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Topic: Axis of Evil Wannabees (Read 412 times) |
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fubar
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Axis of Evil Wannabees
« on: Mar 30th, 2003, 5:47pm » |
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Axis of Evil Wannabees
Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the "Axis of Evil", Libya, China and Syria today announced that they had formed the "Axis of Just as Evil", which they said would be more evil than that stupid Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of in his State of the
Union address.
Axis of Evil members, however, immediately dismissed the new Axis as having, for starters, a really dumb name.
"Right! They are just as evil . . . in their dreams!" declared North Korean leader Kim Jong-il.
"Everybody knows we're the best evils . . . best at being evil ... we're the best."
Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over being excluded, although they conceded they did ask if they could join the Axis of Evil. "They told us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar al-Assad.
"An axis can't have more than three countries!", explained Iraqi President Saddam Hussein. "This is not my rule, it's tradition. In World War II you had Germany, Italy, and Japan in the evil Axis. So, you can only have three, and a secret handshake. Ours is wickedly cool."
International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil declaration was swift, as within minutes, France surrendered.
Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations rushed to gain triumvirate status in what has become a game of geopolitical chairs.
[continued]
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"He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how." -- Friedrich Nietzsche
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fubar
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Re: Axis of Evil Wannabees
« Reply #1 on: Mar 30th, 2003, 5:48pm » |
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[continued]
Cuba, Sudan and Serbia announced that they had formed the "Axis of Somewhat Evil", forcing Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the "Axis of occasionally Evil", while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the "Axis of Not So Much Evil Really as Just Generally Disagreeable".
With the criteria suddenly expanded and all the desirable clubs filling up, Sierra Leone, El Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be called the "Axis of Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly Won't Be Asked to Host the Olympics".
Canada, Mexico and Australia formed the "Axis of Nations That Are Actually Quite Nice But Secretly Have Some Nasty Thoughts About America", while Scotland, New Zealand and Spain established the "Axis of Countries That Want Sheep to Wear Lipstick". "That's not a threat, really, just something we like to do", said Scottish Executive First Minister Jack MacConnell.
While wondering if the other nations of the world weren't perhaps making fun of him, a cautious Bush granted approval for most axis, although he rejected the establishment of the "Axis of Countries Whose Names End in "guay", accusing one of its members of filing a false application.
Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay, and Franceguay denied the charges.
Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't want to join any axis, but privately world leaders said that's because no one's asked.
[end]
-Fu (who did not write this)
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| « Last Edit: Mar 30th, 2003, 5:51pm by fubar » |
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"He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how." -- Friedrich Nietzsche
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catlind
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Re: Axis of Evil Wannabees
« Reply #2 on: Mar 30th, 2003, 5:56pm » |
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ROFLMMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cat
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If yer gonna be stupid, ya gotta be tough
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don
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Re: Axis of Evil Wannabees
« Reply #3 on: Mar 30th, 2003, 6:04pm » |
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France can start their own axis. "The axis of run away, run away, countries" for the remaining mealy mouth weasel countries with bladder problems.
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Roxy
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Re: Axis of Evil Wannabees
« Reply #4 on: Mar 30th, 2003, 6:05pm » |
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on Mar 30th, 2003, 5:56pm, catlind wrote:ROFLMMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Couldn't have said it better...... ;D
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Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. (Einstein)
I used to have a handle on life....but it broke.
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kissmyglass
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Re: Axis of Evil Wannabees
« Reply #5 on: Mar 30th, 2003, 6:15pm » |
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Man Fu ya got me ROTHLMAO again today....
Kev C
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"It does so fucking look like her" - Picasso
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