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Ted
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April Fools...
« on: Apr 1st, 2003, 7:31am »
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...headlines
 
 
Tourism in New York City hurt by war fears, presence of New Yorkers  
 
New study shows that human male sperm will swim towards chemical attractants to find the female egg; no explanation given about why so many find their way to female tonsils  
 
Hussein says 4,000 Arabs have come to Iraq for martyrdom; "but they'll stay for the apricots!" beams Minister of Agriculture  
 
Contact lenses that dispense drugs may one day help treat glaucoma; "it would also be a super-cool way to watch Pink Floyd's 'The Wall,'" notes bespectacled stoner  
 
US troops prepare for possible urban warfare; move soldiers born in Detroit to the front  
 
Maintaining everyday routine may be best way to reduce wartime anxieties; New Jersey man relieved to know that beating off into sock every morning is good for his mental health  
 
Rumsfeld says fiercest fighting still ahead; "it will probably occur when I get into a room alone with Peter Arnett," fumes Secretary of Defense  
 
E-Mail and TV are lifelines for military spouses, guys who like Funyons  
 
CDC recommends postponing "nonessential travel" to China and Taiwan due to presence of mystery virus; "of course, if you need to get some cheap plastic toys, then you need to get some cheap plastic toys," says agency chief sympathetically  
 
Air Force Academy to replace leadership after rape scandals; Ike Turner offers his services "to help quiet things down"  
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nancyc
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Re: April Fools...
« Reply #1 on: Apr 1st, 2003, 10:45am »
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Tristan's 1st birthday...and this is no joke...we celebrated his birthday right before his dad left...smiles,nancyc
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Slammy
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Re: April Fools...
« Reply #2 on: Apr 1st, 2003, 11:10am »
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on Apr 1st, 2003, 7:31am, Ted wrote:

 
New study shows that human male sperm will swim towards chemical attractants to find the female egg; no explanation given about why so many find their way to female tonsils  
"  

 
 
 
 
Bahahahaha!!!   LMMFAO!!!    ;D
 
I like that one!   Cheesy
 
 
 
Slammy   Cool
« Last Edit: Apr 1st, 2003, 11:11am by Slammy » IP Logged

That's it! Everyone out of the pool!

" Everytime I try to get out, they PULL me back in! "
BILL_L
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Re: April Fools...
« Reply #3 on: Apr 1st, 2003, 12:13pm »
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Next time I am going to marry a girl with tonsils.
 Cry Cry Cry Cry Cry Cry Cry Cry Cry
            Bill
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Re: April Fools...
« Reply #4 on: Apr 1st, 2003, 12:24pm »
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This is a special day for me too. 10 years ago today my darling husband  Tongue walked out on me and my kids.
I called my inlaws and told them and they laughed thinking it was an april fools joke. (what a bunch of dumbass's) It took them a whole day to realize it wasnt a joke.  Roll Eyes
Well the jokes on hubby, never got a divorce so when its time to retire, I'll be taking half of his 2 retirement funds....awww life is good now.  Wink
 
suzy
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brain_cramps
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Re: April Fools...
« Reply #5 on: Apr 1st, 2003, 12:44pm »
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on Apr 1st, 2003, 7:31am, Ted wrote:
Contact lenses that dispense drugs may one day help treat glaucoma; "it would also be a super-cool way to watch Pink Floyd's 'The Wall,'" notes bespectacled stoner

 
something else I have to look forward to.   LOTSA glaucoma in the family.
 
grant
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echo
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Re: April Fools...
« Reply #6 on: Apr 1st, 2003, 12:46pm »
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Well it will certainly teach him a hard lesson on taking care of the details of life.
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Re: April Fools...
« Reply #7 on: Apr 1st, 2003, 3:48pm »
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     Ted,  
 
 
      You've given me the first laugh in 2 weeks..
 
 One can always count on Ted.   Thanks.
 
 
 
 
 
   LindaH
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cootie
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Re: April Fools...
« Reply #8 on: Apr 1st, 2003, 6:21pm »
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My beloved palimino trick horse would of been 20 today I had to have put down Sept 11th....ironically it was that same dreadful day we had the apt. In memory of....Joker's Sham........Pam
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Re: April Fools...
« Reply #9 on: Apr 1st, 2003, 7:56pm »
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on Apr 1st, 2003, 12:13pm, BILL_L wrote:
Next time I am going to marry a girl with tonsils.
 Cry Cry Cry Cry Cry Cry Cry Cry Cry
                                                    Bill

                                 LMMFAO!      ..........Jack
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Woobie
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Re: April Fools...
« Reply #10 on: Apr 1st, 2003, 8:23pm »
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Woobie has tonsils.......hehe Shocked Roll Eyes ;D
Ramon
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