans and baggy
> > > Hawaiian shirts.....-30
> > > You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too.".....-800
> > >
> > > THE BIG QUESTION
> > > She asks, "Does this dress make me look fat?"
> > > You hesitate in responding.....-10
> > > You reply, "Where?".....-35
> > > You reply, "No, I think it's your ass"......-100
> > > Any other response.....-20
> > >
> > > COMMUNICATION
> > > When she wants to talk about a problem:
> > > You listen, displaying a concerned expression.....0
> > > You listen, for over 30 minutes.....+5
> > > You relate to her problem and share a similar experience......+50
> > > You're mind wanders to sports and you suddenly hear her saying well, what do you think I should do?".....-100
> > > You have fallen asleep.....-200
> > >
> > > IT'S THAT TIME OF THE MONTH
> > > You talk.....-100
> > > You don't talk.....-150
> > > You spend time with her......-200
> > > You don't spend time with her.....-500
> > > You seem to be enjoying yourself.....-1000
> > >
> > > Game Over - YOU LOSE
|
|
 IP Logged |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Home
Help
Search
Members
Member Map
Login
Register
Reply
Notify of replies
Send Topic
Print
test rss