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   Author  Topic: cluster and the holidays  (Read 267 times)
clustey
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cluster and the holidays
« on: Nov 26th, 2003, 3:05am »
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Well it's holiday time again folks. The weather starts to cool down, football season is in full swing, christamas commercials fill our t.v. screens. People are becoming more festive and oh yes, relatives seem to pop out from everywhere. Why here comes uncle Joe right now. The first thing he'll say to me is "lets have a beer". I'll explain again, this year, why I can't drink. "That's nonsence" he'll say. "What's a little headache, just take some asprin and you'll be fine." Right behind him is aunt Mary. She'll tell me about a cure that came to her in a dream: "just take two cloves of garlic smothered in whipped cream, cool whip to be exact, then rub it all over your head while you dance naked in the backyard.
Then there's cousin Rob. He's a real man. He lifts weights.
"Never been sick a day in my life" He'll say. "What, all this medicine for a crummy headache? You should pump up like me, then you won't get no headaches. Is there a mirror near by?" Then comes old uncle Marty. "God is punishing you, son. You must have touched yourself at one time. Repent now while there's still time and your headaches will vanish. Pass the gravy please." Then my wonderful sister will show up, "I told you so. I told you you were weird and now you proved it with these things. HA HA Jimmy's got cluster headaches. NA NA NA NA NA. All this and its not even thanksgiving yet. Oh boy, I think I'll take some asprin. Wink
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BlueMeanie
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Re: cluster and the holidays
« Reply #1 on: Nov 26th, 2003, 3:11am »
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Couldn't of said it better ! ROTFLMAO
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BarbaraD
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Re: cluster and the holidays
« Reply #2 on: Nov 26th, 2003, 5:49am »
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Didn't Aunt Ida show up this year? Opps, maybe she's coming to my house to tell me about the "one she had one time and how awful it was."  Tongue
 
Oh well, Happy Turkey Day.  
 
Hugs BD
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Re: cluster and the holidays
« Reply #3 on: Nov 26th, 2003, 7:31am »
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LMAO too funny! Isn't that the truth!
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Jackie S.
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Re: cluster and the holidays
« Reply #4 on: Nov 26th, 2003, 7:42am »
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Grin
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Tim

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Re: cluster and the holidays
« Reply #5 on: Nov 26th, 2003, 4:25pm »
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Don't forget Uncle Roy - who'll tell you about this wonderful new product called Excedrin Migraine that has worked wonders, WONDERS, do you hear, for his poor supervisor Carol who gets so ill she has to lie down when her monthlies come around....
 
Oh, ther's no place like home for the holidays....
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Re: cluster and the holidays
« Reply #6 on: Nov 26th, 2003, 4:31pm »
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on Nov 26th, 2003, 3:05am, clustey wrote:
Then comes old uncle Marty. "God is punishing you, son. You must have touched yourself at one time. Wink

Uh-oh, now I know how I got these things.  Thanks uncle Marty.
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BobG
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Re: cluster and the holidays
« Reply #7 on: Nov 26th, 2003, 4:33pm »
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My Uncle Skeeter will over tomorrow.
 
His first words will be "Got a Coors?"
 
I'll say "No, I got a headache."
 
He'll say "That's just a little hangover. Some hair-of-the-dog (he talks with dashes between his words) will cure that. Got a Coors?"
 
I'll say "No but I got ice water."
 
He'll say "Oh hell, water is just to wash your underwear in. I need a beer."
 
By the end of the day Uncle Skeeter wil be face down in the mashed potatos.
« Last Edit: Nov 26th, 2003, 4:33pm by BobG » IP Logged

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Re: cluster and the holidays
« Reply #8 on: Nov 26th, 2003, 4:41pm »
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Hmmm, and to think I was a little sad that I wasn't going to be with my whole family this year.  Reading this has made me thankful just to be here without the aunts and uncles.   Grin
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Tiannia
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Re: cluster and the holidays
« Reply #9 on: Nov 26th, 2003, 4:52pm »
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Well see then there is my mother, who has had to "survive" migraines all of her life.  "And you can't possible understand the type of pain that I have to deal with. (as she takes 2 more lortab 7.5's, washed down with that rum and coke) But all you need is a good nights sleep, really and you'll be fine."  And by the end of the dinner she is in a drug induced stuppor and "has to go lay down" and we all need to "be quiet now"  because she has one of her headaches.  
 
This is why we have dinner with just Shaun, me and the kids.
 
Have a great Holiday everyone.
 
Tiannia
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Re: cluster and the holidays
« Reply #10 on: Nov 26th, 2003, 5:11pm »
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Quote:
HA HA Jimmy's got cluster headaches. NA NA NA NA NA. All this and its not even thanksgiving yet. Oh boy, I think I'll take some asprin

 
Makes you want to load the blunderbuss hanging in the den.
 
Great story though  Cheesy
 
Sad that I wasn't missed years ago when I stood on the patio in a blizzard for 20 minutes being thankful for this horror.
 
Only my Aunt Helen gave me the: "How can they be that  bad?" shit.  Fortunately, I can remember having them at Thanksgiving only once.  Also, alcohol wasn't a trigger and Wild Turkey-laced eggnog helped to dull my senses even more.  Happy days, happy days.
 
It's your turn for a break kids.  
 
Charlie and my virtual family
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